Are you close with your parents? Could you tell them u've messed up your life?

Question

I love my parents the most. All my life I've been the nice good daughter - good grades, popular and now a career to be proud of. But life hasnt been all rosy for me outside of the house -bad boys, wreck an engagement, affairs stupid stuff i know i shouldnt do..
Ive messed up my life and none of my parents knew about it. At night i cried thinking of all the stupid mess id done but when my mom knocked on the door i go wash my face and put on some lipgloss. i'm always dealing with crazy issues (who doesnt right?) and im dying to tell them but theyre such good people theyre gonna think oh god whats wrong with our daughter..

Answer 1

I am close to my parents, and there have been times in my life when I have felt like I wanted to let it all out and tell them everything that I was needing to talk to them about. But that question is different for everyone. Nobody knows your family life like you do. However you can try to calm your own thoughts and emotions. A lot of situations or decisons we've made may be considered "messing up our lives" but reconsider. I thought that I had messed up my life at one point. But I was still alive. First, I realized that once I stopped stressing so much about it, my life wasn't messed up at all the way I thought. Things change all the time. It may not have turned out the way I thought, or wanted but I realized I could still be happy. Do some soul searching, and try to make peace with yourself. True happiness isn't dependet on circumstancial things. It's a state of mind. Nobody knows your parents like you do. If you feel like you need to ask for help or go talk to them, talk to them. Most parents, I think, love their children no matter what. It doesn't mean they don't think you should accept the responsiblities or consequences of your actions, but they will most likely still love you just the same. It's not easy to "let it all hang out" but it is good for the soul. If you think it'll help, go seek a counselor or some professional guidance. There is nothing wrong with this. It is always good to get things off your chest, get a new outlook, and seek peace in your own mind because that is the place where you truly do the living.

Answer 2

I know how you feel. All my life I've lived with depression - and not, "boo hoo, I'm depressed, everyone pay attention to me," I mean, "near-suicidal punching holes in the walls in tears" depression. Most of the time it's tolerable, but there's some days where it's horrible. It has gradually made me a very pessimistic and cynical person. Depression is very misunderstood. Personally, I think people who don't have it have no idea how bad it really is, and it makes me uncomfortable to talk about it among my peers because I'm afraid they'll come to the conclusion that "I'm just a *****" or I'm just not "sucking it up" enough. Point is, I suffer from similar feelings every day of my life, and I have some things I can suggest. They typically don't work for me, but that's because I have depression, and since you don't and you're just in a rough patch, you might benefit from the advice. 1) Never be in silence. Sitting alone in silence can be a depressed person's worst enemy - thinking about every single moment you've made a mistake except magnified many, many, times to the point where things going on around you are drowned out by a bubbling, screaming despair and rage until the only thing that can get rid of it is breaking something with your fist. Always try to have some sort of ambient sound, and try not to be in silence. 2) Try new things. Surrounding yourself with new activities, perhaps things you've always wanted to try, gets your mind off of your problems and focuses on the new activity. You may even enjoy yourself, and viola you have a new hobby as well. 3) Speaking of hobbies, find one. The trick is to keep your mind off your problems for as long as possible, because, realistically, it doesn't seem like there's a lot you can do to fix the hand you've been dealt. You just have to go on with the only consolation being that things will get better. I know it sounds tacky and insincere, but it's a fact. Life is a roller coaster with its ups and its downs. But you know what? This life will his you, hard, in the face, wait for you to get back up just so it can kick you in the stomach, but getting the wind knocked out of you is the only way to remind your lungs how much they like the taste of air. Don't do anything drastic, try new things, and don't get put down. Don't do anything drastic like cutting or anything - I attempted suicide when I was younger and it's the biggest mistake I've ever made. Just know that things will get better, that I promise you. Everything will be okay in the end. If it's not okay, it's not the end. OneLove.

Answer 3

I love my parents also, and I to messed up my life. I married a bad man, then divorced, then married an abusive man and divorced. Then I straightened out my life and married a good man. Things can turn around! For along time I thought I let my parents down. But I too am a parent and we never really let our parents down cause mistakes are a part of life and learning. I tell my kids no matter what mistakes they make in there life, I will always love them! I just encourage them to learn from their mistakes! I hope things work our for you very soon! I also wish you good luck!

Answer 4

I am sure your parents are loving and understanding. Talk to them and I bet they may even have some good advice for you. Nobody is perfect and everyone makes mistakes. Can you own up the mistakes and not continue making them. Just remember, your parents don't have to know every single crazy ****** up thing you've done.

Answer 5

Please-go have a good talk with your mother-father too if you feel you can. Or let her be the one you talk to-and have her break the news to him. Parents are pretty smart people. They (especially your Mom) probably can sense that there is something going on-that you are being respected by them-and figure if you really want to talk about it with them-you will. Parents know their children are not perfect-they also know they are not perfect parents. They aren't going to think there is anything wrong with you-you are human, allowed mistakes. I truly donn't think they have you on a pedestal. It's okay to talk with them-they love you very much. They want the best for you. Please, go talk with them. You will be glad you did. Wishing you the best. Take care.

Answer 6

oh come on now...you honestly don't think they know you've suffered heartache in your life? Your parents know more than you realize...they are just respecting your privacy...

they may be good people, but they have been through their fair share of hell...(like you said yourself...who doesn't deal with crazy issues)

if you feel like you need their guidance go to them...first thing out of their mouth is going to be...what took you so long...

stop trying to be perfect and start being human...

Answer 7

dont worry and stress so much about it... Everyone does stupid things when there young that there parents never find out !!!!! .. just dont keep repeating the same mistakes.. learn from them and move on to better things.... as far as what you have done in the past..... tell them if u feel ok with it .. otherwise some things are better left in the past. :)

Answer 8

well we all make mistakes. but is what you did really bad. i think you should tell them, no matter what happens they will always be your parents and love you. i hide lots of stuff from my parents, but i just can't tell them, but maybe you are stronger than me and you have the courage to tell them.
good luck :]
i am sure is not that bad.
oh yeah....tell them how sorry you really are and what made you do that. but, if you are scared to tell them try this: imagine you were them and your duaghter/son had the same problem...how would you react. ==>hope that helps.
bye, goodnight.
and please don't cry :(

Answer 9

You will be o.k. I am sure your parents did stuff they did not tell you about. If it is eatting you up inside tell the one you are closest to first. I am sure they will understand and it's best if you tell them than they finding out for other sources. Then they wouldn;t trust you or give you the time of day to explain. You will be o.k I am praying for you.

Answer 10

Just tell them. You dont have to tell them everything, just a little when things get too hard to handle by yourself. Its ok to let your parents see you cry, its normal to cry. They wont think anything is wrong with you, just tell them you had a really bad day if you cant open up to them.
My dad always says to me, If you cant talk to me and tell me things, then Ive failed you as a father.

We are all human and we all need help, esspecially that of our parents. I never feel to old to cuddle up to my mum and tell her exactly how terrible my day was! :o)