My best friend always acts really weird, almost jealous, whenever I mention guys I like around her, and has told me she does not think she'd be able to confide in me if I started seeing someone. I know she isn't seeing anyone and has not had a boyfriend and I always feel bad bringing anything of the sort up in front of her, but she is my best friend and I want to talk to her about these things! any advice?
2007-01-23 11:26:17 · 31 answers · asked by Ally 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
she becomes almost spiteful...
2007-01-23 11:26:36 · update #1
Sounds like she wants you for herself
2007-01-23 11:28:31 · answer #1 · answered by tchem75 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She sounds like she's just jealous, not a lesbian. If she was a closeted lesbian, she'd be spending less and less time with you in favor of gravitating toward lesbian chatrooms, etc., and would be totally disdainful to the notion of dating men.
Women tend to be competitive, especially with their peers. If you have a boyfriend and your pal doesn't, that means she's behind the curve in some way. (Put it this way, when I got engaged, one of my sisters, who had never had a boyfriend, got worse than spiteful, she got downright mean.)
In the interest of saving the friendship, confide in your other friends, your mom or sisters, or to people online, or to a diary rather than to your best friend. However, I'll bet you anything that the second she meets a guy she likes, she'll be gushing all about him to you.
2007-01-23 11:36:12 · answer #2 · answered by Guernica 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Your friend either has a crush on you (yes, a crush) or she needs to mature. She's using emotional blackmail in telling you she won't be able to confide in you if you start seeing someone. You should be able to talk to a friend about anything. She wants to hold you back, and unless you'll be happy to just have her as your only friend than you need to be blunt and let her know that she's being immature about the situation and her demands make you uncomfortable.
2007-01-23 11:33:57 · answer #3 · answered by bfwh218 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She is jealous and possessive. Best friends should be supportive of you, not be spiteful. If I was you, I would seriously consider finding a new best friend. Looks like she would dump you anyway if you had to get a serious boyfriend.
2007-01-23 11:32:11 · answer #4 · answered by salstick 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Can think of a few possibilities right off the top of my head...
1. Either she likes one of the guys YOU like...and doesn't want to see him and you get together.
2. She doesn't think she'll EVER get a boyfriend...and doesn't want any of her other friends to have one, either.
3. She is afraid that..if you start dating a guy...a lot of the time that you and her spend together will be gone, because you'll be spending a lot of it with HIM.
...I'm sure there are many other possibilities. Hope it works out for the best.
Good luck!
2007-01-23 11:32:10 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
There are two possible answers to you question
1. Mayb she is jealious not of you but of your guys! She just misses having her best friend to herself! She might just be feeling down and want some to care about her and give her some attention but all you talk about is guys, remember your best friend who will be dere when your guys not
or
2. She jealous of your guy she wants you to herself. There is a reason she's never had a BOYfriend! Hint Hint! Just talk to her and see how she really feels!
Good Luck
2007-01-24 02:50:23 · answer #6 · answered by Lil Sofi 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would start distancing your self from her. A best friend is someone who will never be jealous or envious. She is someone who wants the best for you no matter what. Maybe when she realizes that you don't like her behavior she'll start to see your point if not find someone else to talk about what girls talk about most.
2007-01-23 11:32:00 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds either she is a lesbian and is in love with you, or she is to immature to know what really a best friend is for...she might just be afraid losing your friendship but if you talk to her and put the boundaries it'll be better, otherwise she will always be mad at you. And friends like that, why would you want enemies?
2007-01-23 11:31:31 · answer #8 · answered by evanesheaven1985 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
By telling you she feels she won't be able to confide in you if you started seeing someone is emotional blackmail not to mention manipulation,perhaps she feels that if you do start seeing someone then you'll drop her like a hot potato,as some girls do.Or it might be something completely different...her feelings for you might go beyond friendship...the best you can do is reassure her that if you do start seeing someone you'll still have time for her.If this doesn't work...perhaps you should re-think your friendship.
2007-01-23 11:35:19 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
She is your bestfriend right? Then quit talking about guys.
Seriously, bestfriends love one another, and are sensitive to each others needs.
Sounds like guys are a ouch with her. You don't want to hurt her, so just don't talk guys.
I don't know what type of girl she is, or if she is even interested in guys, but you do. Take a look at your bestfriend. Is there something your missing?
2007-01-23 11:34:09 · answer #10 · answered by LucyLinnae M 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe focus less on yourself and find out what's eating your friend instead of assuming she's jealous. You said she mentioned confiding in you, it seems to me there's something heavy on her mind.I bet if you help her with her problem first then you can go back to being as boy-crazy as you want.
2007-01-23 11:34:07 · answer #11 · answered by firecracker 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋