I had an elaborate celebration for him. That was a few years ago and circumstances were different. His Bday is in June and mine in March. His job is very stressful now and I want to save him needless pressure. He is a very sensitive person and wants a big celebration for me (which I have encouraged until now). I've told him that take out with the kids is great. What can I do to ease his stress?
2007-01-24 02:05:16 · 12 answers · asked by Quoi05 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
It sounds like he really wants to throw a big party for you. I think it is important to you, too - you both want to have that memory, you know? So - I'd do whatever you can to take other burdens off him, so that he has more ability to do this party. Let him do the party - don't try to affect that. Just give him more space to do it. That way everyone is happy.
2007-01-24 02:10:28 · answer #1 · answered by Steven D 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
DH? Anyway, please stop being such a martyr- take-out?!?!?!?! No, an elegant dinner out would be nice... then, I could see your point.
You are THE main person in the family. Mothers keep it together, and mothers usually deserve more htan anyone else.
Stop babying the "poor man" and let him do what he feels possible.
Of course, if there's money, then you can send a hint through family members that he just needs to hire the right people. Of course, based on the way you spoke of not wanting to pressure him, you could do it sneaky- "Oh, I wish he would let it go. Or at least hire someone, for goodness sake. Or if he had help from somewhere... but really, it's too much pressure the way it is now..."
For all you know, your families are already helping, and letting you sweat it out!
Happy 40th!!!
2007-01-24 02:13:36 · answer #2 · answered by starryeyed 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You know that you don't want take out... you are just playing "cinderella" so then you can feel miserable and dissapointed when he comes back home with a box of greasy chinese food. You like playing "martyr", don't you?
Let me tell you something: men do NOT take hints, and if you tell him that you want "take out", he will do just that. Then you can rub in his face how much time you took to plan HIS birthday and make him feel guilty for being inconsiderate and not doing enough.
If you want a party, tell him! reverse psycology doesn't work with men, specially if he is as busy as you say he is.
Good luck
2007-01-24 02:24:28 · answer #3 · answered by Blunt 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
send a sweet note that tells him how you want your birthday to be just him and you after a night of take out with the kids and then explain the night of just him and you. maybe after the kids are in bed..you rented a great movie snuggle etc.. no stress in that.
2007-01-24 02:11:35 · answer #4 · answered by crystal b 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Oh, I wouldn't know, just tell him again you don't want a big party and explain that that would be very stressful for you both and you don't need it right now all you need is peace and quiet.
2007-01-24 02:11:17 · answer #5 · answered by happydial 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It may relieve his stress to have this shindig for you! Did you not enjoy having your husbands party? Leave it alone, let him do what he wants to do. Happy Birthday.
2007-01-24 02:26:38 · answer #6 · answered by Bev 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell him that it doesn't matter how you celebrate your 40th, as long as you are spending it with him....that's all that matters, right?
2007-01-24 02:12:35 · answer #7 · answered by Ŗεŋεε 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
"which I have encouraged until now"...
So you pushed and nagged him about having a big party for you, and now that he's stressed, you feel bad...
Plan it yourself...
2007-01-24 02:09:42 · answer #8 · answered by Back in the game... 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
just help him in ways that he wont really know you are helping him like HINT about what he needs to be doing .
2007-01-24 02:12:18 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
show him you are 20!
2007-01-24 02:12:53 · answer #10 · answered by crisjul v 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋