Have the MARRIAGE VOWS been changed to read "UNTIL IT IS NOT FUN OR TOO HARD OR I AM TIRED OF IT?

Question

I'll have to ask the priest and the rabbi about that. That is what it sounds like based on these boards.
I "fell out of love," I "was bored," "my spouse had some problem (that could be addressd with patience, therapy or treatment but "hey, I didn't sign up for this," I "wanted to go in a new direction, children be damed," I "felt trapped," "my husband didn't make enough money," "my wife didn't give me enough sex like before ( even though I didn't bring her flowers like before, help around the house or call during the day just to chat or talk to her without distraction for ten minutes a day anymore either" Maybe I missed that change.

Answer 1

Yeah i think ive heard of that!!!

Have u heard the one of:"I JUST COULDNT GET IT UP FOR MY WIFE SO I SORT FOR ANOTHER WOMEN??"

Yeah i actually was a witness to that one!!!

the bonds of marriage has disintergrated from generation to generation-what is the real thing these days...

Answer 2

I'd say you're oversimplifying it. I believe people change, don't you? Couples let life's events come between them. Jobs, money, homes, and even kids can drive a wedge between a couple that can be hard to repair, if at all. The reasons / excuses you list are how people feel and that cannot be changed. It's the way they feel, influenced by life. Don't forget, someone who "fell out of love" may not have had much of a lover, or lost one completely over time. Believe me, I know. Ever been married to someone on Meth? How about someone who beats the crap out of you regularly? Do you think they did this stuff from the get - go? Not everything can be fixed and you have to save yourself. Money and sex are big issues and are major contributors to the happiness of a couple. It can't be summarily dismissed. Why would you bring flowers to someone who's mean to you? What I'm trying to say is there's two sides to every story. You only get one shot at this life, and everyone deserves to do what it takes to be as happy as you can in it. But I'm glad to see there's people like you who have the cut and dried answer to everything.

Answer 3

I've wondered the same thing a few times and I'm not even married yet. I think its a case of people not being bothered to try and work things out so they take the easy option and just call it a day instead! Some people just expect things to work out and don't put in any effort or time to make things work at the end of the day you only get out of a relationship what you put into it. Yes there are times when calling it a day is the best option but only after you know you've done all you can to sort out any problems and work through them and it still isnt working.

Answer 4

Well I don't know about you but those aren't the vows I took.
My husband although not perfect never has been and I like that. He drives me crazy and doesn't pick up around the house no more or bring me flowers but I don't mind that either. He loves me and supports me and although he doesn't tell me everyday I see it everyday in a glimpse or a smile. Our marriage although still young is great. Maybe some people just use this site as a venting session to out there frustrations instead of taking it out on their beloved.

Answer 5

Marriage truly is hardwork. It takes a lot more than simply what our idealistic minds term as "love". It takes committment, determination, patience, forgiveness, understanding, selflessness, and scrafice. Since I have been married, and have experienced a few struggles in my own marriage, I now know why when we hear of people who have been married 50 years they deserve a standing ovation. The countless battles they must have fought to get there. The many times it must have been easier to leave then to stay, but they chose to stay anyway. The many times they must've questioned what "love" really means and found that it is not always self-gratification and is not always beautiful. But... in the end, after 50 years, you've been witness to eachother's lives, you have shared it all -- and you have your true companion. Your soldier that never gave up, though the option was always there. And time after time, they never relinquished the fight.

Only very few will see the sweetness of this success. I pray that me and my husband will be one of them.

Answer 6

The vows didn't change, People did. Kids seem to have grown up without being able to commit or communicate. It is going to get worse.
Even before marraige, look at the relationships going around - 1 week on and 1 week off, or, open relationships.
I just hope that my kids grow up to actuallt be stable enough to have the courage of their convictions!

Answer 7

No, the vows did not change...however people have come to realize that life is very short, and to spend it in a miserable, unhappy or fearful (in cases of abuse) way...is wasting a gift that God gave us...the gift of life. Most marriages end over abuse, neglect, and infidelity...so when one partner breaches the vow to "love, honor and cherish and forsaking all others", by abusing or cheating...then the other person is free to go as the vow was already broken by the partner

Answer 8

I have been married 15 years and am still very madly in love with my husband. It's not out of luck but out of hard work. What has challenged our marriage in the past, we have worked through and it has made us stronger. People give up too easily, definitely!

Answer 9

It was one out of every three, now is every other couple that marries end up in divorce. Would you rather have these people be unhappy and make their partner unhappy for the rest of their lives and make everybody else around them miserable? Not me, that's why I'm getting a divorce myself.

Answer 10

blah blah blah blah blah! im soo mad right now! vows are vows! dont say them damn vows if u dont mean em! end of story! infatuation--->lasts only a few months! after its gone...your spouse thinks oh crap i made a mistake! thats freaking great! all im saying is that to all unmarried people out ther---> DONT SAY I MR.CRAZY/MRS.CRAZY TAKE BLAH BLAH BLAH , TO HAVE AND TO HOLD, FOR BETTER AND FOR WORSE, IN SICKNESS AND IN HEALTH TILL DEATH DO US PART! PLEEEEASE I DONT CARE IF YOURE SCARED OF BEING ALONE, IF YOU NEED FINANCIAL STABILITY, WHATEVER YOUR DAMN REASONS ARE DONT SAY EM IF U DONT MEAN IT! OK?