So well... i am indian(hindu) and my bf is colombian(hispanic) we are totally in love with each other and are planning a future togather... problem is my parents. I belong to a very very very conservative family.and yes arrange marriages.. thats the tradition.. girls not allowed to date etc the whole 9 yards.. i dont know how to go about telling my parents about it. and i am scared alot to hurt them because i love them and till now i think they have given me more freedom then any other girl in our family has. I love my parent alot and i know they loves. i am a single child.i dontknow what to do. any suggestions... ??? i am like trully in love with this guy and i mean he is the best thing that has ever happened to me ... :-(.
2007-01-23 15:04:49 · 8 answers · asked by ME 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
First, make sure that your relationship is solid. Make sure that he can show your parents the ability to take care of you(money/car/home). Most importantly, he must respect your parents, even if they don't like him. If he has that ability to give you a good home and life (He has a good job and treats you like a queen), even if your parents are against it, you can marry him and he can prove himself with his actions. Parents are very forgiving when they see that a man is doing his best to take care of their baby.
2007-01-23 15:15:46 · answer #1 · answered by A dad & a teacher 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should first realize that this relationship is not gone to be easy. Once you have realized that you should determine if this guy is worth the trouble. If no than let him know about your culture and let him go and don't drag him along. If you truly to love him and he loves you and you guys are ready to go through hell than the first thing you should do and sit down with your parents. Bring it to them in a respectable manner. Tell them that you are interested in a guy. Ask about their opinion. I would ask the mom first, them seem to be more open minded. See how your mother reacts when you tell her that you like a guy and he is not Indian. Than make the necessary moves accordingly.
Just remind your parents that you love them very much and that you respect the traditions but this is something you have to do for yourself. Hopefully they will understand.
I dated a girl who was also an Indiana (Hindu) and I am African American and she never told her paretns after 2 years. It was just so hard for us and it was hell for me. The fact that she kept the relationship a secreat only created more problems for us in the future and as a result we didn't make it. It was a learning experience.
Hopefully it won't be the same for you. I hope that helped. Take care.
2007-01-23 23:17:53 · answer #2 · answered by Truth 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Be prepared to loose your parents forever. Only you can decide if your guy is worth it. Best of luck to you. Hope your parents can be opened minded. The times, they are a changing even for Indian Hindus.
2007-01-23 23:15:05 · answer #3 · answered by starflower 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm sure your parents in the long run want what will make you happy. If you feel you can't confront them face to face, write them a letter saying essentially what you have said here. Your parents love you and want the best for you, but they also should realize that you have a say in your future.
2007-01-23 23:12:48 · answer #4 · answered by sassy_395 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Try to to convince your parents to arrange the marriage with your bf. If they won't do that then try explaining to your parents why you are not gonna have a marriage arranged and why you're gonna marry him. They'll probably understand, they might even change their minds and arrange the marriage for you two. Good luck.
2007-01-23 23:10:29 · answer #5 · answered by DiMooch 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Explain to your parents that times have changes and it sucks to have been you guys but my life is my life. Of course, in a nice way.
Just remember to emphasize your happiness.
If he can and will take care of you, put that in too. Say that you will always be in good hands and secure with your life.
2007-01-23 23:10:49 · answer #6 · answered by masterscribe888 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why don't you ask your parents to arrainge a marriage between him and you.. let them meet him and see if he meets their idea of who is right for you.. who knows, they make like the guy so much they will demand that you marry him..
2007-01-23 23:10:48 · answer #7 · answered by J. W. H 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
HAVE THIS FELLA VISIT AND GET AQUAINTED WITH YOUR FOLKS AND WORK TOWARD BLENDING HIM INTO YOUR LOVING FAMILY. TAKE HIM WHERE YOUR DAD WORKS AND LET YOUR DAD EXPLAIN HIS OCCUPATION TO HIM. IT WILL TAKE A GREAT BLENDING JOB I KNOW BUT WHERE THERES A WILL THERES A WAY. THE MORE YOU TRY TO BLEND HIM THE MORE YOULL LEARN ABOUT HIM TOO. DONT FOLD BUT YET BE PATIENT WITH YOUR PARENTS AFTER ALL IT MEAN YOUR INHERITANCE DOWN THE ROAD.
2007-01-23 23:24:35 · answer #8 · answered by woolly worm 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋