get my mum to 'let go of me'.
Im 18, and my mum and I always used to be so close....I have a boyfriend (3years). My mum finds it so hard to let go...she says its because she loves n cares for me so much....but that doeasnt help, because her ways are pushing us apart! she goes through my underware draws....reads leeters that people have written me...goes through my stuff. she then says that |I have caused her so much stress, but if she didnt go searching for all these things....she wouldnt have the stress!...Have any advice?????
2007-01-25 01:49:37 · 11 answers · asked by little_millsey 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
It will not be easy (remember you are still Mum's little girl to her) but you need to sit down, calmly, woman to woman.
Point out that you still love her but that you are an adult now.
Admit that you may make mistakes...all of us are fallible...but that you must now be allowed to make youir own mistakes, and carry the consequences.
Tell her, gently but firmly, that she should not read your mail and that you find it distressing.
Say that you will listen to her advice, but in the end you must make your own decisions as you are the one who will have to live with them
When, in 25 years time, you face this situation...remember!!
2007-01-25 02:54:28 · answer #1 · answered by alan h 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You ned to have words with her about going through your stuff , it is out of order. I know how you feel , my parents were the same . As for the mail , what I did was open my parents' mail , rip it up and leave it lying around . They soon got the message !
2007-01-25 02:02:42 · answer #2 · answered by strapping6footer 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need your mum for her parental guidance but this has become rather suffocating and irritating. Draw your lines of privacy and keep them. Keep a lock on your door and drawers.
2007-01-25 02:57:49 · answer #3 · answered by violeo 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'd go away for a few days and then see how she copes. Then when you go back, have a chat and say you needed to go away to have some space. She'll have missed you like mad while you were away and hopefully this will make her realise how bad she is.
2007-01-25 01:54:40 · answer #4 · answered by dadn33 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
tell her she must stop going through your personal things how would she like it if u went through her private things and if she stops doing it then tell her u will sit down and listen to what she has to say but dont do it in an aggresive mood be nice about it and see what happens.
2007-01-28 12:15:52 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Are you sure you dont do anything to make her worry and act this way? Parents are usually protective, and I think she just wants to make sure you are safe. Once you have a child you will probably act like this too.
2007-01-25 01:58:45 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If your an only child then It would be harder but you should tell her you have privacy and need space your gonna grow up anyways so why is she doing all that stuff?
2007-01-25 02:39:04 · answer #7 · answered by UndeadNitemare 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
tell her you love her, thank her for everything she does for you... but move out! Or at least lay out some ground rules for your own independence.
She obviously loves you, but hopefully she will understand you are growing up.
2007-01-28 08:46:16 · answer #8 · answered by K F 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
MOVE OUT!
If it were me i would move out, but keep in contact, dont alienate your mum, but stand up for youself!
GOOD LUCK!!
2007-01-25 15:57:23 · answer #9 · answered by Smokey 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
put a lock on your bedroom door so she cant go in and snoop!
2007-01-25 01:55:50 · answer #10 · answered by sweetness 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋