Should I be mad?

Question

My guy friend who I used to be romantically involved with, (not anymore, we decided to take it slow) doesnt show any effort.

whenever we see eachothers its b/c we run into eachother on campus, or b/c i go to his room. he doesnt call through out the day to say hello. he calls when ive asked him to take me places and hes ready, if he needs something, or because he hasnt seen me in a few days. besides that, thats the only time we see eachother or talk. it dint used to bother me b/c i hate being in my room alone. so id go see him or other friends. but since talkign about him to other friends, they brough to my attention that i do all the work.

i want to bring it up, but i feel like hell get mad. its like if somethigns not broken why fix it? our method works,but does he really care?

Answer 1

If it bothers you, then I would talk to him about it, although he probably won't get it. Just remember that it's not true that relationships of any kind are 50/50. Sometimes one person does have to make more effort than the other. It sounds like you didn't have a problem until others made you think you did. Think it through and if you feel the need tell him how you are feeling. True friends will at least be willing to listen and try to do better.

Answer 2

Well it sounds like you are hanging on to a romantic relationship, that does not exist anymore. If you do want to hang out with him, be straight forward about it. Believe me guys are no good at reading minds. If this friendship means anything to you, I would not bother with him for a bit and see what happens. Maybe he just needs his own space. You could be smothering him without knowing it. First you got to let go of the romantic side, and just be buddy's.

Answer 3

I was in this situation before. I had to move on because life is too short to wait for someone who maybe kind of interrested.

If you want to be friends, hang out at BBQ's meet up at the clubs, go to parties and have a good time.
Don't expect him to pick you up. He doesn't want the other girls to get the idea that you two are an item.
He is not going to get what he wants, your affection, so he needs to keep his options open.

Now if you want to be romantic with him, you need to tell him and work out what ever it is that is keeping you apart, and do it quickly. Otherwise you are simply wasting each other's time and energy.

Answer 4

you are lookin at this in the wrong way you still think you are datin if you are takin it slow, take it slow you dont have to call him everyday and he dosent have to call you everyday either, its good that he calls you every few days thats often enough, something tells me it was more his decision to take it slow than yours, and thats fine give him space to be your friend and not your boyfriend, in the end you should not be mad, and if not trying to be your friend go find another friend, after all you guys are just friends and you you already had that before he came along so dont make a big deal about it

Answer 5

So he was, and still is your guyfriend? Not boyfriend, as in you were not dating? It sounds like you guys are doing what you said you wanted to do, take it slow. He must care if he'll take you places when you ask. I would definately bring it up but figure out for yourself how you want it change. It sounds like you want it to be more structured like a dating relationship.

Answer 6

If he is the one who decided to "take it slow" then he just isn't interested in you anymore. If it was your idea then you're getting what you asked for?

Answer 7

Im not sure what you are trying to ask. To me is seems like you wanted to take it slow and that is what he is doing.

Answer 8

Maybe he doesn't think that your doing all the work? Maybe he considers he's doing his part in the friendship. Or he might just not be as close to you as he used to be, I'm not sure.

Answer 9

Move on with your lives. You aren't together anymore. Get over him and stop trying to hang out!