My mom knows I'm bi and have a girlfriend....but my father doesn't.
My mom says wait till I goto college to tell him.
Should I wait longer than that?
Or let him figure out on his own?
2007-01-25 05:06:35 · 11 answers · asked by Krissy K 2 in Society & Culture ➔ Cultures & Groups ➔ Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender
Is there a risk of him hearing about it (and defending your honor by denying it) from someone else? If so, then... there is something about (you) that he needs to know before you leave for college. Otherwise, consider your sexual disposition an intimate matter that is private and not an open topic for discussion.
If you do happen to decide to say something to him about it, try to have a few people from your vicinity, your community, in mind to remind him of...instead of naming celebrities who have no interest to him that are, too. That could enrage him to feel that your decision may have been influenced by the fame of others.
____
Homosexuality has not been considered a disorder by the American Psychiatric Association for > 3 decades. About 4 to 5% of the population identify themselves as exclusively homosexual for their entire lives. Like heterosexuality, homosexuality results from complex biologic and environmental factors leading to an ability to become sexually aroused by people of the same sex. Like heterosexuality, homosexuality is not a matter of choice.
________ Excerpted from first source below:
Also, do not presume his reaction. He may be comfortable with the concept; it is much more accepted now than when he was your age. Perhaps 'he' is in the closet, too. Perhaps the life that your parents have is a sham; and, it will be a great relief to him to learn that you are accepting of it...so that he may divorce your mother and live with his secret lover without the shame that he had feared of your intolerance to it. Who knows? It could happen.
Take care...be safe...and live your life as you choose to live it. It is yours -- not theirs. If they are proud of you for your accomplishments instead of your sexual orientation, they will continue to appreciate what you do in life.
2007-01-25 05:27:01 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
u should tell him. it might hurt him 2 kno that ur bi, but it will hurt him more if he learns it on his own for from someone else. be honest with him and do it soon cuz if u wait until u go 2 college, then that's like running away and nothing will get resolved.
2007-01-25 13:18:51 · answer #2 · answered by blewboy333 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
take it from me....wait til you are out of the house, especially if that's soon! i came out in highschool and it was the most miserable time of my life with my parents. definitely wait. although, who knows, he may already have an idea, and don't say anything until he does....
i know it sucks, but it's better in the long run
2007-01-25 13:26:35 · answer #3 · answered by Taken by a Texan 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Come out whenever you want to have an honest relationship with your father and want to stop pretending to be someone you're not.
2007-01-25 15:10:29 · answer #4 · answered by carora13 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you're financially dependant upon your father to go to college, keep your mouth shut!! He may be upset and cut you off.
2007-01-25 13:24:52 · answer #5 · answered by kerrisonr 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
depends. will he pull the college money?
but it will get out eventually. how does he feel about bi ppl?
2007-01-25 13:24:59 · answer #6 · answered by implosion13 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why would you need to tell him at all. It is not really his business. Unless your parent is saying are you gay or when are you getting married, then why would you need to tell them.
2007-01-25 13:31:05 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Let him figure it out on his own.
2007-01-25 13:15:50 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
When you have your own place.
2007-01-25 13:17:28 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think the sooner the better.
2007-01-25 13:15:17 · answer #10 · answered by CL R 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋