Ok, my friend just found out that I am pregnant with my third child. She has been ttc since the day she got married almost 3 years ago. She has tried invetro and at one time 6 eggs planted and then a few weeks later she lost them all. I cant even imagin the pain she is going through. I never once try and throw my family or kids in her face and when I talk to her, I dont even bring them up. I dont know how to talk to her anymore, nor do I know if she even wants to talk to me. We were really good friends and I miss talking to her and her friendship. Her mom make rude comments about me to my mom like " well this is kristin's third and my daughter just wants one". It really hurts my feelings and I dont know what to say to her because I dont wanna hurt her more. I have cried long enough about this now, and I need advise on ways I can talk to her and make sure that whats left of our friendship is not gone. How can I talk to her without hurting her or bring up a sentive subject. Thanks
2007-01-22 23:33:35 · 4 answers · asked by kristin h 3 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Trying to Conceive
I have thought about being a surrgant mother for her, but than I became pregnant with this baby. I am almost 11 weeks and I just dont wanna say anything about that to her yet because it would be a while before I could do that. I would have to heal and everything. That is something I have been giving thought about, I just dont wanna get myself into something that will be harder for me to deal with. I will just have to see what time brings. Thanks for answers.
2007-01-23 00:33:54 · update #1
be honest and open with her. remember that what you feel strongly about is important to express. don't sugar coat everything, and don't come on too strong.
2007-01-23 00:22:27 · answer #1 · answered by ttcdayandnight 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
She is going through a lot of pain, and you cannot understand her pain. You can however, still be friends. It is O.K. to be excited about your children. If you try to avoid talking about them, she will sense that you are tense about it, which could make her uncomfortable. Maybe your mom could tell her mom that it hurts your feelings that she would say those things. The mom probably doesn't understand what her daughter is going through either. I have been ttc for 6 years, and everyone seems to think they know what it is like. If you have not been there-- you don't. Just don't try to act like you do. It isn't your fault she cannot concieve. I'm sure she realizes that. Just be encouraging. That's what she needs.
2007-01-23 10:38:24 · answer #2 · answered by ChayChay 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My advice would be to just sit down with her & talk about it. If she is your friend, they y'all can talk about it. Tell her how you are feeling, ask her how she is feeling. Deep down, she may resent you, but she also knows it's luck of the draw & you aren't intentionally doing this.
I have a sister in law who has miscarried twice and is quite vitriolic about other women who are pregnant. If your friends is like that, then I would steer clear of it.
2007-01-23 07:41:22 · answer #3 · answered by kelly24592 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Would you/she consider being a surrogate mother for her????
2007-01-23 08:22:52 · answer #4 · answered by Skiri 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋