He is being such a &itch!!! He is being mean to me and the kids and I am really ready to just say enough! Not hitting just bitching about everything and short tempered about everything. I can not do this much longer. Does anyone have any suggestions? Please nothing to mean because I really just want to snap as it is!!
2007-01-23 09:07:46 · 12 answers · asked by hummingbird 5 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Not sure how old your husband is? could he be going thru a mid life crisis? Tell him that you have noticed that he is changing and ask him if there is anything that you can help him with...maybe he is stressed with new bills or new pressures at work.
Write him a note if you cant talk to him and ask him to read it while he is on his lunch break at work.
Tell him that you and the kids deserve better than to have a man in the house that is constantly screaming
Give him the chance to change before you send his azz packing
2007-01-23 09:13:46 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
First of all calm down.
Use the opposite reaction he's expecting. Be very calm and say very few words to him.
The Bible says in James 1:19. "Wherefore, my beloved brother/sister, let everyone be swift to hear, slow to speak, and slow to wrath" also in the book of Proverbs is says "A soft answer turneth away wrath but greivous words stir up strife"
You'll freak him out when you go dead silent on him and don't give him the reaction that he's probably use to seeing. Also if he truly gets out of hand with his complaining, yelling, rudeness etc. Close your eyes while he's speaking, yelling or arguing with you... and start praying to yourself (you don't have to do it out loud, unless you want to) Ask God to give you strength to be a great wife and ask him to help your husband be a better man" When he realizes that you're praying for him... either one of two things will happen. Either he'll stop yelling and screaming and go away or he'll think you're crazy and leave you alone. Be sincere when you pray because... seriously.. God really hears you and will help.
When some time passes and you have a moment get really serious with him, look him dead in the eye (with a very straight, non emotional tone) say to him "with a stern, but loving tone... Some things have got to change around here. It's unacceptable for you to trip out and complain and be short tempered about everything. It's making me and the children feel extremely uncomfortable... and you need to change your behavior immediately"
Then walk away and chill somewhere for a while. Don't speak to him with an angry tone or a negative attitude.. Don't approach the subject when he's upset or is in the middle of having a fit. Give it sometime... do the "silence is golden" routine for a good while. Answer questions with very few words, or with yes and no's. Don't ever show that what he's doing or saying is getting to you. As long as he's not physical with you this will have an impact on his attitude once he sees he can't yank your chain or that you're not feeding into his "stuff" you'll be victorious in winning the war instead of just conquering in a few battles.
Don't forget to be consistent in trying this method. After a few months.. he won't know who you are. You both should consider going to marriage counseling... .seperately or apart... just go... that will help too.
2007-01-23 17:29:48 · answer #2 · answered by 247 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you need a vacation from the everyday life you're living. Plan something together and get away together. Don't worry about what you spend just go have some fun.
If you can't do that then you may want to start thinking about what life will be like without him and what the kids will think about that too.
2007-01-24 03:53:17 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Has he started being short-tempered and unpleasant recently? Has something changed between you/at work/at home/with his life? Sometimes, depression can manifest as moodiness and short-tempered bursts. Drug use can bring this on as well. If this is a long-term pattern, you need to seek out marital counseling for yourself and your spouse. If he refuses to go, go by yourself anyway. As for barking at the children, that's not good. Children can pick up on negative energy very quickly, and it can affect their schoolwork, health, etc. Get some counseling for them as well, if possible. If you're wondering, "how will I afford all this counseling for everyone?", most cities now have social services programs that have a sliding scale. If he refuses to seek help, you may have to leave; it would be healthier for you and the children, if it comes to that. Good luck and God bless.
2007-01-23 17:34:46 · answer #4 · answered by soulguide70788 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Suggest he do some me time. Suggest he do something on his own. When men start to get &itchy at home it is usually cuz they don't want to be there. This could mean that he is having an affair and the very sight of you makes him want to be with the other one. Look for the signs girl. Intuition is always right.
2007-01-23 17:14:16 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like the male version of PMS. lol
My hubby gets this way once a month and he makes me homicidal.
Just tell him how big of an a** he's being.
Maybe if you mention the PMS he will realize how bad he's being and get over himself.
2007-01-23 17:17:22 · answer #6 · answered by ksueditz 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Is he stressed out about bills or sexually frustrated? Try giving him some after his favorite meal. It might sweeten him up a bit.
2007-01-23 17:20:42 · answer #7 · answered by GrnApl 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why is he doing this??? Talk to him and see why he is so upset and angry.... Have him see his doctor and he may also need anger management classes. Do you ever nag him and bug him? If so then please try being nicer and not doing this so much.
2007-01-23 17:18:22 · answer #8 · answered by Lady Hewitt 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
then exercise to wear off your frustration. go for a walk or a run. clean. anything that is physical so that you can physically deal with your frustration.
2007-01-23 19:36:17 · answer #9 · answered by cfalways 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Are you sure he is not seeing a woman who like seconds? (I am serious)
2007-01-23 17:24:12 · answer #10 · answered by curious 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋