I met my best friend nearly four years ago. From the very beginning we hit it off and became really close friends. She told me from day one that she was bisexual but this wasn't an issue for me. Me on the other hand...I'm a heterosexual woman, divorced and up until recently did not even have the fantasy of some women to explore with another woman. As time passed, some sort of attraction developed between us, I couldn't understand why as I had never been attracted to another woman and considered myself heterosexual. However, the fact that I felt attracted to her stopped being the main issue in this whole thing. The fact that she was my best friend and how this would affect our friendship was my main worry. We kissed on a couple of occasions and then pretended that nothing happened. We went through lots of things together that drew us close, until one day we threw caution to the wind and started an affair.We fell in love but soon realized it was not what we wanted.It really hurts
2007-01-24 08:48:05 · 18 answers · asked by Lorena C 2 in Society & Culture ➔ Cultures & Groups ➔ Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender
It sounds like you need to talk to your friend, if you're hurting I'll bet she is too. If it is that you have decided that it's not what you want, what's to stop you from still being the fantastic friends you've always been? If you fall in love with your best friend and they reciprocate and everything is great then okay; but don't forget lovers can come and go but true friends are always there. My girlfriend, way before she met me, went through the same thing; Met a girl became friends, thought they wanted more, found it all too wierd so stayed just friends. They're still best friends now even though it was wierd for a while.
Hang in there, if you're friendship is as strong as it sounds, I'm sure it can withstand this.
Good luck girl! x
2007-01-30 22:34:48 · answer #1 · answered by Karen S 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
By the sounds of it you are bisexual, I think that there is a lot more bi-sexual women out there, but because of stigma over being gay especially if you are a woman and the desire to have children, women feel that they can't show this side of their character. Your friend may however not be the right person for you, but one thing this relationship has taught you, is that you do have feeling for women and that you can and may have a relationship in the future with another woman again. It may hurt you that the relationship is over, but you now have more potential partners, just think that now you can go out with women and maybe what you liked about your girl friend was the female approach to a physical relationship.
2007-01-24 09:46:39 · answer #2 · answered by mellouckili 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I really feel for you, something very similar happened to me......
So you started an affair and realised it was not what you wanted. Do you think the two of you would be better as just friends? If you do there's nothing that's stopping you from trying to get things the way they were before. It sounds like the two of you had a really special friendship and i know there's like this rule that you can't go back to being friends after being more than friends BUT that's just a rule........If you are meant to be friends you will be friends.
2007-01-24 09:02:53 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
If youre a girl, tell her. If youre a guy and wanna stay her friend, dont tell her. She's a lesbian and shes going to be a lesbian whether or not you tell her.
2016-05-24 05:15:50 · answer #4 · answered by Susan 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you fell in love...then what was the problem? Or were you tryin not to be a "lesbian" and that's why it didn't work? If it doesn't work only time will mend your broken heart. Does she feel the same? What are you guys scared of? If you remain best friends you may continue to hurt if you see her w/another person. So time my friend time.... Otherwise if y'all love each other..then maybe it was meant to be!?
2007-01-24 09:23:10 · answer #5 · answered by tr95 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Love has no eyes. It can not tell who you love or why you love. I truly feel that being in love is beautiful. I am a Lesbian an have loved my girl for 8 years. I love her for all the things that make her who she is.
She is my best friend and I love her with all my heart. If you are close enough you will be able to stay great friends.
2007-01-24 09:04:01 · answer #6 · answered by sweet candy 2 · 3⤊ 0⤋
you sound a bit confused. straight,bi or lesbian,friends sometimes have sex and realize it was a mistake. don't risk the friendship. most people usually have strong feelings with their first after finding out how much they enjoy it. woman especially. just try to be friends only and find another woman for the sex. if something more becomes of you and your friends relationship,don't fight it. no shame in being with women.
2007-01-24 08:58:36 · answer #7 · answered by b 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you can still love your friend with out being with her sexually. in fact she most likely wants you to love her still, but she knows its not right to be girl friends, remember if you don't want to be with her. don't interfere with her love live, because its only a matter of time and she will find another girl that's nice, and soft to kiss and be close to. you should stay close and be good friends because you shared something very special. and just see what happens. you never no you might get back together.
2007-01-24 09:44:58 · answer #8 · answered by devil weed 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i think i am going to pack it in for tonight. i don't understand how people can take advantage of others when they are at their lowest. u know, when someone is sick and can't fight for his promised wife and someone uses that as an opening because she would have been vulnerable too. man. i have seen the best and the worst in people over the last year. gee, that was a tough one, i am disappointed anna. i am sure u noticed the deeper we fell in love the more u smelty cat piss and the rationing of food - not rockety science. ok, u two have a great night. thank you for tellimg me 10 months later - lol. nite all.
2007-01-24 09:11:58 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Love can be heartbreakin but just tell her how u feel, tell her u dont want to mess this up.
Dont let sexuality come between u and her u can always b friends.
If it;s a boy tryn to get u I understand but for u two, fight for this to work . Share ur emotions and feelins with eachother it mite work.
2007-01-24 09:57:52 · answer #10 · answered by Pocahantas 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋