I don't understand why, in lesbian relationships, there are "male" and "female" roles, still. I would have thought that if you wanted to be with a woman.. you would both be "women" in the relationship? And is it true that the person that has the role of the "male" is the "giver", and not the "receiver"?
2007-01-24 07:19:16 · 10 answers · asked by Katherine L 2 in Society & Culture ➔ Cultures & Groups ➔ Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender
When I mentioned "male" and "female" roles, I wasn't referring to one's appearance.. I've just been told by people that one of the women in the relationship tend to take on a male role in terms of "giving", while the other partner maintains the "female" role, in terms of receiving - where I would have thought both partners would be equal. And on that note, I've heard the same in terms of male/male relationships as well.
2007-01-24 07:57:01 · update #1
Some women are male oriented.
I can't remember right now what they are called other than stone butch or something like that.
It just means they identify as male mentally. They dress and behave in a masculine fashion.
It can go either way with the giving and receiving sexually thing. Yes, some hard butches don't want to be touched i.e. having their breasts caressed or being gone down on. This is obviously to do with the suppression of the feminine side and feminine physical characteristics. Most of the women strap down their breast and some even wear strap-ons for non sexual purposes (the look).
Women who would become their partners obviously find this attractive.
Bare in mind there are exceptions to every rule.
Daddy's are similar in outward appearance but I think are more open to mutual sexual interactions.
If you really examine couples in general (including heteros) you will find the gender role playing my not be so prevalent but the dominance role can easily go in any direction. There is often a dominant personality in a relationship but usually the happiest couples strike a balance so that different situations causes or allows dominance to be shifted. And sex is just sex. It's whatever you in the mood for at the moment as far as who's on top.
The different sects of lesbian society don't overlap that much.
Much like the guys have leather bars or the pap bear baby bear thing women have similar groupings. You won't find the gamor dykes hanging out at the smae club the Daddy's or the ultra butches do. Pretty much just at gay pride festivals and such do we all get together.
Just like you may or may not hang out at a country western bar but prefer a hip hop club or rock&roll bar. People follow the "birds of a feather" principle.
2007-01-24 07:51:43 · answer #1 · answered by octopussy 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Its not that way in all lesbian relationships, my girlfriend may wear mens clothes but she is very much a women. . . She doesnt act like a guy. . . there are plenty of times when both women are fem. . .thats hot! I dont believe that the "person that has the role of the male is the giver," is true. . it goes both ways (at least in my experience) we both do the same things to each other. .
2007-01-24 15:47:54 · answer #2 · answered by sweet_treat101 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
That's not true of all relationships. It depends on the couple. For example my last relationship was with a woman and if you saw us separately you wouldn't know our sexual orientation unless we told you. We both gave equally to the relationship and there were no assigned roles.
2007-01-24 15:28:05 · answer #3 · answered by Broken hearted 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
That doesn't describe all relationships. But in many relationships/couples/teams you'll find different personality styles that complement one another. It's not so much about one being a "male" but rather the qualities we associate with maleness. A very "male" person naturally complements a very "female" person regardless of gender.
2007-01-24 15:29:14 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
This is not true and is offensive to some gay ppl. Outsiders who are straight think this is so but this is totally crazy. PPL assume because I am taller and bigger and have a "tom-boyish" personality that I'm in some kind of male role and this is stupid, to me. Me and my gf are women,love women, and there is nothing male about us or how we live. We give equal to each other and make each other happy.
2007-01-24 15:30:21 · answer #5 · answered by Noclue 3 · 0⤊ 2⤋
That is way to stereotypical, most of the lesbian couples i know are both feminine. Or both quite masculine. It really varies from relationship to relationship.
2007-01-24 15:44:53 · answer #6 · answered by kringle 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
i dun agree with that.
both party have to give in a relationship,
it keeps the relationship to go strong.
Nobody will like it if he/she gives alot to the gf/bf n not getting anything in return.
And well, I'm femme, and i'm more attracted to femme girls and if i were to find a girl whom i like, i'd like both of us to be the "girl" role.
2007-01-24 15:41:46 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
ya i know what you mean i have seen a lesbian couple and one dressed like a man but could tell she was a woman because she had boobs its really weird i know
2007-01-24 16:00:02 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Not every relationship is like that.. Mine sure isnt. But some may like butchy girls thats fine.. who cares what every makes them happy!!!
2007-01-24 15:58:37 · answer #9 · answered by Erin 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
That's not true of most relationships.
2007-01-24 15:25:16 · answer #10 · answered by lcraesharbor 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋