she continues to say that he lives with his wife because he doesn't want to lose his kids or miss out on their childhood. I tell her not to get involved with that guy because if he really doesn't love his wife like HE SAYS then why live with her?? When she gets a phone call from him, all of us in the room have to be quiet and my sister says that it is because he doesn't want anyone to know that he is talking to her....why hide so much??? I believe that my sister is blinded by this man. She is in her mid-40's and he is 31 years old which isn't such a big deal....however, I do feel that if he had nothing to hide, then he'd just be with my sister and fight for visitation for his children. He takes my sister to dinner and to the movies all the time, however, he has to go home......doesn't something stink here???
2007-01-25 06:16:06 · 17 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
BY THE WAY, MY SISTER SAYS THAT THEY ARE JUST FRIENDS AND ONLY "TALK"....WHATEVER
2007-01-25 06:17:43 · update #1
yes something does.....
2007-01-25 06:20:07 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Here's how the story goes. Married man tells girlfriend how miserable he is and how he doesn't love his wife anymore. He is staying for the sake of the children. Married man's wife doesn't even know there is a problem and she carries on like one big happy family. Girlfriend is great for married man because he can have his cake and eat it, too. Girlfriend believes married man when he says he doesn't love his wife but each night he goes home to her, he tells her how much he loves her before and after he makes love to her. He has no intentions of leaving home and girlfriend must wait on the sidelines and wait for whatever scraps and leftovers married man offers her. Bottom line, your sister knows all of this and is obviously okay with it. Not your problem. Not your issue and not your concern. Thank God that you have a good head on your shoulders, strong personality and high self esteem and self respect. You won't ever be in such an empty place and the position of being used and used and used some more! Here's to YOU...Cheers! Strength and power is ours! Power to allow ourselves only the best which is what we deserve!
2007-01-25 06:32:54 · answer #2 · answered by enjoyrselves 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
i think your sister is being played, however, if she fancy's herself in love with the guy, nothing you or anybody else is going to say is going to change her mind.
i would not be afraid to bet that the wife is completely clueless about all this and truly beleives she has a good marriage.
send some flowers from the man to your sister, only give them his wife's address. this would be a mean thing to do, but the guy is a jerk and should be outed. this will do one of two things. 1. end the affair or 2. at least let the wife know what her husband is up to.
either way it should stir things up enough to let your sister see what is really happening.
2007-01-25 06:26:37 · answer #3 · answered by angel1 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I would suggest to your sister to think about what she is doing, and realize that she is hurting too many people. While he doesn't care about his children and his wife, because otherwise he wouldn't be messing around on them, she does understand that if she was in the position of the wife, and some other girl was sleeping with her husband, she wouldn't be too happy, and it would hurt like hell, and the fact that he says he doesn't want to lose them, well he will, when she finds out what a piece of crap he is!
2007-01-25 06:39:42 · answer #4 · answered by wantstoknow 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If your sister is in it only for sex(??) or companionship and attention and does not want to pursue it past that, then so be it. Not that I am condoning this, but she is an adult. "But", if she is looking for a relationship and is hoping this guy will leave his wife, then she is a fool, and is being played like a fiddle. On a very small percentage (very small) a guy "might" leave his wife for another woman (love), but for the most part, they never will.
2007-01-25 06:35:54 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Even if there is no sexual activity, there is romantic intent on both sides (otherwise there would be no need to hide it), so what they are doing is cheating. Even if he says he doesn't love his wife, he is too cowardly to face what he is doing. He needs to be honest with himself and with your sister, and stop playing with fire.
Your sister should have too much self-respect to be an accomplice to this... remind her that if he hasn't left his wife yet, he's probably not going to (and even if he did, how can you rely on a man who would cheat on one woman with another, since he could very well do the same to you?). She needs to walk away and keep reminding herself that there are plenty of fish in the sea... no need to raid someone else's pond.
2007-01-25 06:30:14 · answer #6 · answered by teresathegreat 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He should be "friends" and talking with his WIFE. He should be taking his wife to dinner and the movies. You're sister has no business having a relationship on this level with a man who is married. It shows a huge lack of self-respect on her part - I think the word for women who encourage married men in their unfaithful behaviors is: HOMEWRECKERS. So yes, something does stink here...Your Sister.
There's this thing that we women should all respect and take care of, it's called: SISTERHOOD. She is behaving in ways that are terribly harmful to a woman who has done NOTHING to her. What is wrong with your sister that she can't go get her own man?
Tell her to go get her own man and leave other women's husbands alone! She's in her mid-40's, she knows better! She is acting desperate, it's ridiculous that a woman her age hasn't come into her own yet and will lower herself to be used as trash by a married man.
2007-01-25 06:24:37 · answer #7 · answered by Marvelissa 4 · 1⤊ 2⤋
It seems to me that your sister is OK with being the other woman. Hopefully this is just a false that she is going through because she is tired of being alone. At times woman don't care who gives them the attention as long as she getting it. Why don't you try setting your sister up on dates with single available men.
2007-01-25 06:24:18 · answer #8 · answered by Melissa 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I don't think there's really a question here. You know the deal. And your sister does, too, whether or not she admits it. I sympathize, but she's a grown woman and is going to do what she wants. I assume you've told her what you think and that's all you can do.
2007-01-25 06:26:16 · answer #9 · answered by Angela B 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I feel sorry for his wife! You should put in an anonymous phone call to her, let her know what is going on, and tell her where she can find the two of them if she needs proof.
2007-01-25 06:20:37 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
She needs to find someone without all the problems. He is trying to have his cake and eat it too. If his wife finds out there will be a problem., Remind her of Scott peterson and what happened there!!
2007-01-25 06:25:15 · answer #11 · answered by Al B 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋