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I've been talking to this man who lives in another state. we've been having serious phone sex for over a month. he will be here for business from sunday thru tuesday a.m. i know i will be able to tell my husband that i am going shopping with the girls for the whole day on sunday. i am to meet him at his hotel. am i crazy? he is so sexy and sensual. when i hear his voice...i go crazy. i have pictures of him and he of me so we know what each looks like and i like what i see and so does he. am i stupid to go through with this? i am married for 6 years but with my husband for 14 years. we were a product of an affair. i am so torn over this.

2007-01-23 08:24:44 · 60 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships Marriage & Divorce

60 answers

IS it worth throwing away a 14 year relationship and 6 year marriage? If you do this your entire life will crumble, your husband will leave and will probaly ddivorce you. resist temtation and say no. be with your husband. you are married for a reason, remind yourself why by looking at photos and videos with him together and reminising.

Just think how you would feel if you were in your husbands shoes. How do you feel? that will stick with you forver if you have a affair. I do not suggest ruinging what you have.

2007-01-23 08:29:44 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 5 0

You are making a huge mistake and possibly, a very dangerous one. You have no idea who this guy really is and you have no way of knowing if anything he tells you is the truth.

As far as meeting him for "sex", you are already "cheating". How would you feel if your husband was doing the same thing behind your back?

Marriage is based on love and respect, turning outside your marriage for any reason is wrong and never solves anything. If you don't want to be married to your husband and don't want to get some professional help to work through your problems, divorce him.

You are selfish and immature, your husband deserves far better than you. He deserves the truth. Instead of thinking of yourself, why not tell your husband how you feel.

Be responsible, act like an adult and end your relationship with your husband BEFORE you go out and jump into bed with a stranger!

How old are you anyway, 15? I wish your husband well, I hope you get caught.

2007-01-23 08:34:37 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 3 0

Yes, you are crazy (temporarily). You are not thinking straight! Get away from this man and clear your mind. Do not go to meet him, you will regret it for the rest of your life. If you are not happy in your marriage, please get some help. Let your husband know what it is in your marriage you are not happy with. Count the blessings that you do have. Do you have children? Think of how this will affect them. I am not trying to give you heck, just trying to get you to wake up. It is normal to be attracted to other people besides your spouse, but it is what you do about it that counts. If your relationship was a product of an affair you already know the consequences. Why would you want to go through that again? Stop any contact with this man. By the way, does he know you are married? If he does what kind of guy is he then?

2007-01-23 08:38:15 · answer #3 · answered by wendygirl1000 2 · 1 0

Ok you asked...

Once a cheater always a cheater, what you say and do doesn't surprise me. That's why I don't cheat myself and won't date cheaters.

Sure you are crazy and completely stupid for taking such a huge risk to meet a complete stranger that you've never met in person? And to top the crazy & stupidity, you're also totally dirty and disgusting to consider having sex with a stranger.

How do you think your daughters would think of their Mom doing this?

I always ask myself what the hell is wrong with people like you? If you can't commit, then why bother getting married in the first place? If you aren't happy and want to cheat then why bother staying married?

And don't give me that mumbo jumbo crap about it's for the kids, because staying with your husband and cheating on him is not doing anything for your kids.

Should you be torn? Yes!

Is the fact that you both were a product of an affair make it okay? No!

You need help, seriously.

2007-01-23 08:35:36 · answer #4 · answered by hw 2 · 3 0

lucy i think that you should be very careful cuz you think nothing can really go wrong but what if you get caught with this man. how will you be with out your husband? There is a saying "you dont know what you have intill you loose it" and it is very true trust me. it has happened to one of my close friend recently she thought well that the other man was worth it and she has a 6 year old and a 8 month old and just 1 week ago she said she made the biggest mistake of her life but sadly her husband dont want to get back with her. In that situation who do you think is suffering? Her! and the time she had with the other man is so over. it was just attraction they had and not a life long thing they wanted. Be carefull and make sure you choose wisely. From: a married women

2007-01-23 09:18:54 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1 0

If your torn over it then don't do it. Cut all contact with this other person. If you really love your husband than you won't have an affair. Do you realize what it will do to him if he finds out that you had an affair with someone that you have only been talking to. He will most likely be hurt and devastated. If you want your marriage to end then have an affair, but remember if you love your husband it's not worth risking your marriage for a night of sex no matter how great it might be.

2007-01-23 08:28:52 · answer #6 · answered by Chrissi 2 · 4 0

You have already crossed the line in your marriage so why not go and have some fun.
just be sure to take a 'whorez kit' with you meaning if you shower and the hotel (which you should) dont use the hotel soap as your husband might notice....so take a bar of soap and deodorant and a thing of toothpaste and a toothbrush with you. Put them in your purse so you can toss them out before you get home. put a new pair of underwear in there too just in case.
call your girlfriends in advance and make sure that they dont accidently call you. Make up a friend if needed and go shopping with her (since she is part of your imagination, she wont call)
go to the store after work one day and buy some stuff so you wont come back home with no packages.
Stop at the drugstore on your way there and buy condoms (pay cash)...
start complaining about your cellphone now (so your husband wont be suspicious if he calls and you dont answer your phone)
Have fun
dont stay longer than a few hours
or even better call in sick to work and go and spend the afternoon there

2007-01-23 08:48:58 · answer #7 · answered by kissmymiddlefinger 5 · 0 1

I guess you have to decide what kind of person you are. You made a commitment to your husband who trusts you. So are you trustworthy or not? Will you feel proud of yourself for having an affair? Is this how your husband should treat you? You'd be OK with your husband doing the same? It's easy to be intresting and exciting and sexy over the internet, but how will it leave you feeling about yourself afterward? Anyone can send a picture, doesn't mean it's really him! I think it would be funny for you to go to meet him and find your husband sitting there! You are already cheating on him emotionaly, does it make you feel good about yourself? I feel so sorry for your husband.....

2007-01-23 08:32:53 · answer #8 · answered by wish I were 6 · 2 0

If you did not think what you are doing is Wong, you would not post a question here and seek approval. No matter what people say, ask yourself this question, "Can I live with my husband lying in his face everyday pretending to be a good wife?" If you can live with this guilt all your life, then you have just doomed your life.

Let your fantasy remain a fantasy, or else you will hurt the ones you love. You may think you do, but you know nothing about this man. if you think this man is that great, then why not leave your husband first and then go with this man. For one afternoon of pleasure you will live in guilt and hurt loved ones for the rest of your life. Having said that, you have to much time on your hand, you need a hobby or need to get a job to keep yourself out of trouble

2007-01-23 08:52:31 · answer #9 · answered by jimmy.parker06 5 · 2 0

Sounds like you have your mind already made up about meeting him at his hotel. Did you ever stop to think that maybe he gave you some pics of him that are 15 year ago or maybe not even him!!! Of course he sounds sexy over the phone! YOUR having phone sex with him!!! Don't throw your marriage away for a stranger that you don't ever know What if he is just playing you? Don't go and be his fool.

2007-01-23 08:41:50 · answer #10 · answered by Bonduesa 6 · 1 0

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