what are 10 things you should ask yourself before you get married?

Question

Is it normal to have doubts in yourself??

Answer 1

1) What are my partners faults?
2) Can I live with these faults for the rest of my life? (Don't plan on changing them.)
3)Can you forgive the small stuff? The big stuff?
4) Do you both follow the same principles of money management?
5) Do you agree about or open to change your opinion about children?
6) Do you share the same values, ideals, and beliefs about religion?
7)I'm sure you love this person, but do you like them? Do you enjoy their company, even during mundane times of life?
8) Do they treat you with respect and dignity? Violence or abuse (verbal, emotional,sexual, or physical) is NEVER acceptable.
9)When you argue, do you argue calmly and fairly? Or do you scream, yell, name call, and air dirty laundry?
10)Are you and your partner ready to stay committed to each other- no matter what?
11)Are you ready to stop looking for that mythical "ideal" "perfect" partner out there? (No one is perfect.) However, you partner, while not perfect may be "perfect for you."

everyone has doubts. I don't know what you are doubting. hopefully this list helps.

I believe in the principle of "micro-forgiveness".
Many people fight over little things like toilet seats, quirks, and oversights. But over time, these little irks can become the little mice that gnaw away at a relationship. Forgive and forget about these small things quickly and they will never become a problem.

Blessings and good luck.

Answer 2

Yes, it is normal to have some doubts. Marriage is a big step if you take it seriously. It is meant to be for keeps, not broken off as soon as the times get tough. All marriages have rocky areas that need to be worked through. The biggest and most important question is do you respect him/her enough to be willing to accept them for who they really are? (You never find out who they are until the honeymoon wears off) Do you respect yourself and feel that you deserve to be treated well? You must love yourself (not in a conceited way) before you can truly love and accept someone else. Are you willing to compromise? If you cant do it now, you won't do it then.
Can you see yourself growing old with this person? Will you still love him/her when the hair is grey and the face wrinkled and the chest falls to the waistline etc?

Answer 3

It's always normal to have some doubt but it depends on what. Here are my suggestions:
1. Do I like my potential spouse? (notice I said like)
2. Can I see myself with this person in 5, 10, 20. 50 years?
3. What do I like about our relationship?
4. What do I dislike about our relationship?
5. Am I physically attracted to this person? (yes it matters)
6, Do I trust him/her with my life, finances, feelings?
7. Am I happy now?
8. Does the thought of being in his/her arms make me happy or hurl?
9. Do I have any feelings of disatisfaction when conversing with this person?
10. Do I believe that he/she loves me?

I think these are very important things to reflect on in no particular order. Again cold feet is very normal but be careful to know the difference between cold feet and having doubts that are warranted. If you really aren't sure you want to be married to this person talk to a friend who has your best interest at heart and knows you and the situation to get some more personal feedback.

Answer 4

It is totally normal to have doubt!! It's called wedding jitters!! But the ten things you should think about:
1) Can you wake up to his face everyday for the rest of your life?
2) Do you agree on religion?
3) Do you want to have children?
4) Do you have good communitcation?
5) Does he get along with your family and vice versa?
6) Are you both honest and loyal to one another?
7) Are there cultural differences?
8) What are the marriage and divorce laws in your state?
9) Do you both have similar goals?
and last but not least
10) Are you in love each other?

Answer 5

Yes this is very normal okay my 10 questions are
1. Am I ready to marry?

2. Do i love him?

3. What are my intentions or reasons for marrying him?

4. Am i ready for this kind of commitment?

5. Will God be the center of my marriage?

6. Am i really ready to honestly say the vows and stick by them no matter what til death do us part?

7. Is he God's will for my life and will i be a praying wife?

8. Is he the right one for me?

9. Will I be the wife i need to be for and to him?

10? Do i love him unconditionally for the right reasons and am I getting married for the right reasons?

If the answers to all these are yes then I am ready for the marriage.

Answer 6

Do I have ambitions and goals and moving forward, or am I stuck in the same old place in life?
Is she?
Do I have enough character to be willing to make changes where I need to change?
Does she?
Do I blame others for my mistakes and shortcomings, or can I take responsibility for my own actions?
Does she?
DO I "need" a wife to make me feel complete, or am I complete enough as a person so I can give of myself to make her life happy. (If you "need" a wife to make you happy, you are not ready. that puts to much of a demand on her.)
Do we have the same goals and beliefs about God, raising children, schooling for the kids, discipline, money management or where you want to be in 5 years?
Is she what you want in a mother for your kids? Do you want a "stay at home mom"? Is that what she wants? Are you in agreement on these things?
Are you willing to commit for life to doing what it takes to stay together even thru the rough times, or will you cop out when the going gets rough? What about her? Are you done playing the field? Is she? Does either of you still have an emotional attachment to an old boy/girl friend? Is your job or money going to be more important than your relationship with your mate?
Love is not a "feeling", it is a choice to be committed to another person. Hope these help. :)

Answer 7

You shouldn't have to ask 10 things because you would already know..of course you learn new things everyday.. but Don't do it if your having serious doubts. you shouldn't have to convince yourself to get married.

Answer 8

VERY NORMAL.
This is a huge decision and one that will impact you for the rest of your life.
I dont know what the top ten questions are (they would vary alot from person to person)
but mine would be
1. can I see myself with this man for the REST OF MY LIFE
2. are we of the same faith/ belief system
3. where does he want to be in ten years/where do I want to be in ten years and can we make that journey together (if he wants to be in a rock band and you want to be a housewife this may not work)
4. If you want kids, would he make a good father to them (if he already has kids and angry children's mothers in the background, this could be a problem)
5. Does he have earning potential (if he dropped out of school and has no real plan to make money, you are going to be miserable no matter how good the sex is)
6. who are his friends (birds of a feather tend to flock together....if his friends are ex cons' you wont be very happy if you dont enjoy being around these kinds of people)

Answer 9

1. why?
2. when?
3. Am I ready?
4. Why her?
5. Am I crazy?
6. Is she crazy?
7. What am I doing?
8. Is she rich?
9. Is it her bod?
10. Will someone be around to talk me out of it?

Answer 10

of course.
you're pretty much starting a new life.
& making a lifelong promise.


1.prenup or not?
2.std/hiv testing?
3.do i love them?
4.stability? (job, house,etc.)
5.kids?
6.will this work??? (compatibility)
7.do i known a lot about lover? (quizzes to test this available on internet...)
8.sexual, appearance, personality attraction? (you make the decision)
9.am i ready to start life??? love everyday,etc.
10.WILL THIS LAST...? or am i moving too fast.