my wife has been doing things behind my back and now she has opend a seperate bank account and a post office box what should i do
2007-01-25 23:49:12 · 34 answers · asked by not happy 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Sounds like she is getting ready to bail. If you have anything of value around the house that you want to hang on to you better hide it now or get it out of there for safekeeping because one day soon you will come home she will be gone along with most of the stuff in the place.
2007-01-25 23:55:55 · answer #1 · answered by Kokopelli 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
While it is good for a woman to have her own banking account, and even a line of credit in case something unforeseen happens, the rest of the stuff you cited is troubling. You need to talk with her about it.
Have you gone on vacation with her and just her recently?
If you haven't schedule a surprise weekend trip so both of you can reconnect. Spend the entire weekend listening to her, and pampering her the way you probably did right before you proposed. Leave computers, and blackberries at home.
Do you have an anniversary or birthday coming up?
Would it be like your wife to plan a huge special celebration?
I have hid stuff from my husband before, but only when I was planning a surprise.
You might want to also get a safety deposit box in a bank you have never used before and place in it the things you absolutely don't want her to have, transfer some of your savings into savings bonds and place them into the box as well, and hide the key.
2007-01-26 00:22:32 · answer #2 · answered by Mad Maxine 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Are you having other problems with her or her with you? She may be planning to leave you soon. She won't leave without her pocket full a money, so she's trying to secure some cash for when she leaves. What else does she do behind your back? If she doesn't know you know of the other bank account, don't confront her yet. Go for help from your Church Pastor or counselor now. Work it out somehow. If you break up, the next relationship will have it's faults so it makes sense to stay in close communication with her. Remeber, you don't have to win all the time.
2007-01-26 00:05:23 · answer #3 · answered by cardo11 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She opened a seperate bank account and post office box you really need to talk to her about it. Trust is the main thing needed in a marriage. I do not know why she opened them in the first place but you need to know why. If she refuses to tell you and that says that you snoop to much that would put up red flags and I would want to end the marriage because of the trust and communication not being there.
2007-01-26 00:41:47 · answer #4 · answered by Danielle 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
As being a victim of this many years ago, I can say that there could be something going on. I don't know if you are financially stable or not, unemployed or whatever. If both you and your wife have become drifted apart from each other, it is time to try to talk about it with each other. Ask her why she is doing this. If she doesn't want to discuss this with you, suggest seeing a marriage counselor. If she refuses, this could be a signal of ending the marriage.
2007-01-25 23:59:04 · answer #5 · answered by Yafooey! 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your wife is on an extreme action plan. Lot more should have happened in the past. There could be misunderstandings or communication gaps. it is always advisable to talk out in a free and unshackled environment without the intervention of a third party. Please do it with a very sincere heart and a soft tongue. Your objective seems to save the relationship; otherwise this question would not come up! May be, she just wants financial independence. If yes, let her have it and cooperate with her in the pursuit of this objective. Please be supportive and not abortive. One fine morning, you could see the miracle!
2007-01-25 23:58:55 · answer #6 · answered by braj k 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If there are no kids involved, do what I would do... Secretly rent anapartment, take a day off work, and just leave. Move all of your stuff out and leave your wedding ring and house keys on the coffee table before bailing. Don't say a word, and don't communicate until the divorce papers are drawn up...
2007-01-25 23:59:28 · answer #7 · answered by Ray 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like someone has something to hide. If that was me and my boyfriend did something like that I would ask him about it. I've been burned in the past by a couple of my ex's so I wouldn't tolerate it. I would leave. Not the answer though that I should tell you. I should tell you to maybe seek a marriage counselor. Try to work things out. Don't walk away until you can say you tried to fix it.
2007-01-25 23:55:47 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
its call communication its to sat down and talk asked her why and what is the need also get a safe depost box at your bank and place all bank card and check into the box for safe keeping also remove her name from all account check bank card for the same reson that she give you because you have to out smart the fox if she plan to leave you that fine but not with your money
2007-01-26 00:08:52 · answer #9 · answered by nightman122554 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Talk to her about it. It sounds to me like she is planning on leaving you. Make sure to keep an eye on things. (Something similar happened to a friend, the spouse started putting all the money into the single person account, then left with everything)
2007-01-26 00:00:39 · answer #10 · answered by Cheryl F 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋