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I think im a good wife and mother i work full time im not the best house keeper in the world by i try. My husband is very controlling anytime i want to go anywhere with out the kids with me we get into a big argument. I need some me time, im not talking about going to the bars or out all night, just some time to myself once in a while. I try to keep the kids out of his hair whens he tired or needs time to himself . Is it so much for me to ask for some time to myself also. He can go where ever he wants and im fine with it . I cant deal with this anymore. please help!!!!!!!!

2007-01-25 10:09:54 · 14 answers · asked by Notsogreatlife31 1 in Family & Relationships Marriage & Divorce

14 answers

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2007-01-25 10:24:31 · answer #1 · answered by diamond8784 3 · 0 0

I feel when a woman decides to have children she should commit herself to being a mother. Since you have a full time job this is really your "me" time. Since you do work you are not obligated to baby your husband. Stop babying him. Let the kids drive him crazy, make him help with the housework (time for him to start doing his own laundry). You are only one person, you can not do it all and do it all well. Remember he can not control you if you don't let him. No need to pick a fight. Just listen to what he is asking, decide if it is the best thing to do and do what you want. What is he going to do? Sit you in a corner? Should he ask why you are not "obeying" him, simply tell him that you are not10 years old and can think for yourself. In the end he will respect you for it and actually be happy there is another adult in the house, and if he doesn't ...that's his problem.

2007-01-25 18:27:30 · answer #2 · answered by lily 6 · 0 0

My husband is the same way. You know what I do, tell him to deal with it! When I need a break I usually go sit near the ocean and talk on my cell phone. I don't care too much if it bothers him, I do the same things you do, keep the kids out of his hair, let him relax and go somewhere when he wants, occasionally I complain just to show him how it feels. I say do what you need to do, if it causes a little argument I am sure that is worth the break you get. Good luck.

2007-01-25 18:24:23 · answer #3 · answered by Happy 3 · 1 0

If your good person and all you need is my time alone. Then you should get it. You need to stop worry about his needs.You said you give him time out and try to keep the kids out of his way when he tried. You do that because you know its the right thing to do. But your not doing whats right for you. So its time you stop worry about that for you can have some me time. If you can't deal with it no more then just do it. In when you get back am sure his going to argue with you but you all ready know that, so be ready for it. In when the arguing done you tell him with a strong tone in your voice in mean it or he going to think you won't, you tell him and am going to do it again, me time, so get use to it buddy. If you don't do it your always going to want to and never do. Then you really would have nothing to complain about no more, because you learned to suck it up. He won, in your still depress. Everyone needs time alone. To find yourself. So stop complaining in do it. go by him ten stupid things couples do to mess up their lives by Dr. Laura C.Schlessinger.

2007-01-25 18:31:34 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

Get a sitter for the kids and go out with your husband and have alone time with just him.... When he is at work find a sitter and go out by yourself for a couple of hours if need be.

2007-01-25 18:31:18 · answer #5 · answered by Lady Hewitt 6 · 0 0

I think you should till him flat out that you need some time to yourself.Tell him how stress out you are about going to work and then coming home and taking care of the kids.It's taking a toll on you and your relationship.Tell him that you let him go do whatever he has to do or go out,and all you are asking for is alittle time away for yourself.

2007-01-25 18:24:30 · answer #6 · answered by Amanda M 2 · 0 0

you do need your own time and space ...as a mom and as a woman. My outlet is the gym...not just professionally but for taking care of myself-healthwise.Perhaps suggest a gym membership so that way he at least has a destination in mind when you say you need to get out! Hope it helps!

2007-01-25 18:18:56 · answer #7 · answered by justsayin... 3 · 0 0

First you have to admit to yourself that there is either a trust issue or a control issue, either way you need to confront him and began taking back control of your life. Well, as far as getting his trust back, I'm not sure. But I will say this in good faith, trust yourself.

2007-01-25 19:04:12 · answer #8 · answered by Andre 1 · 0 0

You need to tell him what you just told us. Let him know that you need to have some time to yourself. Let him know that he has time to himself. Hopefully, he will try ro understand and give you some space. Good luck.

2007-01-25 18:27:11 · answer #9 · answered by tigerprincess_bee 6 · 0 0

hire a babysitter and go out...whether he is home or not....or take the kids to your mothers or a sisters so you can have a few hours to yourself...every woman needs that...good luck

2007-01-25 18:28:24 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

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