i broke up w/ mah ex about 3 yrs ago and we r friends since then. we had been goin out for like 3 months and she had to move far away w/ her parents. i kept the long distance relationship for another 4 months.i broke w/ her cuz we started to have more fights and got even worse cuz of long distance.there are other reasons why i broke up but i always luv her until now. i talk to her on the phone once in a while. i am confused cuz even though
i luv her so much, i dont wanna be w/ her cuz i dont see her as mah ideal future wife. i dont know if i could find somebody whom i could luv so much but i cant be w/ her cuz i would always be unhappy thinkin that this is not exactly wat i wanted in mah wife. i luv everything about her but stil dont see the perfect compatibility between us. i am 23 and will get married after 5 yrs or so. should i be w/ her and see how things work or let it go the way its been goin?
2007-01-22 18:56:36 · 5 answers · asked by chun l 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
You're only 23 - in five years you'll only be 27. Life has a way of spinning you around, so having some arbitrary age by which you feel you must be married is potentially setting yourself up for disappointment. IF you get married, do it when the right time with the right person happens...not because you've got some magical age in your head.
As for the situation with your ex - it's great that the two of you can be friends, but you broke up for a reason (or a few reasons). There's a reason why it's called breaking up - because it's BROKEN. If you still care about this person romantically and it's inhibiting your ability to go out with other people and socialize, then perhaps you need to reconsider whether continuing the friendship is the best thing for you.
Sometimes people come into our lives for a while, but aren't meant to be in our lives always. I just "knew" I'd wind up marrying the guy I dated for over 4 years, starting when we were in our teens. I was wrong - it never happened. A LOT can change as we get older...friendships, relationships, ourselves.
If you can't let this girl go romantically, you might need some distance from her friendship so you CAN break that heartstring that's holding you back from moving on with your life.
2007-01-22 19:04:24 · answer #1 · answered by zoni_tonya 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think statistically long distant relationships are hard. You are very young. I would say to you that if you don't plan to reside in the same city as her than its a wash. No person is perfect but you have to decide what you are looking for and be willing to accept a persons imperfections. I am not saying to settle, but to be realistic.
2007-01-23 03:06:14 · answer #2 · answered by aprildin 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i like the way you thinks. you are considering marriage when you consider dating. good man. if you can allready tell that you wont be happy with her... move on. you will find someone else. starting over is never easy. but the 65% divorce rate in this country is also not easy. find a woman you are compatible with and always remind her she is your one and only. remember that childhood chant 1st comes love then comes marriage. people seem to forget what the order is suppose to be. you have not forgotten. good man. now find a good woman.
2007-01-23 03:03:21 · answer #3 · answered by ed c 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I read what u wrote here and i think u pretty much u know that she is not the one for you and as long as u are with her u can't look for that special soulmate that u are seeking. good luck and hope this helps?
2007-01-23 03:03:29 · answer #4 · answered by justice4heather 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
did you seriously just use "whom" and "mah" in the same sentence?
my goodness...
as for your question- if you are having doubts now, take that as a SIGN
2007-01-23 03:01:39 · answer #5 · answered by Jessabeth 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋