I am 25yrs old Female from Chennai, India. My parents decided to seek alliance for me, started getting more proposals too. But I am in love with a guy who is entirely different from my caste and culture, he is from Kerala. I then told my parents bout my love, in this case my mom accepted, but my dad dint. now he is giving me more tortures to get rid of that guy. me explained alot about my willingness but still he is not ready to hear my words. in home, he is ill-treating me alot. at the same time, I cant leave my parents and go get married juz like that, coz only I've to look after them. I am havig only one elder brother who is in Staffordshire, UK. I told him all abt my problems, he told that he'll be coming to India by the month of May. Till then, what shall I do? informing you, my dad is a Heart patient and my dad will never ever give up from his decision, so, there is no chance of convincing him. he also stopped me goin for work. I cant marry any1 except him. plz help me my friend
2007-01-22 19:09:18 · 7 answers · asked by Veena 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
I'm sorry to hear about your trouble but I can also understand that it is part of your culture to have arranged marriages. Since your dad is a heart patient I would not suggest that you do anything that could bring harm to him. Tell the man that you love to give you time until your brother gets there and convinces your dad with your help that you want someone else and the person you want will treat you good and take care of you the way he'd want you taken care of.
Also have your mom talk to him and try to put off your wedding with the man he has chosen for you for as long as possible until your brother gets there, if at all possible also ask your brother to try and see if he can make it there faster as you need his help before your father realises what you and your mother are really up to. If all else fail then I would suggest telling the man chosen for you that you don't love him and marrying him would cause great unhappiness to the both of you and just try and convince him to back off with the help of your mother and brother without your father finding out.
Whatever you do though don't put your life, that of the man you love, the one whom was chosen for you or your family's lives in danger. Think of all the pros and the cons before making any other moves if all else fails.
2007-01-22 19:19:22 · answer #1 · answered by angel h 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Tell ur dad u love him but u are old enough to decide for urself, u live ur own life and he is not living it for u. Talk some sense into him, maybe u cld say, one day if he is not around, ur the one suffering cos u've married someone u did not love at all, out of force...anyways, you have a choice and u shld make it and live wit it...parents aren't always right..juz need to convince them and proof them wrong sometimes. Do what u think it's best. All the best.
2007-01-23 03:32:26 · answer #2 · answered by DooGie 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is a tricky situation as you dont want to hurt any one but you cant live the rest of your life with some one you dont want to, you will then forever be unhappy. I think if you tell your parents how much you love him and he cares for you then they might see for them selfs, but i would run off with your love as your parents will come around eventually and accept the fact that they cant control your life. Say it is no disrespect to them but you have made this decision for you. And like i said they should accept it. Good luck and hope everything works out for you xx
2007-01-23 03:24:40 · answer #3 · answered by Kimmy xx 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think that you must follow your hart advise because 18 years ago i came to the u.s for the same reason and NOW F/36 i work, i take care of them and i am not married yet because i don't want too, but i am an independent human being AND I HAVE LEARNED that have the right to make my own decisions
2007-01-23 03:19:20 · answer #4 · answered by cochocheto 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Can your boyfriend come and meet your dad. i think it will convince him that your choice is genuine.Otherwise you will have to wait for your brother to interfere.
2007-01-23 03:16:37 · answer #5 · answered by ANU U 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Dump your bf
2007-01-24 08:35:27 · answer #6 · answered by pinkfreud(aruninte.blogspot.com) 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
just marry, get him heart attack,you will inherit every penny,enjoy your life
2007-01-23 03:24:30 · answer #7 · answered by Ehab B. 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋