I've worked 5 years with this woman. She's the kind of person who is in a bad situation because of things she does to her self (such as saying she's poor but eating out every night, going out every weekend, and buying expensive jewelry).
Her husband can drop her off at work but not pick her up, so she need a ride home. I've been taking her home for years even though it's on the other side of town and not convenient for me. Never once has she said thanks or offered me any money.
Recently she said she had some food she bought with food stamps that was not being used (she's too good to eat beans and rice) so I said I'd take it if she didn't want it. She told me that the only way I'd get it is if I'd take her home for a whole week!
What's a nice way to tell her I don't want to take her home anymore? I know what will happen: she'll cry and tell a long story about her having to walk home, so how do I keep from caving in? Is it worth telling her off? I'd appreciate any advice.
2007-01-23 13:54:45 · 10 answers · asked by freetodervish 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
Let me tell you something. You've put yourself in an imposition to drive her out of the way, and she can't GIVE you beans and rice without delivering an ultimatum. She won't change. I know her type as I have one in the family. The best thing you can do is cut off all ties because believe me, if you nicely state you can't drive her, she WILL come back and bug you for more rides. Be firm and don't feel intimidated. Some people just think the world owes them something, and unfortunately most of the world gives them what they want. Good Luck
2007-01-23 14:10:45 · answer #1 · answered by MNBound 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No. It won't work for you to tell her off.You've got a soft heart, you'll only later regret what you say to her. Just tell her, you thank her for her offer(which she has nothing to offer) but you will have to decline and that you have to be at a certain place right after work so you can no longer can take her home. When she start to cry, you already know It;s a set up, so you should be immune to her tears by now-So you say to her'' again I'm so sorry that I can no longer be of help to you be I have other pressing commitments and a time schedule to keep. When or if she ask what you say it's of a personal nature. All of this is true, you have to be home with your family.
2007-01-29 21:32:54 · answer #2 · answered by Go GO Ressa 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell her straight out that it's cutting into your time and gas. That you don't mind helping her out but it's come to the point where if she can't give you some money for gas she'll have to walk it.
Sounds to me like she's taking advantage of you. The older I get the more I see people like that .. crying how poor they are and crying poor me poor me when in reality they are living high on the hog.
You did your kindly jester .. but now it's expected of you by her. Look out for yourself from here on out ... YOU need to matter FIRST. Her husband can pick her up and if not then i guess she needs to find a job closer to where she lives.
GOOD LUCK
2007-01-31 07:07:04 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Seeing how it is so far out of your way, and the escalating gas prices are really tapping in to your wallet, it will have to end. I'm sure her husband will get her... For years??? OMG... ppl are sooo rude. Tell her she can keep the food as I'm sure she needs it where she cries poor mouth all of the time. And while your at it, maybe she could pawn some of her jewelry to get stuff she needs... like a car or gas money!!
2007-01-31 08:20:52 · answer #4 · answered by momof3 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You are being taken advantage off, what is keeping you in telling this lady that you go out of your way to give her a ride to her house. If she has a husband that lives with her why doesn't he come and pick her up from work. You need to tell her to look for someone else to take her home because you do not want to do it anymore, you have to get you spunk up, or else mister, she will always take you for a fool. A lady that does not appreciate someone that goes out of his way to give her a ride needs to be told off, and not in a nice way. For your peace of mind tell her off, she deserves it.
2007-01-30 17:57:45 · answer #5 · answered by a.vasquez7413@sbcglobal.net 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Of all the gall,,,,,,,,,,,,,time to kick her off your gravy train and let her find her own way home. Obviously you have come to recognize that you are being used and it is time for her to call a Taxi for her ride home. If she has the money to eat out then she has the money to pay for a ride. Ughhhhh
2007-01-31 08:39:46 · answer #6 · answered by iambettyboop 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i agree, tell that damn woman she is an ungreatful mooch and she has brought everything on herself. be blunt and be stern because if not, she will approach you tomorrow as if nothing else was said to her! i have a bum in my family (older brother) and he blows his money on eating out, cigarettes, weed, and other stuff that is not needed. so after his money is gone, hes up at dads house bumming cigs, pop, food and pain pills that he doesnt need either.be blunt and be stern and tell her how it is because she leaves you no other choice. one day she will thank you.
2007-01-25 08:36:08 · answer #7 · answered by tim h 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
tell her it will cost her $5 a ride and don't give in about it either that or stuff your pockets with a local cab company's business card and when she walks up to your car hand one to her. unlock YOUR door with the key get in and drive away. if she doesn't let you leave lock your doors and call the police, let them deal with her sobbing
2007-01-31 12:32:08 · answer #8 · answered by g g 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just tell her nicely that it is out of your way and with the price gas is that you can not afford to help her any more.
2007-01-23 14:00:42 · answer #9 · answered by terry b 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you can choose your friends apparently, a true friend would not treat you like that, ok . you got to tell her how she is coming across. have some respect for yourself.
2007-01-31 10:56:45 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋