Ive been with my boyfriend for 8 and a half yrs. We have a 18 month old son. For the first few years of our relationship we got on really really well. He has always had a very bad temper but I hoped it would go away the more he loved me - it hasnt. He says he loves me so much and he says that I can wind him up so much easier than other people because of how much he loves me?! - and thats why he loses his temper like he does?!?!?
We have a lot of money problems lately, and owe thousands of pounds betwean us and cant make the payments - and the arguments seem to be getting worse and worse.....he screams and swears and I sometimes feel like he likes to bully me, I think it makes him feel good if he can make me cry?!
I really really love him but does he love me?? We do get on really well most of he time, we have the same interest and like spending time together, but I wonder if he still loves me the way he used to? Or does he just love me and stay with me because we have a son
2007-01-22 07:59:39 · 9 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
See if couples' counseling helps.
Also, he needs to take care of HIS anger problem. His problem w/anger can only be solved by him. Whether he loves you has less to do w his problem, than a lot of issues that were there before you ever came into the picture. He has learned to use anger to deal with stress. And he'll have to unlearn it.
Actions speak louder than feelings (love) or words. Even if he only throws fits occasionally, they can still be damaging to the relationship, and the child. That's why I say he needs work on his anger, and both of you on communication through a counselor.
2007-01-22 08:06:59 · answer #1 · answered by acrobatic 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If his temper was always bad, hoping to change him, as time goes on is bad thinking on your part. Changing behavior problems take many, many month, years or a lifetime in counseling. He's controlling you by saying that "You can wind him up easier than most people." My advice to you is run as fast as you can an never look back This man will only become more dangerous and problems will escalate as time goes on. Take your son and find a less chaotic life and a man that will not control and bully you. Peace and love
2007-01-22 08:15:54 · answer #2 · answered by Bonduesa 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well the same thing is going on in my marriage, and his the same way as your boyfriend and I've been with him for only two years and have a two month baby. he really do sent ***** about the money but his dose make me cry ALOT, sometimes i think he doesn't love me anymore but sometimes he dose show me love is that the way your boyfriend is? and about his temper hell never change if he didn't change when your baby was born then he wont at ALL trust me, you shouldn't put up with his crap! if he dose love you like he says he dose he wouldn't get mad at you for ever little thing, tell him he really needs to change or girl leave him even though you love him so much, you could find some guy who can respect you more. i know it's hard i can't leave me husband either.
2007-01-22 08:42:28 · answer #3 · answered by shygirl 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Financial problems sometimes can break a relationship. It sounds as if the only time you have arguments is about finances Then I would think he loves you but is just stressed by the financial situation right now. See what you two can do to work on this together. Good luck to both of you
2007-01-22 08:13:07 · answer #4 · answered by Janst 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like he needs anger management. If he really loves you he wouldn't yell at you and make you cry on purpose. Talk to him and tell him how you feel. If your relationship does not improve then consider leaving him. Maybe if you separate he will realize what he had and try harder.
2007-01-22 08:08:07 · answer #5 · answered by chemky1 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He probably does still love you. Unfortunately it sounds like his definition of a loving relationship is different from yours. You need to decide if you can live with this, keeping in mind what's best for your son.
2007-01-22 08:06:25 · answer #6 · answered by tmac 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I really cannot answer that question because you the one live with him. Ask yourself do you want to be treated like a dog or Queen you are. I think you deserve better.
2007-01-22 08:11:37 · answer #7 · answered by angle2005star 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He probably does still love u u just a a diffrent perspective on what love really is.
2007-01-22 08:08:14 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
TELL HIM TO GET SOME COUNCELING
IF NOT I WOULD LEAVE HIM
2007-01-22 09:19:27 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋