i am the only child and my dad is very controlling, whereas my mom cares too much about what other people think. they think money solves everything and they disapprove of almost everything in my life from friends, boyfriend, clothes, EVERYTHING!
WHY ARE THEY DOING THIS??
are we dysfunctional or psychologically effed up?
2007-01-24 05:04:02 · 6 answers · asked by vachel 1 in Social Science ➔ Psychology
You answered your own question.
Everyone has a messed up childhood. If you are over 18 years old... who cares what they think. They need to mind their own business when it comes to your weight, as long as you are not in any physical danger.
2007-01-24 05:14:49 · answer #1 · answered by jt51502004 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
This is a very common dilemma in family life. Some people strive to succeed to the point that they develop a cause and effect outlook on life. Such being that if you act a certain way then life will be a certain way. Your parents therefore want to control everything to as to have a specific outcome and anything less than their expectations will cause disapproval. They have learned to control their own behavior and to conform or adhere to a certain lifestyle in order to obtain and maintain their lifestyle. Unfortunately in the process many people like that refuse or are in denial that their children have a life of their own with individual personalities and characteristics. You rightfully feel stifled by their pressure to conform and follow the recipe of success in their eyes. You feel you can't be yourself and maybe that's true. What they may not realize is that by pushing you towards their idealistic lifestyle they may actually be pushing you away from it as you attempt to escape from it. You probably are young and have a long way to go before you can gain independence from your family so I would advise you to try to find a way to co exist with your parents without being miserable because you don't want to mess up the rest of your life with bad decisions. Keep a cool head and remember that you are an individual and are entitled to your own thoughts and ideas. Just stay calm and let them voice their opinion as well. It's a big world out there and I'm sure they have your best interests at heart and don't really know of any other way to address those issues. If it gets really bad for you then try to find a local clinic where you can get counseling. Don't crack up on us, we need you around!
2007-01-24 13:28:11 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Are you an adult? If so, you can do what you want. Don't allow them to dictate your life. If you're happy being the size you are, stay there. Are you all dysfunctional? Of course you are, but so is everyone else. It's merely a matter of degree. Take control of your destiny and tell them "thanks, but no thanks" regarding thier advice on your "personal" business (your body, finances, etc.). Start today. You'll find that it is so "freeing". Good luck to you!
2007-01-24 19:03:31 · answer #3 · answered by JOURNEY 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your family is effed up! You are not alone. What you need is to get away from them.I mean move to another state if need be.You are not your family clearly and you need a place where you can be you.The reason they are doing this is because they can..you are the only child.Don't enable them!!!!
2007-01-24 13:22:58 · answer #4 · answered by miss-snoopy 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sometimes, criticsm is valid to the extent of trying to cause you to change something for reasons pertaining to your health....other times...it is just a way for the critic to displace insecurity for the things about themselves that bother them....Don't allow the way others feel to dictate how you feel about you....There is a way out of the dileemma of low self esteem....Maybe they are trying to allow you to break free from what they see is hindering you.
2007-01-24 13:27:04 · answer #5 · answered by 35 YEARS OF INTUITION 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
15 pounds is nothing to worry about - tell them to get a life
2007-01-24 13:17:04 · answer #6 · answered by peaches 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋