what can we do about it?
2007-01-25 05:21:48 · 13 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I have to say that from the very start of our relationship, I was my self. I put it all out there because I figured I didn't have much to lose at that point. I had been through a bad divorce and was pretty messed up. It was amazing that she accepted me just as I was and almost 6 years later we are still together. Neither one of us control the relationship. We have a true partnership and it is awesome. When both people are accepting of each other and their flaws, are best friends first, then a relationship can thrive and be great.
2007-01-25 05:29:58 · answer #1 · answered by vanhammer 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Men that are not looking to play games show there true self to a degree. Everyone puts there best foot forward when they are dating. Most men are not controlling. After all you can not control another person unless they give there control up and why would anyone want to do that. Take a look and make a list of the past people you were in a relationship with, list there qualities good and bad. You will be surprised to see how many are alike. You can then figure out why you are dating a certain type of man and go from there. Good Luck.
2007-01-30 03:37:18 · answer #2 · answered by Kat G 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Not just men, but people in general are afraid to show their "true" self, because we as a society are taught to believe that what people desire in a relationship, is something other than what we truly are. And thus, the game begins to be skinnier, better looking, smell better, have a closer shave, blonde instead of brunette, etc...ad nauseum.
The solution is a simple one. Everyone is born with free will. I suggest using it. Don't let a picture in a magazine or an ad on the television tell you what beautiful, or handsome, or desireable is. Don't let cheesy romance movies and dimestore novels tell you what romance is. Define all these things for yourself and start truly living as it was meant to be. Free and open minded enough to think outside the normal parameters of what is "acceptable".
I promise if everyone else did that, the world would be a helluva better place than it is now.
2007-01-25 05:33:24 · answer #3 · answered by genetic_traitor 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Yes there are those of us out here that quite frankly are exactly who we say we are from the word go. I myself have nothing to hide from anyone, now I am not on a first date going to bore someone to death with it but I will answer any question on anything. I treat women in general as I would like to be treated in return, i.e. with respect which everyone is owed. The number one reason men are perceived to be in control is that for the most part we are tasked with making decisions and then when ladies disagree they never speak out. If there is communication this never happens to either person because it can be discussed.
To over come anything between women and men the key is good honest solid communication, start there, it always works best, and then just remember to be honest.
2007-01-25 05:30:28 · answer #4 · answered by TXVyper 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
This is coming from a wife of two years now! And yes I have changed I don't do all the things that i did before we got married! alot of that stuff is true for us woman and men we just deal with the changes. I don't think that anyone is truly true from the start and god only knows why things change.. that is what i say!!!
2007-01-30 08:20:30 · answer #5 · answered by ? 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
All you can do is try to improve your skills to spot a liar. I am in a mess with a second husband because he LIED when I set him down in the beginning and said, "Let's discuss some issues and see if we are on the same page or not." and he lied about almost all of them.
I'm almost ready to hook them up to a lie detector when it seems it might turn serious if I EVER get near a man again.
2007-01-25 05:30:07 · answer #6 · answered by a_lot_smarter_now 4 · 2⤊ 1⤋
I wish there were! I sure don't know many. Then again most women are the same. Not many people are secure with who they are, or honest with themselves about who they are, to a point that they can show their true selves to other people.
2007-01-25 05:27:23 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
I dunno. I don't hide who I am. But I change. And depending on my mood at the time, I may appear differrently.
I would say, if anything, that I appear more skeptical and less confident than I really am when I first meet a new woman--mostly because if I think I might like them, that scares me a little (had some bad experiences). I am fine if I'm not thinking about dating them, however:)
2007-01-25 05:51:09 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
there is nothing you can do. some men do it and some dont. men do it to try to show off or make the girl like them so they can get them
2007-01-25 05:27:03 · answer #9 · answered by young grown man 4 · 2⤊ 1⤋
my husbands true colors didn't come out till i married him he was a lier , abusesive , and a cheater and controling
2007-01-30 07:32:05 · answer #10 · answered by sweetgranny06 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋