I am married to a doctor who was married for 27 years to the same person. With his profession you wouldn't think he would be insecure. He goes through my phone. burned old love letters. Can not relate to the party scene. Thinks my skirts and shorts to short. Get mad if I run into old friends and talk about old times. What is up with his guy. His x-wife was very homely looking. In my day I was a Budweiser girl and a Miller Girl. I get alot of attention than and I still do. But I am very faithful. When its okay when he takes his only employee out to lunch, looks at apartments for her daughter, (she is married) ignore my phone calls when he is doing something with her and knows he shouldn't. It seems what is good for him is good for me! So tell me. All good guys have issues too.
2007-01-25 15:19:30 · 14 answers · asked by Bu-twa 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
He's from the old school. Wants a prim and proper wife. Just reassure him of your love daily and never give him a reason, not to trust you
2007-01-25 15:32:29 · answer #1 · answered by Bonduesa 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Good points...
I've been married for 28 years and together with my wife for 31 yrs. in total...
We all must let go of our pasts at let the present lives show us into our futures...
A good dusting and garage sales event would be helpful for both of you two..
She may have been homely and not a Bud Miller time girl ...but she was his wife...that you are now...enjoy one another.....communicate ...
love each other...and don't hold in favour one an others past as each of you weren't part of those times....let go of your times and become part of his...lengthen the dress some...get rid of those old love letters ....or...
maybe the single life should have been your choice this time...I don't know ...I'm just assuming that your still very attractive and he may be a little more a conservative-styled husband...
Hope this helps....live each day with your loved ones as it may be your last one...
and never pass up a chance to tell them how important they are to you and how much you really love them........good luck!!!
2007-01-25 16:00:30 · answer #2 · answered by yahoo 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
RUN for your life. I think that he may have had those behaviors prior to marriage and you thought they were "cute". But now married to "cute" ain't so cute after all. Doctor or not they are men first and you need to consider that he may be a man with a lot of insecurities that you can not fix. Whether his old relationship left him burned, it is not up to you to fix the broken and wounded. Sorry, but you should have not gotten involve with such a soul, but if I were you, I would tell him either he gets counseling for himself or I am out of here. Period!
2007-01-25 15:32:39 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You seem to equate him being a doctor with him being a nice guy. It has nothing to do with it! He shouldn't be hanging out with his secretary and her daughter and you shouldn't be dressing in short shorts if you are of a certain age. It sounds like you like the attention, then you wonder why he is concerned. Try dressing appropriately and giving him some attention and see if he becomes more focused on you.
2007-01-25 15:29:50 · answer #4 · answered by schweetums 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The key for a happy relationship is good communication. You should be telling this things to him and not asking them on Yahoo answers. I always say that the right person is someone that makes us fit right on to their lives, very comfortable with no grudges of any type. If there is something that bothers you, makes you unhappy..TELL HIM. What is the worse that can happen?
2007-01-25 15:29:46 · answer #5 · answered by Jessica G 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He is a little possessive sounding. Also he might see you as a "trophy" wife especially if you are younger than him. I would try to talk to him about his behavior and set certain boundaries that you both have to follow. He might also feel that your too good looking for him and scared you will leave him. As long as he doesn't start to become abusive.
2007-01-25 15:30:33 · answer #6 · answered by Cristina 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
sorry to here that you cant have a beer with old friends and new but you sound like a good girl that married the wrong person so if your Jekyll and Hyde cant let you live with your pride ask your pool man for help and invite him inside.
2007-01-25 15:35:11 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
it sounds like this guy is a patriarchal ***, not so much insecure. it sounds like he wants to keep you "barefoot and pregnant" as they say, so be careful of him turning potentially dangerous. try to resolve your problems with him as best and as soon you can, but if there are no results or things get worse, get out as soon as you can. remember - his doctor's salary isn't worth you having to lie about bruises. no woman has to put up with abuse. if he is abusing you, don't try to justify it to yourself. contact the police, and save yourself and your children, if you have any with him or from other relationships.
all people have issues, not just nice guys. people who say they don't have issues have a problem with being stinky liars. so you shouldn't try to exclude a small portion of the population when the rest of the outside population has the exact same traits as the one being called out.
2007-01-25 15:35:10 · answer #8 · answered by bigwoodenhead 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well there could be several reasons, maybe he HAS cheated so he is so insecure about your doings, thus being paranoid... or maybe in his past relationship he cheated ... usually when a person becomes paranoid or suspicious or down right insecure about their partner, and protective like that, its because they feel guilty and are super paranoid you are or may do the same thing...
2007-01-25 15:29:38 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why did you have old love letters in the first place? And why are you part of the "party scene" if you are married? I'd be suspicious too!
2007-01-25 15:28:55 · answer #10 · answered by T.M.Y. 4 · 4⤊ 1⤋