Would you be hurt if your boyfriend/husband didn't get you a birthday gift?
I would rather give than receive ANYDAY. But sometimes it's nice to be spoiled. Not necessarily with something expensive, but with something that took extra thought and effort.
My 25th birthday was last Monday and my (live-in) boyfriend came home from work with a card and a cake (I hate cake and he knows that). Of course I happily accepted the card and cake and appreciated it. But it hurt my feelings that he didn’t put much effort into celebrating my birthday. (I didn't tell him this though)
I moved in with him about 7 months ago, not only did I move in with him but I had to move 2 hrs away from my family to do so. I didn’t have my friends or family to celebrate my birthday with so that is the main reason I was hurt he didn’t put the extra effort in it for me.
2007-01-23 08:12:47 · 8 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
His birthday was two weeks before mine and I got him something he had his eye on for a while and took him out to his favorite restaurant for dinner.
Again, it’s not that I wanted a fancy expensive gift, just something that required him to think instead of just stopping by the local grocery store.
What do you think? I am being a brat or would you be hurt also?
2007-01-23 08:13:01 · update #1
Actually, money is not the issue. He makes plenty of money and extra money from the band that he's in. But again, it wouldn't have mattered if he spent $1 or $1000, I just would have liked something a little more special.
2007-01-23 08:33:39 · update #2
Had you told him in advance that you really would like some kind of celebration for your birthday?
No, it doesn't take the "specialness" out of it to tell someone what you would like. People aren;t mind readers! Especially not guys!! Sometimes, most times, they gotta be hit over the head with a 2x4 (figuratively).
If you want something, then you have to let them know. In advance. Like, sometimes .. months before ... when you are talking about age, or birthdays or whatever, just say, you know what I would like for mynext birthday .... and outline what sounds cool to you. Then repeat it again another time. And again. And again.
If it is important to you, then it is important to communicate it's importance, and what it is you want. Don't leave it up to him to try and figure out what you want .. because he won't!!!
2007-01-24 11:11:59 · answer #1 · answered by Pichi 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, the fact that he got you a cake when he knows you hate it may not be his fault entirely. Guys sometimes hear what we're saying without actually retaining it...lol. Like the other woman said, sometimes men need reminding. I have had to tell my hubby this quite a few times, about being more romantic, surprising, and most of all as you mentioned..original. Any sap can go pick out a $20 rose bouquet out of a cooler, and maybe that does it for some chicks. But it would mean more if you would have just picked out one flower in my favorite type/color. Talk to him, let him know how you feel. That's the key to a good relationship. =)
2007-01-23 08:31:01 · answer #2 · answered by unique2477 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Was there a money issue? My husband and I always talk about holidays before the gift giving...you know just in case we are low on monies or we would rather buy something for the both of us rather than just one of us. We plan trips instead of gifts so that we both can enjoy. Did he give gifts before and now that you moved in he doesn't? Could also be a sign of selfishness if he didn't talk to you about it before hand. My first husband didn't get me a valentines day card or gift and we were still newlyweds. That was a sign of pure selfishness. Divorced within a year.
2007-01-23 08:22:07 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
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2016-11-26 21:40:48 · answer #4 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well to be honest--it took my hubby 7 years to do anything for me! He's a guy isn't he? I finally told my hubby if he didn't do anything for me on MY special day I would kick his @ss! Sometimes they just need to be told how you feel! And don't feel bad about having to tell him! Again---He's not a mind reader, and he IS a MAN!
2007-01-23 08:24:25 · answer #5 · answered by purpledragonflyjrh 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yeah i would feel hurt but if u know he loves u, u don't need a gift for him to show u he loves u!
2007-01-23 08:22:48 · answer #6 · answered by twisted angel 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
he could have done a little more
2007-01-23 08:16:40 · answer #7 · answered by EmmaNicole 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
no
2007-01-23 08:22:29 · answer #8 · answered by jerry 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋