I have a bf who I've been with for about 5 years. Problem is, I don't think he will ever commit. I don't want to push him into it, but I think we have been through enough to actually be considered "married". He also treats me like some sort of "trophy" girl. Also, the fact that he would share me with other people makes me think that he is not with me for the right reasons. Don't get me wrong, I love the guy and all, I would just like an outside opinion. Another thing is--I have 2 children from a previous marriage that he has taken on as his own. Why do you think he is with me and should I stay in this and why?
2007-01-25 07:19:38 · 8 answers · asked by BRIDGIE74 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
I'm thinking your "gut" feeling has already told you the real answer to this question! Now it's up to you to truly decide if this is what you want. But first you need to also ask yourself why your bf should make a commitment? He has everything he WANTS and NEEDS already, why mess things up? Did you notice I said HE? So, where do your wants and needs come in? Are you just as important in this relationship? I sure hope so! Is your wants and needs just as important? You dang right they are! If your not sure, and have doubts, your the one with the problem! Insecurity! Just for the record, you can't push anyone into anything, it will blow-up first, If he shares you, he doesn't love you.. I hope you find your way!! You have two children that count on you for everything I am sure! Love them strong, the rewards are will last a life time!
2007-01-25 08:24:49 · answer #1 · answered by sue d 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are giving sex without asking anything in return. No committment and he can leave anytime he wants to. Don't be fooled by the I love the children routine. That is a joke.
Most men don't even like their own kids.
Your paying all the bills and while your at work he is running around. You clean the house, cook the meals and wait on him.
Why should he leave? If that is all you want out of a relationship that's fine. What do you mean share you with other people?
Let you have sex with other men?
If that is the case walk away. Get the song "walk away"
play it every day. I once had a time when I needed an old song called , "I am woman" Played it everyday until I got on my feet again. This friend said that song, can't remember the singer.
Walk away really helped her. Gave her the insite to move on.
2007-01-25 15:46:05 · answer #2 · answered by Ruth 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to sit him down and talk to him. Tell him how you feel. Some guys can't express how they feel. If he treats you like a trophy girl and you don't like it. Tell him. He's not going to know unless you tell him. Use examples of how he does it. If he fixes it then he's trying. If not it will be a problem. Some guys are proud of thier women and treat them like a trophy girls. It's not in a disrespectful or degrogatory way and they are flattered by it. What do you mean share you with others? If you are in a relationship with him then you are with him. It should be just the two of you unless both of you consent to third parties. This I would be leery of for your kids. If he's taken to your kids it appears to me that he wants to play family without being a family! He wants to be daddy with the pretty house wife and no real commitment. Talk openly and honestly about what you want and where you want your relationship to go. 5 years is a long time to wait but what wouldn't we do for the right guy?
2007-01-25 15:57:55 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
#1 You have 2 kids you''re not a trophy.
#2 if you're over 30 and you've been with him for 5 years, yeah he's not comitting to jack squat. And he wants a 3 way, wow, yeah, he's never going to marry you.
#3 He's with you cause you're good in bed, and you might sleep with another chick.
2007-01-25 15:41:39 · answer #4 · answered by jz 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
And you're being a good role model to your 2 children.... how?
Do you want you son to grow up to be like him?
Do you want you daughter to be in a similar relationship?
He hasn't taken on your kids as his own if he hasn't married you- don't kid yourself. He plays daddy but has 0 responsibility.
Don't you and the kids deserve better? Only you can answer that.
2007-01-25 15:39:33 · answer #5 · answered by Violet Pearl 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If your looking for him to commit, I dont think it is going to happen. He is playing house with you, and loving it! It is wonderful that he seems to have "taken" on your children as his own, but there is much more it it than that. If he wants to be "daddy" then he needs to make that committment to you and your children.. marry you. Its really up to you, are you going to be satisfied 'playing house' or do you want more. Good Luck.
2007-01-25 15:45:15 · answer #6 · answered by A Soldiers Wife 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
U said it,, , u think he will never commit,, talk to him frankly and see what he'll say,, just talk not push,,
2007-01-25 15:35:24 · answer #7 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I get that too! I think you should move on!
2007-01-25 15:33:22 · answer #8 · answered by Celeste P 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋