I recently found my old high school gf we have not seen or kept in touch in the last 30 years. I am married she is divorced, at first I thought I had some strong feelings for her, but I do not. I just want to be her friend. She told me she was dating a guy, but that they are not close and she is having financial trouble. he has not offered to help. she did not ask me to, but I sent her a little money to help out. now she hasn't spoken to me since?????
2007-01-23 00:54:24 · 13 answers · asked by Mike S 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
It would depend on what was said on the first meeting after years apart. When you sent the money, did you tell her that it was strictly as a friend and that the money was being lent to her?
I would guess that she is confused/concerned about your feelings now and not mad with you. Did she accept the money? Was it a loan?
If you want to help her, ask her is she needs help. That way there is no ambiguity. For now, just call her and let her know that you wanted to help, but that you hoped it had not offended her. If it offended her, apologise and don't send money again.
2007-01-23 01:02:13 · answer #1 · answered by Developing Minds 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think u have bigger questions than this.......such as why if u are married would u be looking up your old gf after 30 years and u thought u had strong feelings for her??? where did this come from? Anyhow as far as your question goes .......are u sure she received the money? I don't see any reason why she should be upset about that. Another scenario may be that the guy she is currently dating found out that u sent her money and told her not to contact u. Certain guys may not offer to help their gf's with money problems, but they certainly don't want some other guy helping them out, that hurts their egos. Anyhow good luck, but I really do hope u look at your own life and try to improve that rather than worrying about someone from a lifetime ago.
2007-01-23 01:05:26 · answer #2 · answered by Amber 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would feel very awkward.
You said you found her...why were you looking for her? You had better hope that your wife doesn't find out.
First, reverse the situation and see how you would respond if you found out your wife had done this.
Secondly, if I were your wife I'd be kicking your a** up and down the block. You gave money to an ex-girlfriend you haven't seen in 30 years, didn't discuss the expenditure with me (probably because you knew I'd start lacing up my a** kicking boots), then seem hurt to find out you've been duped by the old girlfriend.
I don't want to be rude, but do you understand how ridiculous this sounds?
2007-01-23 01:21:37 · answer #3 · answered by Le_Roche 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
WOw........to find an old g/friend you havnt seen or heard from in 30yrs must have been a blast from the past.........as for Helping her out financially that was "sweet" of you.......but you honestly don't know this person anymore or what life they've lived for 30yrs.......You did a Kind thing and helped her by sending a lil money but now you've done your good deed for the year.......Forget about her and move on with your life and YOUR WIFE*
obviously your long lost g/friend from the past seems to be quite LOST and needs to find her own journey back to reality*but not with your help or you'll end up being on a journey all on your own with out your wife*GOODLUCK
2007-01-23 01:01:42 · answer #4 · answered by friskymisty01 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm sorry to say that I would probably be a little offended too. Maybe she is very independent and doesn't want any help. Personally I'd rather go bankrupt than accept money from an old boyfriend. How does your wife feel about this?
2007-01-23 01:23:31 · answer #5 · answered by spelling nazi 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Does your wife know that you sent this money to her??
This girl may feel a bit awkward getting money from you since you haven't seen each other in quite some time.
Maybe she will think your wife will be angry or something, really hard to say what she is feeling.
It was very nice of you to do that, but it offends some people.
I wouldn't want my hubby giving his ex money though.
2007-01-23 01:05:36 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
No I would not be offended. Maybe she's confused as to your meaning behind the gesture. Perhaps tearful, joyful, overwhelmed, embarrassed, at a lose for words. Did you send a note or just money? It's best to send her a note (if she wont return your calls, let her know your intentions were noble and heartfelt friendship and that you care for her in this way only and hope you did not offend her. I think what you did was great. Bless you for caring.
2007-01-23 01:11:58 · answer #7 · answered by whateverhohum 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She probably feels a little awkward about it, wondering if this changes your relationship. It's always a little weird feeling like you owe your friend. I would give her a call and not talk about the money at all, you don't want to make her feel bad about it.
2007-01-23 01:03:24 · answer #8 · answered by Jennylind 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
heck no i wouldn't be mad ata ll but you might of upset her and she os feeling bad that you felt that you needed to help her out some people don't like others helping them out she might feel like she owes you something now. she might also think that you are interested in her and she is not you for the fact that you are married and don't want to cause no problems. just ask her what is going on and that you ment nothing by sending her money except just to help her out some
2007-01-23 01:07:44 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I wonder why she hasnt spoken to u since? Umm never lend money to friends. It was very kind of you but look where it has gotten you.
How does your wife feel about you lending money our to old girlfriends? I know I wouldnt like that.
she got what she wanted out of you, beware next time.
2007-01-23 01:04:06 · answer #10 · answered by Hi my name is... 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋