I found out that my husband was cheating on me about 2 years ago. I forgave him and we were supposed to be on the road to recovery. I just found out that he was still in contact with the women. He says they haven't been sleeping together, but I know it's a lie. He has lied so much and hurt me so much and he has done it twice!!!! I want him to know how it feels before I leave him. I need advise.
2007-01-23 12:17:09 · 16 answers · asked by LovinMeNow 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Sorry, if you cheat he will NOT know what it feels like because he has no trust to break and feel betrayed about. There is nothing there...nothing. Your husband is only a shell of the man he once was, a husk.
Just leave. Quietly without remorse or regret. No yelling, no fighting. Leave with dignity, because you still have some and he doesn't.
2007-01-23 12:26:34 · answer #1 · answered by Poppet 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hi. Am sorry to hear this. I bet it really hurts. I have been cheated on and he did not change his ways even after I forgave him. I regret ever taking him back.Two wrongs dont necessarily make a right. You know yourself better than anyone. Could you live with yourself if you did this? You are better than this, am sure.It won't take away the pain or the betrayal away.
I suggest that you really ask yourself some tough questions. I personally never trusted him even after I forgave him, it just ruined what we had. Trust is a sacred thing and once its shuttered, its hard to rebuild.Decide what is important to you, to stay with him without the trust and face more hurt or to leave and hurt but eventually find someone who will treat you right and respect you. It isn't easy.I wish you all the best!
2007-01-23 12:27:45 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
revenge never works, just puts u down to their level, if u cheat on him for his cheating just shows u are no better than he is. he may not hurt over it at all. when i was going through a divorce, i made up this lie that i had this boyfriend, so my husband would feel hurt, he never even reacted never said a word. even though i wasn't cheating he thought i was, and was really hurt that he never even reacted to it. revenge just hurts the one seeking it, never the other guy. if he loved u in the first place, he never would have cheated in the first place.
2007-01-23 12:30:30 · answer #3 · answered by jude 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Revenge is not the answer here hon as it will only make you feel worse and not better... Two wrongs do not make a right.... I can feel for you .... The best revenge is kindess and being nice to him. Seperate from him and seek for a divorce and start to move on with your life without him... More then likely you will need counseling and help for this. The best revenge is living well without him. I wish you the best. Hugs for you.
2007-01-23 12:27:56 · answer #4 · answered by Lady Hewitt 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
revenge is bad. i mean its not an alternate way to hurts him. u might end up regreting it someday so to avoid that jz do what the best for you 1st like looking for the best lawyer to deal with your divorce paper then focusing on moving out frm the house. wats the point staying in the same house wif a liar? dont worry its going to be hard at the 1st place but then u worthit & u deserve to b treated better.good luck sis
2007-01-23 12:28:28 · answer #5 · answered by msfredliso 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Reason to not cheat out of revenge:
-It's easier to stoop as low as him just for payback but you lose your dignity in the process
-Could result in an unwanted pregnancy in your emotional and physical carelessness
-Could contract STD
-You're dragging a 4th party in causing more emotional confusion.
Just leave him. Cheating in spite won't be any better. You're not only degrading yourself but your body. In the long run, people will see him for who he really is.
2007-01-23 12:45:07 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
The best revenge is to be happy and live a great life. I'm guessing it will be without HIM, though. I'm so sorry. I know your pain all too well. It's up to them to do the right thing. Take care of you and best wishes through this hard time.
2007-01-23 12:42:24 · answer #7 · answered by Just Me 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you have lost TRUSTING him forget it.Once a cheater ALWAYS A Cheater BELEIVE IT some women feel that a man can change NO HE CAN'T that's in his nature..You are the one that has to choose to leave him but leave for the right reason.If you truly know he is cheating then you have a right to exit but if you don't know for sure then check it out first..THEN LEAVE THE JERK if he is cheating...
2007-01-23 12:40:20 · answer #8 · answered by gblue52 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
hi the time has come to just put your own needs first only think of you and do whats right for only you, because im sure you dont wanna be hurt anymore than you've been allreddy so its time to change and move on thers lots of other friends, people you can meet in time, happynes starts from you allways and how you live, if your not happy then work to change things only for you.
2007-01-23 13:12:08 · answer #9 · answered by ? 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Before you do anything... do you have son or daughter? Please think about them as well.
If he is just having fun playing with woman... just let him be but maybe totally dun sleep with him incase of STD!!! But if he is having a affair then maybe you can file a divorce. But whatever try to talk to him. If you don't have children and all don't work... and you can't do anything and YOU OUT OF YOUR MIND!!! CUT HIS PENIS
2007-01-23 12:25:50 · answer #10 · answered by vampool 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋