Anyways, I am wondering if I should get out of this relationship (we have a child) before my self esteem and sanity, go right out the window. He is always "forgetting" what I ask or say to him, yet he will remember anything to do with sexual activity.
He never listens to me unless the word sex in it, otherwise Im talking to a brick wall.
The only thing that will send his temper through the roof (and he will make me look like the bad guy) is if you refuse to have sex with him, anything else doesnt even come close.
When I was 8 months pregant, he tried to kill me by strangulation (he makse it sound less serious than it was) I gave him a second chance (i know stupid), to this day he doesnt show any remorse for it, he just says "sorry" with no real emotion.
Looking back for the last 3 years, I have realised that I wasnt ever happy,just "rolling over"....I want out, I have told him and he threatens to take my son away. I dont know what to do, cause I am a stay home mom.
2007-01-22 17:24:00 · 9 answers · asked by Anonymous in Social Science ➔ Psychology
get a lawyer. Tell him how dangerous it may be to have your son live with a father that tried to kill a pregnant mother.
2007-01-22 17:27:21 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Take a deep breath dear and calm down, as i read your story i thought i was looking at my story (of course not the strangling part), i don't know what to tell you other than what i think is that MEN could be insensitive sometimes (or most of the time if i may say), my husband used to be the same too, he still does treat me sometimes like i'm just another sofa inside the house but i'm working on improving the way he treats me. dont listen to the other answer, i know what your going though is tough, i've been there, but still take things easy hear it from me sweety, try to calm yourself down most of the time, try knitting or reading anything that would keep you calm and take your mind off of thinking about the nasty things that he has done to you. when he gets back from work, TRY i know it's hard when you're angry and resentful, try to welcome him with a smile, don't whine or nag, alwasy choose the right timing to talk to him about what bothers you, and sometime you gotta let go of some things, i used to be very angry at my husband that as soon as he gets home i look for a little thing to start a fight and feel better, now i realised i was wrong, i changed, and he's gradually changing for the better as well. try to be positive, you may think i'm just talking bull here, but trust me, it'll work, if he forgets something you asked him to do or get, smile back and ask him to do what he forgot to do or so. men are like kids dear, if a kid throws a tantrum, try screaming and shouting, he'll get worse, but if you talk to a kid nicely and calm him quietly, you see a huge difference. EXACT SAME THING WITH MEN believe me, take my word. try to fix what you have, you've got a baby involoved, threatening with divorce and all isn't a good idea. please, try to sit with yourself first, see what you can do to make your marriage better, then talk to him about the things that he does and annoys you. i'm sure it'll all be good. i wish you all the best dear, take care!
2007-01-22 17:41:47 · answer #2 · answered by Sweet Lucifer 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Please don't listen to the people that are posting saying it's your fault he hit you, or that you should stay with someone who has abused you.
There is NEVER a good reason to hit anyone. He is a coward of a man. You do need to leave but i understand your fear because you don't have income bveing a stay at home mom. Here in Washington State there is a domestic violence helpline called
D.A.W.N. ( domestic abuse womens network) if they are not in your area then call your local crisis line, they will give you help. You can also talk to your DR about resourses. Find a friend to walk through this with you. If not a personal friend then someone from an agency. And DO NOT tell your husband you are leaving or getting help.
Best Wishes to you.
2007-01-22 18:37:21 · answer #3 · answered by Teresa t 5 · 2⤊ 1⤋
don't threaten to leave. just leave, without any traces, notes, etc. go to a friend's, your mother, a shelter, whatever, just get out and make sure he does not find you. and then, only then, call the lawyer, and let the lawyer deal with him. don't put your child through a life of pain caused by a worthless, potentially dangerous father. so, if you don't do it for yourself, you have to do it for your child.
2007-01-22 17:34:57 · answer #4 · answered by P 2 · 3⤊ 2⤋
I'll have to agree with Yak...you sound like soulmates..for life...
things will get better honey...
& you have a child together...think of his future...
keep your family together..family is everything....
good luck honey..hold your head high...
2007-01-23 02:37:41 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Look up "malignant self love" on google - and get the hell out.
2007-01-22 17:52:33 · answer #6 · answered by freshbliss 6 · 1⤊ 1⤋
you have to leave without telling him,because your life is in jeopardy,call help line,they will help you than you can go to government assistant,good luck,put your mind to it and you will be OK,
2007-01-22 18:50:30 · answer #7 · answered by kitty 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Oh gosh, I really feel sorry for your husband. Sounds like all you ever do is complain. Your point of view seems to be completely one sided and selfish. I would recommend a divorce to save your poor husband from you but since you have a kid, now he is anchored to you, poor guy.
No wonder he tried to strangle you.
2007-01-22 17:43:04 · answer #8 · answered by Karasu 1 · 2⤊ 6⤋
I think so.If you go to your local womens abuse center where you live they will help you leave.
2007-01-22 17:28:53 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 2⤋