Why won't my ex help with our children?

Question

I wanted my ex to come and stay with our girls while I went on a trip.I would only be gone for 2 nights. I asked him to stay at my house with them because they have to go to school and it is much easier for them to be at home. Besides they don't like his house or his g/f so they haven't stayed the night with him since our divorce. They are with me 24/7. On his weekends he only takes them for a few hours. And he agreed until I told him that I was going to spend some time with a friend. After that, he was like NO WAY! He won't stay 2 days with our children so I can go with my friend for some time alone? Anyone have any suggestions on why he won't?

Answer 1

He may believe that if he doesn't do this favour for you then he will still be somehow controlling your life, by not allowing you to spend these nights with your friend. He may also have some jealousy issues and/or resentment that your finding a life on your own. But if he refuses do not allow this to upset you too much and hopefully you can find someone else to care for your children. Perhaps you can find one of the kids friends parents that would allow them to stay there and that way they would still get to school also. Best of luck in this situation and I hope that your able to get away for a couple for a couple of nights like you have planned.

Answer 2

Ughhh! Sounds like my ex husband, he can not manage to except the fact that he can no longer control my life. So he does it the only way he can...which sounds like what your ex is doing. My ex will agree to take the kids when I have plans and then he won't show up. He lives out of state, barely ever tries to get the kids, and only calls every 3-4 months. I don't ask my ex for anything anymore. I don't want him to feel like he has even that little bit of control over my life. I think that I have come to except the fact that I can not make him take an active interest or be a decent guy. Good Luck with yours.

Answer 3

I don't know the reason for your divorce, but he seems to want to cause you some problems when you want to go out and do something. I have always said, that no matter the reason for the divorce, both parties (and I am not saying your not) have to do the best for the children and, he needs to play a very important part in their upbringing and take advantage of spending as much time as he can with them. I always hate it when fathers (and sometimes mothers, but not as much) don't want to share anything with the children and take advantage of time with them. He might or might not be happy and it seems he wants you to not be able to enjoy yourself. He has issues and I do agree, you do need time for yourself. You mentioned he has a g/f, so "he" moved on, and you also need the opportunity to do the same and he needs to take responsiblility of the children equally.

Answer 4

He won't because he's a sad little man with a sad little life. He can't be happy unless he knows he has made you miserable. Just find a baby sitter and go. Just remember what goes around comes around. It may not be this week or this year but he will need you someday and you should be agreeable right up to that moment and then tell him to fu## off.

Answer 5

you know that sad he don't even care for his own kids... He knew that his own blood kids.

If you and I are like that right now andyou asked me to come stay 2 nights and make sure daughter go to school all that. I would go for it and it take 2 people to take care 2 kids and Not one person to do 24/7 all the time...he only took them out few hrs???? you need to make sure he need to pay for child support because you doing mother and father job.... you know what I mean??? and I have 2 kids 3 year old and 2 year old and i have 3rd due in march 2007 and my wife and I work hard with our kids and spend time with time and all that. I know what it like not have a father in my life and I making sure my kids don't go though with it.

For what your ex husband doing was disgraceful to his own blood kids/????????????????????

Answer 6

he's obviously very selfish and is in his own world right now..im assuming that he hasn't always acted like this considering your post? although it seems to you to be completely un-fair, try to think of it the other way around..its really his loss. he isn't spending time with his girls..he is losing valuable time with them, because of his selfish ways. you need to take care of yourself and your children and if he doesn't want to be apart of their lives, he will have to suffer the consequences, eventually he may feel guilty and then it will be the girls' decision on whether or not they want him in their lives. all you can do is take care of you..i know it won't be easy, but in the end you have your children and they know what a great job your doing! good luck!

Answer 7

Oh my.....you're interior the right same boat that i'm in with my ex. He and that i are nevertheless legally married, yet have been separated for a 365 days now. I even have one toddler with him, and he has Autism too, so i understand precisely what you're dealing with. My ex hasn't bothered to work out my son using fact the day after Christmas. He replaced into doing nicely for the 1st quite a few months after he moved out......he replaced into calling me to pass to him, and we would make arrangements for the visits, issues like that. Then hastily he stopped coming around. He did no longer pass away, he continues to be interior the area and ought to come see my son if he wished to. He chooses to no longer, in basic terms like your ex. i understand precisely how indignant you're, using fact i'm an identical way. you could no longer relatively do something to do away with the anger, you in basic terms could cope with it and take issues daily. My son does not even nicely known that his dad even left. If he'd come back top now, he does no longer even are conscious of it relatively is his father. i assume you could say i'm at the instant being blessed, using fact i'm in a courting with a marvelous guy and he's greater advantageous than prepared to take over being the "father determine" to my son. he's very wanting to undertake my son and each little thing. the form of guy or woman your ex is.........he's egocentric. they only think of of themselves, and what's superb for them.....what reward them. What they don't understand is they are hurting harmless little lives that they helped create, and to me that makes them look heartless and chilly. the only factor you're able to do on your little ones is to tell them the certainty approximately their father, yet on their point, and be as form as obtainable. the final factor you could cope with is resentment in direction of him from them....that's no longer the ultimate thank you to pass. He has relatively some growing to be as much as do, in basic terms like my ex....and at some point they'll understand what they have lost, and could kick themselves interior the behinds using fact they are going to in no way be waiting to get that back back.

Answer 8

Be for real, he's not too happy about your having a "friend" even though he has a g/f. So, there's no way he will ever watch the girls knowing this would be the reason.

Answer 9

why you ask your ex if you can get some of your family to look after your kids, beside you need some time off and explore bit on what you missing.

Answer 10

The green-eyed monster has reared its ugly head. It's okay for him to be with another woman but apparently it isn't for you. For whatever reason, he is preventing you from having a relationship with somebody else.