My husband and I have talked about him getting a job as a trucker. How do you deal with the long stretches apart? If trucking is what he wants then I want to support him but I'm afraid of the emotional toll it will take. Any suggestions? Any comments?
2007-01-23 00:17:20 · 6 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I was a truckers wife.. my husband was a car hauler.. and was away from home more so then he was home..most weeks.. and when he was home, he was exhausted.. it was very hard at first to get use to ..but after awhile it became the norm.. fortunately my husband did alot of short hauls to where he was home 3 days a week, alot of truckers go out for weeks at a time depending on what their hauling.. the pay is usually good, its better in car hauling then any other (my husband has done alittle of everything in the past and liked car hauling the best) We had cell phones that had the direct connect (walkie talkie ) on them.. and we talked to each other on and off through out the day and that helped alot.. so id definately get cell phones that have that feature.. because u can get unlimited direct connect to where u can talk all day if u wanted and it wont cost u anything.. and u and him have to agree, no matter how good the money is.. that if this starts tearing away at ur marriage.. that your marriage comes first and that he'll come off the road..
My husband came off the road after 13 years of being a truck driver.. he was tired of missing us (me and our family) but theres a part of him that will always miss the road..
2007-01-23 00:26:32 · answer #1 · answered by brwneyedgrl 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Most trucking companies, claim they will get their driver's home every week or 2. They may do this for a month or two, and then you'll find your husband out on the road 6-8 weeks at a time.
Alot of women think trucker's are the biggest cheaters. This isn't so. Trucker's are so busy these days dealing with paperwork, dispatchers, fueling their rigs, and driving and waiting to load and unload they don't have time for anything but work.
It is difficult on the spouse that is left at home, however, if you don't have young children, most companies allow spouses to join the husband on some of his runs.
Generally it's best if a driver can find a local driving job one that will allow him to be home every day or two or even daily. I would recommend that as in the long run, they make more money driving local (within 100 miles) of home than those drivers that drive cross country long haul.
Why this is, is simply because of the cost of living out on the road, meals, showers, etc. How i know this is i drove truck for many years and the only time i made a good living was when i worked as a local driver driving belly dumps for construction projects.
2007-01-23 08:28:26 · answer #2 · answered by michael_trussell 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
My husband was a truck driver when we met. He came off the road before we got married. I was sooo glad, because it would about kill me every time he would have to leave. I would cry for hours and sometimes days. He was long haul and would be gone for two weeks at a time. They would tell him that he would be home on such and such day, but when it was time for him to start back this way, they would be trying to send him some place else. It was a fight every two weeks to try to get home on the day he was supposed to. That's why he quit.
I always worried that something tragic would happen to him or that he'd meet someone else. In other words, everytime he left, I was affraid that I'd never see him again. He's thinking about going back to it all the time, for the money in it. I don't know if I could handle that again. It would be worse now than ever before. We've only been married for 8 months, and now I've gotten even more attached to his holding, cuddling, kissing and loving.
If missing him is not going to eat your heart right out of you, then you may be able to handle it. I guess I'm just too attached.
Good Luck.
2007-01-23 09:55:56 · answer #3 · answered by Angel L 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hey Mandy, I am a trucker. I used to drive over the road for a while. Currently I have a job driving cement truck so I'm home everynight, but I know about the stresses of being on the road and away from home.
If you don't have kids yet it may be easier because you may be able to go on the road with him. Otherwise if your not able to, it can be some long stretches on the road. Most trucking companies out there usually try to have the drivers out a min. of a week, but there are some where drivers are out 2-3 weeks at a time, and when they get home time, it may be fore a few days.
My dad used to drive truck otr when I was little, shortly before I started school. What was nice was I was able to ride along with him so I got to spend time with him, but it got hard for Dad being away from home. He drove otr for 3 years. But gave it up to take a job working on a farm outside of my hometown.
If your husband can get his CDL and if possible maybe find a local job where he's home every night.
My wife doesn't mind me wanting to drive otr again, but if I do go back it's going to be after the kids are grown up and moved out so she can go on the road with me.
But for right now my wife doesn't want me to go back otr, because it was alot of stress on her being both mom & dad while I was on the road.
Emotionally it's not an easy life being a truckers wife. But my suggestion is sit down and talk about it with him, share your concerns.
I wish you the best and hope that whatever the 2 of you decide works out for the best for you.
Take care and God Bless
2007-01-23 08:42:40 · answer #4 · answered by Bryan M 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My experiences from being married to a trucker aren't so pretty.
He thought it was ok for him to be picking up the trucking stops hookers and getting what he said he was missing from me!
OK SO where the hell was I suppose to be getting it?
Needless to say.........my marriage ended and I refuse to ever get involved with a trucker again!
2007-01-23 08:37:49 · answer #5 · answered by peggin_beast 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i've seen one mom actually have an affair on the guy....but i've seen another couple actually tag along together for the ride....everybody has their own story to tell....take things day by day and you'll find out if it's manageable for you and him....if it ain't, make another change...there are challenges in life, this is one of your many challenges, but not a serious one, just another one.
2007-01-23 08:23:06 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋