how do you get over the disappointment of a broken marriage?

Question

what are some positive steps you can take in your life to rebuild yourself?

Answer 1

One way- TIME. Also, try to be with friends, try to keep busy and look at this time of life as a new beginning for yourself. Most people don't adapt well to change, but it is still inevitable. The best thing you can do right now is, take your time to heal, try to stay busy, maybe with a hobby, or work, or family. Try to draw in a circle of friends- not those who judge your mistakes, but ACCEPT your mistakes. The last thing you want to do right now is beat yourself up for what has happened. When you're ready to start dating again, (and take your time on this!) try to find the one who fills your expectations. Try not to settle. Be selective. You need to be your own best friend right now, too. Good luck, hon!

Answer 2

First you acuse the other for the whole thing going bad. Then you start talking about everything you did and cannot understand why he couldn't been better. Then you realize after a while that you miss them being around and remembering the reason why you feel in love to begin with and all the neat things you did together. From there you cry your eyes out and wish things were different and start wondering if you may have done something wrong. BUT, this is not what to do. Takes tooo much time. Think about what is in a relationship. If this one failed then more than likely the next one will also. You need to make sure that you have yourself in check as to who you are and that you are unique. That someone needs to love you and not change anything about you because that is who they fell in love with and you need to be able to sacrifice that some character within yourself and learn to love each other for who they are and who they may become. I don't know why your relationship ended but it takes 2 to make a relationship last. The agenda of each person to make a relationship is the most dangerous part. So if you want to make a lasting one, then find someone to love for who they are and someone who loves you just the same. God made all of us in our own special way. And you need to find yourself first and foremost then that other person will fall right in place. Good luck!!

Answer 3

I'm still trying to find the answer to this question and I've been divorced now for 6 years. I think family and friends are a good start. Keep yourself positive, set goals for yourself. And whatever you do, don't jump into another relationship. I am living proof that until you're over the man you were married too (no matter how long you were married) - you won't last in another relationship.

Answer 4

Surround yourself with friends. I personally have not been married, but I have dealt with ending a relationship with someone: my mother. I had to move away and surround my self with completely different people. It takes time and friends to deal with something that big. I would not recommend jumping into a new relationship because you probably have a lot of emotions right now and it's hard to figure out which ones are truly what you want.

Answer 5

Every day is a choice for me. Every day I choose to be happy, move on with my life, make the right decisions, LIVE. Choosing to live was what saved me.

I changed my wardrobe, my outlook on what I wanted and needed in life, my hair style, began working out and dropped about 35 lbs total since my filing day, quit smoking, and look at each day as an opportunity to learn and grow. Kinda sappy, but there it is...

Answer 6

Fill up the emptiness with positives. Take a class, learn a new craft, read, walk, make new friends, clean your house from top to bottom, take up photography, learn to make beautiful cakes, learn yoga, so many ideas, pick one or two or four.
It took me years to "get over" my last divorce. I still love him, but must go on with life.
Remember to fill the hole left behind with positives, or they will fill back in with negatives.
Good Luck!

Answer 7

Change behavior. Join a gym or just take up walking, running, or cycling. Get a new hairstyle or color. (Don't tell me how much you like your current style; change it. You can always go back later.) Buy a new outfit-make sure it's something sexy (not slutty, sexy) and something you may not have previously considered. Take up a new hobby. Learn to appreciate how special and independent you are.

Answer 8

I just answered a question similiar to yours........ Honey, you have to make NEW memories!!! Bottom line!! Get out, keep busy, and God forbid, dont go to places to where the two of you "Used to go, too!!" I cannot emphasize that enough!! Going to places, or listening to music, that used to remind you of your time together, is the worse thing you can do...... change everything about your life, as much as possible....Even if it means making new friends, and giving your old ones a "Break".... Just so you can begin a new fresh way of life!!! Go window shopping, take trips with family to unfamiliar places!!! Do anything to make new memories, in order to get passed the old ones!!!! Start some hobbies.. .. get creative! Start to writing poetry, about your feelings.... Or paint, or croche a blanket...... Or begin to do all of those things you may have not been able to do before, because of your marriage, you know...... Go back to College, take a Pottery class, or whatever suits your fancy, you know..... Meet new friends through school.. Go to the Clubs with your new friends, every once in awhile!! If you have kids, start taking them to places, that you've never gone to before..... Pamper yourself, with a "Shopping Trip" , just for you!!! Go to a book store and buy a good book to read, to take your mind off of things..... And if all else fails, go see a devorce counselor....... I know how hard devorce is..... I refused to devorce my first husband, not because I didn't "Mutually want it", but because of my "Morals"...... I honestly dont believe in devorce, but you'd never think so, since I've now been devorced 3 times!!! Believe me the last two were just as hard for me, as the first one was!!! I honestly feel if you do everything in your power to make things work, and your still facing the same issues every year, with no changes, on your mates end of things, and have just literally hit a "DEAD-END" in the road of marriage, and their not willing to go to Marriage counseling with you, than you basically have no choice, but to devorce, in order to grow in your own personal life, as a human, you know..... Its a sad thing, to go through, and I never left the court house feeling like "Partying" like some people say they do, instead I went home and cried, and I felt like a "Failure" at marriage, but, that all changed when I had to annalyze things, and came up with the conclusion that I gave my all to all three marriages, and it wasn't enough is all !!! And when they dont do their part, the marriage isn't balanced, and somethings got to give, someway, somehow!!! And I just had, had enough, you know!!! So, your not alone, with your feelings, just remember that...... Good luck to you, and just remember, "Today is the beginning of New things to come!!!" Smile!!!!

Answer 9

start over. take some classes, move to another city, maybe join some groups or clubs. its hard because damn near everything will remind you of that person, so you have to remove yourself. most importantly, forgive yourself! if it was your fault, vow to make a change, if it wasnt, forgive them and learn from the mistakes. good luck!

Answer 10

There is no FORMULA for MENDING a broken heart. Just push it to the back of your mine and get on with your LIFE. GOOD LUCK.