help! myDadDiedAboutAYearAgo,AfterHeDiedMyMomStartedToSpendTimeWithHer"friend"AtSomePointSheEndedUpFightingWit

Question

my grandma(her mother) because of that man. after around 6 months my dad died, & after my grandma went back to her country, my mom started to spend more time with this man, at some time she wouldnt get home until 3am and she would lie about it, she'd say that she got home earlier. I moved out of my house to attend college( i'm 12 hours away),and the day after I had move, that man was already living in our apartment(i knew this was going to happen cause she needs the money ad she had told me that she was going to rent this man a room) I wasnt ok with it but I knew she needed that money since I couldnot longer help her with the rent, but what I was really surprised is that she put him in MY BED, for God sake's could he not have bring his own bed?. now the situation is this she plans to marry him(she says is hard to live by herself and my 2 younger brothers), when I went back home for xmas i asked her if she liked him and she said yes,I'm not happy w this since he hurt my dad when alive.

Answer 1

Sometimes the best thing you can do to make a person question their own actions is to give them unquestioning support. When she sees your actions aren't really logical- because u hate the guy- it will make her have to asses the situation and come up with the hard answers. My mom did it to me all the time, so I know it works! There's nothing like a guilt trip...

Answer 2

this is tough, i feel for you, whats up with putting him in your bed if they are so close, don't they sleep together. your mother should make it more comfortable for you when she comes home. she has all ready been careless and had to many kids, more than she can care for, she is not responsible, now she depends on a man to help her out with the money. just stay on track, save what money you can, help your mother out when you can but you have your own life now, concentrate on how you are going to take care of your self because your mom and this guy are not going to make it comfortable for you. take care of your self and be in complete control of your own life. your mother has made her life what it is.