OK, here is the delema. When I met my b/f 3 1/2 yrs ago he was paying his ex a huge amount of money for child support and arrearage (60% of his paycheck). He's not a deadbeat dad he just made a mistake. After our son was born the courts so generously dropped her take down to 50%. Now after more than 4 years and 3 months in jail over this the arrearag is paid and his oldest child has turned 18.
The problem is that because she gets so much of his money we barely make enough both working full time to pay our bills so there is no way we can even think about hiring a lawyer. His court appointed lawyer won't return his calls. And he tried filing the papers himself and was told that his lawyer had to do it.
She used to drag him into court every 3-6 months for a "review" but now that her free ride is about to end she is in no hurry to get into court again.
We can't afford to hire a lawyer, he can't do it without a lawyer and his appointed lawyer can't be bothered. What do we do?
2007-01-23 06:50:20 · 11 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I don't want to hear from anyone who says she needs all that child support because she has been paid what he owed her 3 times over. Her and her kids live like royalty and we can't afford food
2007-01-23 06:52:11 · update #1
He has 3 children and in MA if you owe arrears they can take up to 60% of your pay if you have no other depentants (50% if you do) The arrearage is paid but they keep taking it out of his check. And (to Been there's answer) if you actually read the question we both work full time jobs and he is paying her money he NO LONGER OWES HER.
What we need to go to court for is to get the arrearage amount taken off and have the base child support lowered becasue 1 of his 3 children turned 18
2007-01-23 07:26:59 · update #2
god i can commiserate with you.and to all who answered-my bf is paying 55% of his income for child support for 2 kids(the legal max in PA).i know alot coz my sister works for domestic relations.if the youngest child turns 18 and/or graduates he no longer has to pay. all i can think is he is/will be paying arrearges? all you hear is about "deadbeat dads". you never hear about the guy who is faithfully paying and driving a 20 yr old beater-living on mac and cheese and living in fear that any extra dime he makes goes to HER> and i say HER because there is no accountability, your kids can be walking around in rags while she uses the money for her new car payment and new clothes for HERSELF>.and if she remarries or has a live in bf, he can be a millionaire but that has no bearing.the dad is always the bad guy no matter what.what i find really stupid is putting these guys in jail who get behind on payments-counterproductive to say the least. if he aint working and in jail..how the hell is he supposed to pay??? (which btw, if you have a job and a ss#-it will automatically be deducted from your paycheck)..id have him call them and remind them about the child turning 18. and how behind he is. good luck. my heart goes out to you.
TO BONDGIRL:
the bottom line is the child support system is hopelessly flawed. legislators dont come to bat for them because its not in the popular consensus. we are to perpetually believe that these are poor, single mothers scraping by when quite the opposite is true in most cases. another thing, when half your income is gone, and you are barely surviving, sometimes you dont even have the money to have your kids to visit to even feed them. let alone buy presents for them on birthdays, christmas etc.so another thing the "system" does is alienate children even more from their fathers.
2007-01-23 07:22:03 · answer #1 · answered by itsme2003 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
There may be a group in your area that just deals with child support enforcement. It's usually handled by the state. If there is an agreement on child support now, then they can bring the guy in and force him to pay or make him go to jail while working to pay support. If there is no child support enforced now, then you have to go to the court house and find the forms you need to fill out to take him to court. They will need a paternity test to prove he's the father and then enforce the child support. They will force him to find employment.
2016-05-24 01:27:00 · answer #2 · answered by Sandra 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You don't have to go back to court to stop the child support. Just drop a note to the friend of the court to remind them the child is turning 18. If they are still in high school he may have to pay until the child reaches 19 or graduates.
2007-01-23 07:00:24 · answer #3 · answered by ladyluc39 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Even a court appointed lawyer can be fired and you can get another. Try asking the court in your area what agencies there are for low income or sliding scale lawyers. Believe it or not child support services will give you good advice too.
2007-01-23 07:05:53 · answer #4 · answered by indianola_gurl 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
There's probably a legal aid society in your area--get a referral from an attorney's office. They usually charge on a sliding scale. If that doesn't pan out, call the state bar assoc. for a referral for a domestic attorney willing to do 'pro bono' work. He has the right to represent himself, but that's probably not a good idea. He could also contact her attorney to ask if he'd be willing to prepare an agreed order reducing the amount of child support and paying him the fees for doing so. Good Luck
2007-01-23 06:58:24 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Some information is missing here. How many children does he have that he pays so much child support. The maximum is 30% of gross income in any state, so how can he be paying 60%?
2007-01-23 06:56:22 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You married a man that had prior responsibilites. It isn't her fault that he has made poor choices in life. I would think that there is some sort of supervisor/dept. for this legal representative. If he won't return the calls - I would submit a statement to the court, so the judge can be made aware. I get fed up with second wives thinking that when they bear children, they should take presidence. WHEN HE HAS A PAST --- BEWARE.
2007-01-23 07:33:36 · answer #7 · answered by Bondgirl 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋
You should be able to file the papers yourself because the child will no longer be a minor. I don't know where you live so I can't tell you who to contact, go online and research statutes relating to the support of non-minor children in your state.
2007-01-23 07:05:12 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I dont understand that percentage. The highest in NY state is 17% for one child. If there are arrears, it still cannot be above a certain percentage. Are you sure there isnt something he isnt telling you here?
2007-01-23 06:57:52 · answer #9 · answered by Jay Jay 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He is your boyfriend......He ain't your husband He owes His ex-wife and child no matter what his new situation is......I am living this life right now, my husband has an ex and a beautiful daughter and I will not come between a dad and his child..........Go get a job. You can go buy food.
My friend who is reading this right now says that this is not true.....if it is He owes Back Child Support.
2007-01-23 06:57:14 · answer #10 · answered by Been There Done That 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋