My girlfriend of 10 years refuses to marry me. (Gay marriages have only just become legal in my country.)
Am I right in feeling that if she refuses to marry me, then why is she even WITH me??
(Probably just a PMS rant, but it's how I'm feeling...)
2007-01-22 22:09:33 · 12 answers · asked by Angelpaws 5 in Society & Culture ➔ Cultures & Groups ➔ Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender
I DID propose to her - ten years ago. And she said yes. But gay marriages weren't legal yet back then - they only became legal last month (December 2006). So she's actually had TEN YEARS to consider my proposal.
And we HAVE tried to speak about it - but she refuses to tell me why she won't marry me. She says she has issues, but she's working through them. That's all I get out of her on the subject.
2007-01-23 15:46:33 · update #1
"If it aint broke - don't fix it." springs to mind.
My brother broke up with his girlfriend of 17 years, after they decided to get married.
2007-01-22 22:17:02 · answer #1 · answered by unclefrunk 7 · 3⤊ 0⤋
well all i can tell you is me and my boyfriend would both love to get married, but not only do we live in The USA we live in utah, the mormon vatican. however allot of gay people have been conditioned to not believe in marriage altogether i know allot of my friends who dont want to get married based on the fact that we are basically having to wait for str8 people to give us permission before we can. also for the past ten years you have been with your girlfriend she has probably resigned herself to happiness just the way things are, i dont know how old you are but it may be some kind of midlife crisis thing. I personally would be happy that she is at least giving it some thought anyone who imediately accepts a proposal the minute it is given scares me marriage is huge even if you have been together for a long time because if you think about gays around the world have been given the impression that all gays are promiscuous and unable to commit so gay culture has evolved to fit that stereotype. this is unfortunate that this has been engraved into our social situation so much that it seems like everyone is either adamantly for it or against it i am personally happy with the way things are but as soon as i can get out of the usa i will be getting married with my boyfriend and I am sure i will live happily ever after
The end
P.S. sorry for the long winded diatribe
2007-01-22 22:21:11 · answer #2 · answered by blakey383 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
some gays just dont want to marry, even when it becomes an option to them, just like str8s.
i dunno if its a commitment phobia or a dislike of the "institution of marriage" etc etc but if you love each other, is that not enough? does it have to be concretised publically to make it valid? i get how you feel, but dont throw away a great r/ship (if it is great that is, otherwise get out of there if you're miserable) because of this issue...it might change over time, it might not. enjoy the moment.
2007-01-22 22:21:09 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I know a gay guy and he just is not into getting married even if it was recognized in this state.
2007-01-23 00:46:03 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I can see why you would be hurt/offended. I think before you let your feelings get out of control however you need to sit down with her and ask why she feels that way and her reasoning. Maybe you will see where she is coming from, or if she is afraid.
2007-01-22 22:19:31 · answer #5 · answered by Breein 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I can understand your frustration. Seems that there may be some other issues in the relationship that the two of you need to address.
2007-01-22 22:48:37 · answer #6 · answered by MaryCheneysAccessory 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Give her some time to process your proposal, than ask again
2007-01-23 02:24:05 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just talk to her ...find out why she feels that way, it seem right or it might just piss you off more.....good luck
2007-01-23 09:04:46 · answer #8 · answered by Jake M. 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
How about asking her why she said no?
2007-01-23 05:41:37 · answer #9 · answered by carora13 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
AM STRAIGHT, SO CANNOT ANSWER YOU THERE, AS YOUR ISSUES ARE THICKER THAN NORMAL...........
BUT RESPECT YOUR PARTNER, I WOULD SAY.
2007-01-22 22:15:34 · answer #10 · answered by Sarang 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋