I need help please..................................?

Question

My boyfriend of 3 1/2 years broke up with me today. I was raped in October, and that put alot of stress on our relationship, and just before christmas I gave up on myself, since nobody seemed to be helping, and everything was to hard on me. Now he gave up too. I have nothing left, and no one to talk to. I was in counselling, and on anti depressants and my bipolar medication. I stopped doing all that too. I just can't deal with it anymore. Is there anything I can do or say to get him back? Get him to help me? I am crushed that he's leaving me now too.......I'm so lost and upset. I feel like ending my own life. He WAS the only thing that kept me going. Now he's gone. I need him back in my life. I know I gave up hope, but I need his love and support. He's acting like it's harder on him than it is on me.......

Can someone please give me some advice? or suggestions? I need some PLEASE! I don't think he WANTED the relationship over, but I have been so depressed, and no one actually tries to help me you know? They expect me to be the same happy person. Someone help. I am desperate. I need him back. I never realized how much he kept me going until now. And I hope it's not to late. I have been hard to deal with.........but it's expected right? I want to be happier, I really do. But it's hard..........

I feel I am partly at fault because I don't trust many people any more. And I shut him out of my feelings somewhat. I didn't tell him everything anymore, and kept some things to myself.........

Answer 1

OMG AM SOOO SORRY YOU ENDURE SUCH VIOLENCE. BUT YOU CAN NOT GIVE UP. LIFE IS WAY TO WORTH IT TO JUST GIVE UP.

FIRST IN ORDER FOR YOU TO CARE FOR ANYONE OR ANYONE CARE FOR YOU, YOU MUST CARE FOR YOUR SELF FIRST.

YOU CAN NOT DEPEND IN NO ONE BUT DEPEND ON YOU FIRST. YOU SHOULD BE PRIORITY NUMBER ONE.

GO BACK TO COUNSELING, TAKE YOUR MEDS, ONCE YOU START CARING FOR YOUR SELF THEN YOU CAN CARE AND LOVE SOME ONE. LATER WHEN YOU START PUTTING YOUR LIFE BACK TOGETHER THEN YOU CAN CALL HIM AND HAVE A HEART TO HEART TALK.

REMEMBER YOU ARE NOT ALONE. I KNOW THE FEELING. I HAVE BEEN RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE NOW. WHEN I WAS 9 YRS OLD, I WAS RAPE BY AN UNCLE, I HIDE IT FOR SO MANY YEARS, MY HEALTH WAS GOING DOWN THE HILL AND I END UP WITH ANOREXIA. AT THE AGE OF 16 MY WEIGHT WENT DOWN TO 80 POUNDS. I NEED IT HELP BUT DIDNT KNOW HOW TO ASK FOR IT, WITH OUT NO ONE KNOWING THE REASON. SO I DID. MY MOTHER WAS UPSET BECAUSE I DIDNT EAT BUT DID NOT WANTED TO KNOW WHY. I GOT REALLY CLOSE TO MY PSYCHOLOGIST. SHE WAS WONDERFULL. SHE GAVE ME THE TOOLS OF HOW TO DEAL WITH EVERYTHING. BUT IT TOOK YRS BEFORE I COULD SAY, AM DOING A LOT BETTER.

SO HANG ON AND ASK FOR HELP, BEFORE IS TO LATE. PLEASE. GET SOME ONE TO LISTEN, AND DONT GIVE UP. BELIEVE ME, IT WILL GET BETTER.

Answer 2

First, sorry about the rape. Now are or have you changed enough for your bf to come back? You feeling sorry for yourself actually drove him away, and now you want him back. You need to move on beyond the past and start living again for him to return. Hes not going to return to the same old you. Right now youre not worth it to him. Yes his presence was helping you but you forgot that he was a person with needs too and he probably just wanted to see that from you. Not a whole lot but even a very little would have probably helped. He didnt cause your past but your past force him to live with you in the present. He probably felt that nothing was getting better and wanted out. Now if you really truly want him back and get better, youre going to have to dig real deep inside yourself, acknowledge what happened , get strong and start rebuilding your life because life goes on with or without us. You have something to gain by rebuilding again; your bf and mostly your life. You dont need all those pills. Counseling can help but its up to you. Seek God and trust his ways and soon youll be going again. Believe in yourself and dont let this idiot who turned your world upside down ago ruin the rest of your life. If you do then this guy has gotten away with 2 crimes. Youre better than that and you have it deep inside you to change and go after what you want. Remember if you want something youll take a risk, if you want something bad enough then youll risk it all. You can do it. Good luck and dont quit. Also please let me know how youre doing, Im very interested in this so please email me

Answer 3

What happened to you is terrible. My sister was raped when she was eighteen. She dated after that and even had a baby. It was very hard for her because no one around her understood what she was going through. It was double hard because the guy left before she had the baby. She found herself alone with a baby to raise. Sadly, our family was not as supportive as we should have been. This hurts me to my heart even to this day about 14 yrs later. But, she decided to be alone for a while and that was what was best for her. 5 years later she fell in love with a man that later adopted my nephew. He is a great guy and perfect for my sister. I won't pretend that there is no "scars" on my sisters, but she is a survivor and has a happy family.
My advise is not new, but here it is. Hold on just a little bit longer. Some guys can't deal with the truth of your rape, but I know that there are guys who can love you.
If you can, go back and get counseling.
Good luck. And remember, don't rush yourself. You have your own clock for healing. Don't think that you should heal at anyone else's schedule.

Answer 4

wow and you think you got it rough well let me tell you what i was molested as a child i was given from one family member to another sometime my mom others dad several aunts got removed from my last place at 16 had a blood problem told i would never walk again married 4 times divorced 3 have kids by all 4 lost 1 to my parents and her parants got the other was put in jail for contempt of court for six months because i refused to sell my home and pay rent my best friend died in a fire my favorite cousin died in a wreck 3 miles from my house and did not know it for a year lived with a gal for two yrs had a little girl from buy her the mother stole her from me a year later and a year after that gave her to the state of Oklahoma who adopted her out with out my knowledge went into business for my self after four years i went to a Doctor and he gave my a deadly deiase I had to have a liver transplant this year and threw all this I lost my business and the millions that was poured into have been unable to get a job back in my field will be on medication rest of my life and told new liver will probably last 10 yrs because the deise has not been gotten rid of and have gone threw bouts of depression that have lasted for months but yet i keep plugging away so as my wife says quit your bitchen other people have it worse sorry for the crappy spelling and some times she is right !!!!!!!!