About 2 months ago my husband of 3 years lost his mother in a car accident.At the time I was overseas in the UK working on a business deal.He asked me to fly back but when I tried explaining to him that I had to stay for another 2 weeks to close this huge deal he hung up on me.I've been back for 6 weeks now and things have been very strained between us.I hate this and if I can't make him understand I'll have no choice but to leave him.How do I get through to him?
2007-01-24 23:31:36 · 13 answers · asked by myobsessionisyoualways 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Your husband's mother died unexpectedly and you didn't come right home to be with him?
You were COMPLETELY in the WRONG! That was an awful thing you did. Have you no compassion for your life-partner? How could you be so cold-hearted?
You may never be able to fix this with him. What you did is virtually unforgivable.
2007-01-24 23:36:12 · answer #1 · answered by kja63 7 · 5⤊ 0⤋
So a business deal was more important than your husband and his loss!?!? What the hell were you thinking?!?!?
First off, a job is a job and another can be found. Second, you could have had someone else close this deal while you went home to be with your husband in his time of need. Third, you need to get your head out of your a**!!!
Honestly, I think that he should leave you and not the other way around. You are cold-hearted and not very bright. There is nothing for him to understand, but maybe you need to understand what you did to him was unforgivable.
2007-01-25 07:41:48 · answer #2 · answered by Boo Boo Head 4 · 5⤊ 0⤋
I don't think you can make him understand. He needed you and you more or less told him your business deal was more important than him. Sorry I'm on his side. What you did was cold and unfeeling. You were wrong. It seems you're the one that doesn't understand. Now you talk about leaving him because he's hurt and giving you the cold shoulder. I don't blame him. There is always another business deal and someone else could have taken over for you. There won't be another time he'll need you like he did when his mom died. Talk to him and ask his forgiveness.
2007-01-25 07:46:05 · answer #3 · answered by mjm52 4 · 5⤊ 0⤋
You don't appear to be to into this marriage. I mean any business partner or employer would have granted you leave to come home to deal with this family crisis. You put money, and your career over your own life's partner's needs.
How could you do this to someone you supposedly love? The flight home, attendance at the funeral, and flight back to the UK at most would have taken 3 to 4 days tops.
I know one thing, your husband know's now that he and his needs are of no importance to you. You are nothing more than a selfish, self-centered, spoiled-rotten ******.
Get your butt out of this man's life so he can move on and be happy, no one deserves to have something like you cluttering up there life.
2007-01-25 08:05:29 · answer #4 · answered by michael_trussell 4 · 4⤊ 1⤋
You could not postpone your business for the death of your mother in law ! ? ! ?
Way to be there for him. You are lucky to have him because were it me, after the funeral I would have moved every stitch of your personal possessions out of my house and changed the locks.
OH that's right he did that, only metaphorically. His heart is not locked to you. You are right you cannot make him understand
why you would do that to him. You will NEVER make him understand.
Did you close that very important deal? If you did it was because you did not explain what happened to your customer. There is no way I do business with a person who exhibits such blatantly poor judgment.
Remember this when you are alone on your death bed. No person ever says I wish I'd spent more time working.
Your transgression here is worse than infidelity. You do not seem to understand that.
2007-01-25 08:04:55 · answer #5 · answered by Flagger 6 · 3⤊ 1⤋
It's a hard call as my husband didn't attend my late fathers funeral due to our business and he wouldn't close the shop that day. I felt a grudge about that for a long time as the loss of one's parent brings the need for your spouse for support and measures very highly on the emotion scale. Money comes and goes and you can't take it with you. I guess you will have to sort it out with your partner ultimately.
2007-01-25 07:39:12 · answer #6 · answered by friendly face 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
You weren't there for him in his time of need. Jobs come and go. You were looking for a job when you found that one. Never put a job before family. If you cannot agree with this, you will never get through to him.
2007-01-25 07:54:19 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
by now the abuse you got should tell you that you were in the wrong and should re-examine your priorities. however, as to your question, I really think you better off apologizing and talking things out and even going to marriage counseling. If you truly want to leave him for this situation, he (and you) are probably both better off apart imo
2007-01-25 08:23:32 · answer #8 · answered by jim06744 5 · 1⤊ 1⤋
yaah sometimes things happen soo fast that u dont know what to do.what has happenned has happened.be good to ur partner and show him that u really love him and are really sorry.u wanna leave him,let me tell u something , the person whom u think dosent need u, needs u the most........just think about it.
good luck.
2007-01-25 07:42:05 · answer #9 · answered by kudos_009 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
you may have to leave in order for him to understand. you already tried explaining to him. why bother continuing? i'm sure of the shoe was on the other foot he would not leave his business deal either.
2007-01-25 07:49:15 · answer #10 · answered by cfalways 5 · 0⤊ 2⤋