What does it make you think of? What is it about? is it nicely written?
Her face showed no sign of the emptiness she felt, her broken heart was hidden under layers of lies that she herself had spun.
Starved for attention and craving the love she never had, the girl lost her self in a sea of false hopes and rejection, her cry’s for attention were ignored by the ones she loved most, her silent crying was never heard and her anger of the hatred she had received, had always received, was taken out on herself, people envied her, but no one felt the hurt she felt, never cried as much as she cried, never was rejected so many times. She had tried so many times for there attention, plea’s for love and care, desperate, dangerous acts that were ignored by the ones she needed to be seen by, she hurt inside, but no one cared.
2007-01-24 15:24:15 · 8 answers · asked by made_up_cinderella 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
my friend wrote this by the way, i was just wondering what other people think, she wants to enter it into this short story comp. dyou think it sucks or is it good?
2007-01-24 15:35:12 · update #1
Text wise.....not good! Several run-on sentences and incomplete thoughts!
Writer has to think more in the head of a reader.
I had to backtrack several times to comprehend.
Purely critical of text.
Good luck!
2007-01-24 15:52:24 · answer #1 · answered by CSnumber1 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like someone is hurting inside but nobody is noticing. It's a way to ask for help or for someone to be there for him or her or care. Whom ever sent this needs a friend right now. Let that person know that you are there if they ever need to talk or a shoulder to cry on.
2007-01-24 23:30:10 · answer #2 · answered by littleredd1003 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Its not bad writing.
It's typical "emo"
cool but scary that she opened up
try to verify if it is just a story or her life.
very typical of someone who has been emotionally and/or physically abused.
The Who's opera Tommy comes to mind
"the bad man song".
And the book "a boy called it"
If she loved me, I would worry about her emotional state and that she loved being in the state of being in love than knowing wheather or not she loved me.
I would worry that she was suicidal.
honest thoughts.
2007-01-25 00:01:51 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like it is from a person who needs help building up her self esteem and get away from those who have hurt her and devlop new friends who can support her and fill that emptiness. I hope that isn't how you feel!!
2007-01-24 23:32:44 · answer #4 · answered by Al B 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
wow that's deep. First u must love yourself & if God wanted u here u have a purpose & should love & live life & figure out what will make u happy again. Do not do anything harsh please .
2007-01-24 23:31:16 · answer #5 · answered by pammybear1971 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Is that written by you? Not good .
2007-01-24 23:33:02 · answer #6 · answered by 12know 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
explains almost all of what i feel inside
2007-01-24 23:32:16 · answer #7 · answered by haringmarumo 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
wow
2007-01-24 23:29:27 · answer #8 · answered by nicki 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋