I don't believe in hitting children so please do not say for me to do that.
My 13 year old daughter has developed a severe attitude problem. I need some suggestions on how to deal with her when it comes to this problem.
2007-01-23 05:51:46 · 24 answers · asked by Miss.Sunshine 3 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Adolescent
I would take away things 1 by 1 of hers that she really likes or wants, such as a mobile phones ect. then when she's got the point - give them back 1 by 1 and hopefully she'll get the message!
2007-01-23 05:57:18 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I have the same problem with my 2 boys...11 and 12. My older son has had alot of issues and is now taking it to school with him. He was in the principals office yesterday for acting out at school. I have done all of the things suggested and for a kid who doesn't care, it really doesn't work very well. The thing I am concerned with is when the attitude turns to violence, like what is happening with him...My younger son has the attitude, but he is much more controllable, due to the fact that he is a mommy's boy.
2007-01-24 06:23:23 · answer #2 · answered by BRIDGIE74 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Attitude is part of her and your life now that she is a teen. I am a nanny for 5 teens and some days I just laugh at the tude they give me. If they give it and I am doing something nice for them I stop and sometimes they realize they are not being nice and they will stop and say sorry. Sometimes if I know they need to go somewhere I will threaten not to take they but if they keep up you have to follow through. It will not stop the tude but will make them see what butt heads they are being. The mom I work for believes only her kids do this and they are doing this to hurt her. I tell her ALL the time that this is not true every teen goes through it. They do. Didn't you? A lot of times also they are trying to **** you off. I do laugh when I get lots of attitude form them, like I can not believe you just said that. Makes them mad but i laugh so...........
2007-01-23 06:03:34 · answer #3 · answered by Shelli Belle 2 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Warn her that if she keeps behaving this way that she's going to lose privileges. What does she love? Her cell phone? Going to parties? Shopping? Using the house phone? Going online? Watching TV? Does she have a favourite outfit or make up? Warn her that if she is rude then she loses it for a week. Make sure you're firm - if she is rude, she is punished for the full length of time with no relenting. Young teens sense weakness, so be strong! If you've tried this and it doesn't work, make her punishments more severe. She loses her phone for 2 weeks instead of one. Make sure she knows what it is you don't tolerate, though. It's no use punishing if she doesn't know why it's happening. Try to explain to her why you're doing it, and ignore any tantrums. Teenagers scream a lot, and they always know best. Be prepared!
2007-01-23 05:58:46 · answer #4 · answered by Emily 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Ill be interested to know the answer too!! I have a 12 year old boy and a 10 year old girl and the attitude is starting. Its very hard. You have to be cruel to be kind I suppose and stop them from doing the things that they enjoy?? Ill look at the answers with interest!!
2007-01-23 05:55:45 · answer #5 · answered by cat1967 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
My stepdaughter is 12 and she has the attitude you have to nip it in the bud now and let her know what you expect. Try not to yell back that is what they want it seems. Just start taking things away from them. Be consistent if you aren't she won't believe you are going to do anything to her when she misbehaves taking things away at this age is much more effective then anything else.; Good luck and God bless
2007-01-23 13:38:13 · answer #6 · answered by chiefs fan 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Give her attitude back. Tell her that when she treats you with respect you will do the same to her. Whatever you do don't ignore it, my sister tried that and now she has a 20 year old son that's disrespectful to her only because he knows she's an easy target and that he can get away with it.
2007-01-23 08:18:58 · answer #7 · answered by Pinky Lee 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Whenever she talks to you with attitude tell her she has a choice to re-phrase it in a respectful tone or go to her room. If she gives you lip then take a privilege away, like computer use for one day (or tv, phone, cell, stereo---anything she values), if she continues, ask her if she'd like to make it two days, continue taking computer use away until she goes to her room or talks to you in a respectful manner. If her room has everything (tv, computer, phone, stereo) then send her to the dining room or to your room (my room is bare compared to my teens). The point is to send her some place where she has to sit and think and no diversions. My son would do this and then after a few weeks he'd start to say something with attitude and see my expression and stop and speak to me in a respectful manner. It's going to take awhile and you're going to have to be consistent and follow through. If you say you've lost tv watching for three days then don't give it, make sure it's three days even if you have to take it out of their room. Be strong and assertive (don't waiver). It'll be worth it in the end. A few weeks of unpleasantness for five more years with a respectful teenager. Also, please don't yell, be calm and model the type of behavior you'd expect from them. Good Luck!
2007-01-23 06:24:17 · answer #8 · answered by Kimmi 3 · 4⤊ 0⤋
If she is just being snotty or snippy, I'd just refuse to buy her something in the near future that she wants, and tell her that she can't expect you to be nice to her if she can't even treat you with courtesy.
Most teenagers go through this phase, and most of them eventually see the advantages of courtesy. Remember, adolescence is never easy. It is highly stressful, and it is unreasonable to expect a 13 year old to always hold it in.
It is a different story if she is doing things that are actually endangering her. You weren't specific.
2007-01-23 07:08:07 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
Good communication - tell her what is acceptable behaviour and what isn't. Adequate consequences - tell her what will happen when she displays unacceptable behaviour - take away privileges, grounding, more chores, etc. If the given consequences don't change the behaviour, up the consequences. Consistency - ALWAYS follow through on what you say and follow through immediately after rule has been broken.
2007-01-23 05:58:49 · answer #10 · answered by chicchick 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋