my wife and I split up recently and are now living together again. We are trying to work things out. But she is always talking to the guy she left me for. I mean every day for hours. I have told her how this makes me feel but she dosent care. She said if it wasent for the way I treated her we wouldnt be in this mess. I did watch porn and questioned if I wanted to be with her at one time. But thats is in the past. I am all about her and try to show her this since shes been back. She screens all my phone calls and trys to find me with someone else like I am the one thats cheating. I have never cheated. We still havent kissed since she has been back. I hold her at night when we sleep and try to hug her and flirt but she dosent seem interested in me. She even lets me give her massages and kiss her body but once the massage is over its over. I am just confused.
2007-01-23 09:34:38 · 26 answers · asked by Mini Zee 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Why are you confused ?
The signals she is sending are clear.
She is not interested in being with you.
I would end it before she ends it. At least you will be the one in conrol of that!
2007-01-23 09:37:23 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should not be with her right now, until she decides what she wants. It sounds to me like she is taking advantage of your as* kissing, by accepting massages from you, but giving you nothing in return. She should not be talking with that other guy if you two are "trying to work things out". It seems like she needs to grow up a lot. Maybe you need to find an older woman who will treat you right. I know that age really has nothing to do with it, but this lady sounds immature and a little young. I mean, so what if you watched pornography, it's not cheating, and every man does it. I would dump her and move forward, instead of being mistreated and love starved. I wish you good luck!!!
2007-01-23 17:49:27 · answer #2 · answered by Stephanie H 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think she's not a very nice person, she is screening your calls because she trying to catch you out so she can off load her own guilt for talking to this other man.
If she really wanted to come back to the relationship she would have severed all ties with this other man.
She has worked out she has something to lose by leaving i think.
The fact you watched porn is no reason for her to judge you , you are not the one who ran out and shacked up with another person at the first opportunity. You could not touch, feel or have a connection with a porno film, So what was the problem? I think she is the one desrepecting you and if she doesnt get her priorties right meaning your her husband and he is just another man , i dont think you will have a good relationship.
good luck with the path you choose!
2007-01-23 17:42:46 · answer #3 · answered by aime 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
the reason why she is screening all of your calls (trying to find some excuse that you are cheating) is because she wants to use that as a cover up for the fact that she is probably cheating. or is maybe using that as a way out of the relationship. if it makes you feel that bad...then why did you two get back together? you should have stayed apart and just gotten a divorce. that way she can live her life like she wants to and you can live your life like you want to. why do you want to be with someone that doesn't want you?
2007-01-23 19:09:43 · answer #4 · answered by cfalways 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This sounds like a classic case of misuse. She is still calling the guy? Oh HELL no! You two need marital counseling, desperately...like yesterday. If she is that cool to your advances, it sounds like she is not interested in saving the marriage, pure and simple. Another big red flag is the fact she is teasing you with the massages. That is just sadistic. You need to ask yourself some tough questions about the long-term with this relationship. Sure, you made your mistakes, but she has as well; you don't necessarily forget mistakes, but in a marriage you have to learn to forgive. Get counseling, please; for the both of you. If she won't go, go for yourself, to sort out this situation. Good luck and God bless.
2007-01-23 17:44:25 · answer #5 · answered by soulguide70788 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You will have to seek counseling and help for this marriage to even make an attempt to try and make it work.. If she does not want to try and save and work on it then let her go. What you did with the porn is the same thing as cheating whether you admit it or not... Lusting after other people on your spouse is being unfaithful in your heart which is as bad as adultery. You may have to give her time.
2007-01-23 17:40:48 · answer #6 · answered by Lady Hewitt 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are chasing a dream. She's not interested in you any more. She is doing one of two things or maybe even both. 1. She's living off of you (free rent). Or, 2. She's doing her very best to get even by playing you for a fool. Either 1 or 2 she comes up the winner and you the loser. Face reality and move on.
2007-01-23 17:41:55 · answer #7 · answered by Vida 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It dont seem like she wants to be with you maybe you should consider splitting back up its disrespectful of her to still be talking to the guy while you two are back together maybe shes the one cheating and she isnt being fair to you
2007-01-23 17:42:06 · answer #8 · answered by libragurl 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well it kinda depends how bad you screwed up any why yall split. but if she hasnt kissed you, and is acting like shes not interested, and if shes still talking to that other guy. she may be back with you for a roof over her head. you may want to rule out the fact that shes not using you.
2007-01-23 17:40:21 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You two are both self destructing. Why don't you just push her out the door to the other guy since she's still calling him in YOUR face. Talk about being walked over.
2007-01-23 17:40:23 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Women! Sounds familiar lol.. Anyway, you may want to have a serious talk with her, she seems resentful and holding something against you for whatever reason. You cannot force, so talking is your best option first. If she cannot comply and understand let her know of your next best action...
2007-01-23 17:39:39 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋