I'm a stand - up comedienne, could this put guys off?

Question

I've been single for ages and with all due respect, I'm a great communicater, decent looking, socially aware, hard working, I dress well and am a good all round person. I also have a great sense of humour and am a paid stand-up comedienne - I'm thinking that could be an off putting thing for guys for a number of reasons including: making people laugh is a form of power; it can be quite an intimidating position and maybe guys think I have no emotions apart from those i display on stage. Can people help me out on this - am I on to something? do you think this is a factor in why I have been a single female for soooooo long? Thanks for your time, really appreciated.

Answer 1

Well, it might be, or might be not. Guys that have a history of being teased might see you and your humor, althaugh friendly intended, as something to avoid. But if your humor is a defence because you want to protect yourself, that might keep away more people. You can check it with them. I usually love girls that are telling jokes, but if they tease me, I get pissed off.
There's more about jokes and relations: one can tell jokes to avoid someone, or one can tell jokes to get close to someone. Or both :)
One can tell jokes in order to be accepted, while remaining at a safe distance.

Answer 2

Hi. I think that is really great that you are a stand up comedienne. I don't think that this alone would be an "off-putting" thing for guys, but I think if you were not finding a balance when you spend time with guys, that could be a factor. What I mean, is that if you spend time with a guy and you seem to only show your comedienne side, they may not be able to see the emotional, caring, deeper person that they would want to have a relationship with. I'm sure there are some cases where it would be intimidating to a guy, but you wouldn't want a relationship with this type anyway, would you?

Anyway, just take a close look at what you put out there. Try to put yourself totally in the other persons shoes and see if you can feel what they would feel. Maybe this will help. Good luck to you and I'm sure you will find your answer.

Answer 3

I don't see making people laugh as a form of power. I see it more as being willing to put yourself in the position of trying to entertain others, which to me, gives more power to the people you are trying to please. I hate to use this term, but the best way to make the point is to say "court jester".

I don't see it as a particularly intimidating position either, so the problem could be that you (I'm not saying I have to be right, just offering the way someone else thinks) have over-inflated your sense of power and intimidation. If this is the case then you need to ask what is at the root of over-inflating the power and intimidation you believe you have.

There's also the chance that you're just up against the same odds a lot of other women are up against when it comes to meeting the right person - and it could have nothing to do with anything beyond that.

If, though, you're the "loud-mouth" type of comedienne, who does crude jokes that is still something many men don't find appealing in a woman. Someone like Ellen Degeneres doesn't do crude humor (at least on tv) and doesn't come across as a "long-shore-man" (sp?). Someone like Rosie O'Donnell (for example in an HBO special) does. What I'm saying is if you have non-crude humor men will find you appealing. If you do crude humor many men won't. It isn't about power. Its about what men find becoming in a woman - even today.

Chances are, though, you're just one of the many women who hasn't yet found someone.

(I don't mean to have made rude remarks. I just thought you'd want honesty in any of the many opinions you will get on here.)

Answer 4

Actually I find it a turn on and I think alot of guys might too. You just have to find the right guy who will be receptive to a female comedian. Comedy clubs might be a good place to hang out. I really don't see what the problem is, you sound perfect.

Answer 5

i think of your job could have some thing to do with it. you're able to desire to be a solid and helpful woman, and you likely discover the humor in situations the place generic women could start up sniffling. you apart from mght have a job that a number of adult males could want that they had...greater glamorous than being an accountant or a table clerk. yet save at it! you will discover the splendid guy!

Answer 6

I think youre right that its clearly noticable that your job and the power to make peopel laugh is a form of power and dominance of peoples attention. I am going to guess that you are an extroverted, take charge individual, and in that case, the simple solucion, is to find a more passive mate. there do exist guys that like a powerful woman. you gotta find one of those. of course, as they are passive, You will have to approach Them.

Answer 7

maybe guys are afraid if they date you they'll become part of your comedy routine especially if it ends badly.