A little advice for the ladies. Take this for what its worth.?

Question

I watched on the news this morning about all these single woman that got it going on, money, car, house, everything, but have no love. NO mate.. The news went on to talk about the insecurities of a man when dealing with a successful woman. And mentioned this is probably the reason so many woman are single. As, a man the news said what I had known all along. Remember, men like to feel powerful, and like they are protectors of woman and bread winners. So, when you got everything - men can feel less and a bit insecure. They wonder where they fit in - if she got everything.
They want somone they can work with, not someone thats got it all figured out. Comments?

I don't have numbers, but the study showed that the most successful woman were also the most single woman.

abfabmom - gonna be single for a long long time. Someday, you'll get it.. LOVE IS LIFE! Its not about what you got.

Justin - what you describe will be the downfall of the west

Answer 1

Sooo...what you are saying is that these women are "unlovable" as is, and should "dumb it down" in order to fit a man's expectations so that they can GET a man? Does that really sound "fair" to you? Why wouldn't these women just hold out for a man who will accept and love her for who she is, just like a man would want to be loved and accepted for who he is? If "love is life," then why would it matter how successful she is? That's saying that love is conditional, a woman needs to fit a mold in order to "earn it," or she can forget it.
Love is everything, just make sure you compromise yourself and betray your dreams in order to attain it. In other words, forget loving yourself. Is that about right? Well, don't worry...I will take that for what it's worth.

Answer 2

Hey,

Yes it is true, men are the protective type. I think that they have it imbedded in there genes to be that way but that protectiveness doesn't mean that men cannot deal with successful women.

I think that there has to be compromises on both sides if both parties are very successful and independent. For example, if the women seems to have everything, she will have to try hard to make sure that the man feels important in her life. It may seem as though the woman needs nothing but that is far from the truth. Even if a woman seems to have everything she is often in need of emotional support.

Even though the woman is self sufficient, she could also let her partner walk on the "road side" of the sidewalk and open doors for her and ask for her partner's support and ideas in various matters. Women don't have to be weak to be with a man and men don't have to be the arrogant, power-hungary, dominating dorks that society portrays them to be.

So long as both parties feel respected and needed by the other, it shouldn't matter how successful the woman or man is.

Hope this helps,

Suzanne

Answer 3

I think there is some truth to what you say though I don't think its absolute.

I prefer a successful, smart woman, but I don't want to marry her. Marriage seems to be a loosing proposition for the guy - particularly when kids are involved.

Then again, being with someone is not the same thing as being married to someone. I'm not threatened by women, but I am threatened by the effects of marriage on the relationship.

Marriage turns people into idiots - both guys and girls - not just the guys as many ladies who have already posted seem to believe, though I admit I may be misinterpreting the comments. I'm willing to admit I have my own bias even though being truthful in that regard might weaken my argument - I'm more interested in truth than in winning and I don't think 'truth' is 'women are the superior gender' or 'men are afraid of successful women' or 'women are selfish'.

SOME people believe these things and they scream the loudest. I don't think all people think in such absolute terms and are in fact willing to admit they may be wrong and to objectively consider other viewpoints.

We ALL have our biases - both men AND women. Disagreement DOESN'T mean the other party is wrong - it means there has been no compromise found that makes everyone happy.

Society used to have such a compromise, now that things have changed, the new compromise is still being hashed out is all.

Answer 4

That statement is very true of how some men feel about a successful woman. It takes hard work for a woman or a man to accumulate houses, good carrears, good cars, and everything. A woman should feel good about herself if these are her goals and she has accomplished them. If a man truly loves, with all his heart, a woman who happens to be successful, then that stuff wont matter, just as it shouldnt matter to a woman if a man has stuff or not when she falls in love with him. IF a man wonders where he fits in --if she got everything-- tell him this-- You fit in her heart. And there is no more powerful place than that.

Answer 5

I agree with all that. I concider myself old fashioned and expect the man to "have it all" and let me stay home to raise the kids. But times are changing, there will always be the extreme one way or the other regarding any situation, so there will always be some one like me, and some one like the other woman. But since the times are changing the men are also changing. There was a report a month or two ago talking about men's testosterone levels going down, so their need to "provide and protect" will be lower than "normal" men with high testosterone.

I think women who are in the catigory you mention feel they can not find a loving man with out having it all, they want to be intimidating to men because they were raised in the times of "empowering" women because they are concidered weaker. That means any man who sees them as weaker will take advantage of them, so I suppose that really their drive is not to have it all, but to "protect" them selves from being taken advantage of.

Answer 6

Are you suggesting that women should not be successful or wealthy so that they will not cause some nitwit to feel insecure? If a man felt intimidated by my profession and affluence why would I possible want someone like that in my life? Granted I have usually dated men who travel in the same social circles as myself and they probably have amassed as much economically as i have. I certainly would never judge a man who had less or worked in a lower paying position.

Answer 7

I love a man that has something to teach me and that he's someone who I can look up to and respect. I don't know what that says about me, but that's what keeps me interested.

I have always gravitated toward much older men who have life experience and who are successful in their careers. I appreciate organization, discipline, intellect, responsibility and integrity in a man. I love to learn new things and I love a man who can teach me. If it makes him feel powerful and happy, then all the better. I have no problem with a man taking care of me as long as he understands that I can be lead, but not pushed.

Answer 8

'...The news went on to talk about the insecurities of a man when dealing with a successful woman..."

I simply cannot understand the nature of your 'question'. You also wrote "...men can feel less and a bit insecure..."

If the man is 'insecure', he is correspondingly what's called 'neurotic'. Neurotics can benefit from psychological counselling. They can learn to get over their neuroses. It's their PERCEPTION of reality that makes them neurotic; perception is unique to the individual (in the eye of the beholder only). It is not the same as "objective" reality. This underscores the disconnect between what is objective reality, and what is incorrectly perceived as 'reality'. Such individuals are not psychotic (which involves a TOTAL break with reality). However, they are not entirely psychologically healthy either. If you still don't understand then look up these terms in a good dictionary or glossary of terms.

Anyway, what does one man's neurosis have have to do with women in general? These men need to learn to get over their neurosis: how they achieve this is up to THEM, and not a job for the 'object' of their neurosis (accomplished women) to do for them!

Answer 9

So...Don't be successful and get a man???I don't know,I understand the insecurity part,but it seems kind of silly at the same time.Why sit back and let someone else provide for you if you could provide for yourself?I like my independence,personally,and when I meet a guy that's not intimidated by that,I may just throw a party.It does make sense,though.

Answer 10

You mentioned the News as your source.
Most of the News is run by Feminist loving devout Liberals.

There desire is to destroy what use to be the American family, Husband, Wife, and the Children and also to make the male's look like non-essential Idots.

Just look at most TV Ads, and most sitcoms.

One must not believe all of the crap that comes across as news from the major News Medias.

I do not think the majority of male's are scared of female authority they just do not care for or like it.

Going to the Bible; You can say what you want and disreguard this if you like.
But, The man was placed at the head of the house and the woman. It's in your bible, read it for yourself.

That is why the Liberals & Feminists do away with the Bible and try to cover up what it says.

Now, Does that mean as a man, a woman or wife, is slave and we men have the previleged like a sargent to give ordors and command. Certainly not.
The Married couple is to be yielded, committed and in submission to each other.
There is to be a love relationship between a Husband and His wife. Which sould be the direct example of the loving relationship between God and His Son and His Church.

There is always going to be a problem with a man and woman just living together because God does not ordain that to be. Sorry, if that makes you mad. But that is just the way it is.

There is always going to be a problem with women in authority because that is not the way God ordained it to be either.
When the truth of the Bible is changed it brings the opposite effect.

I also understand that there are times when women must step up and take charge or things would fold and just not get done..

Sorry, But, that does not eliminate the main on going problem.