How do I apologize to my husband. I assumed that he was cheating and was wrong. It was proven to me that he was just talking to a friend of his that was counseling him on his fears of becoming a father. The perfume that I smelled was from the guys girlfriend. She happened to spray it with him in the room and some got on him.
I have told him that I was wrong and that I am sorry but he just says I should know him better than that. Was I wrong to assume the worst? I tried telling him that it was just that my hormones were making me emotional and had me suspecting something that wasn't really going on but he says. I shouldn't have jumped so quickly to suspect something was going on when it wasn't.
I do accept that this is the real story. Basically cause it was proven by the other couple involved.
I just want to make this up to my husband. Does anyone out there have any ideas on anything I can try. Nothing I have done so far seems to be working. I don't want this to ruin my marriage.
2007-01-22 05:50:27 · 20 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Just be patient and give it some time. I bet he knows deep down how sorry you really are. He just has to get over being hurt by your accusation.
2007-01-22 06:08:20 · answer #1 · answered by Babie Sue 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wow, has he got a great hold on you now!
Basically, I would say that your husband is carrying this much too far. It is also a well known documented fact that a woman's hormones are skewed and unpredictable for the whole of her pregnancy, making her mood swings violent and uncontrollable.
You apologized. Let that be the end of it. If he wants to make a big deal of it, that is his problem.
He should not be requiring you to humble yourself any more. Doing so is just repeating the same mistake you made. You are not his slave. You are his equal in the marriage. If he deserved to be judged with more reason, then so do you.
2007-01-22 05:56:41 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, guys DO cheat. A LOT. So, don't eat TOO much "crow pie." You have said you are sorry. Sounds like you've said it A LOT. Sometimes it takes a bit of time to forgive others. So, give it a bit of time. And give him a bit of space to forgive you. And hey - you're human. The perfume stuff would have made me suspicious, too. Have you tried telling your husband that you really want to make this mistake that you made up to him? (And also to give you a break for being human and having insecurities like so many of us women/people/ do?)
If you cannot get through to him after another week or so, I would suggest getting yourselves to marriage counseling pronto. It has been statistically proven to work. (the counseling).
2007-01-22 06:04:38 · answer #3 · answered by Alice laughing 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
"She happened to spray it with him in the room and some got on him." yeah right! First off, if the smell of perfume was the only thing that got you suspicious, then I can't blame him for being mad, but I suspect there is more to this story you are not telling us. Ever thing the other couple could be in on it? Maybe he's a third. Apologize to him, but keep your eyes open, I doubt this story is over.
2007-01-22 06:04:53 · answer #4 · answered by javelin 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Unfortunately, you're going to have to pay the price by being patient. You questioned his loyalty and you're not going to be able to get that trust back easily. Just try to be consistently loving. Reiterate again how sorry you are. Be sure to tell him how unfair it was of you to think those thoughts. I would also put the shoe on the other foot by saying something to the effect of, "If you had accused me of such a thing, I would be very hurt and you have every reason to feel like this" that way he knows you're empathizing with him. Good luck. It will work out and he'll get over it.
2007-01-22 06:01:09 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, for one, you can stop worring about this. Has he forgiven you? If he has, then let it go. If he hasn't, asked him why.
Please don't chaulk this upto hormones. You pretty much insulted him by saying you don't trust him anymore, and that you think he would stoop so low as to cheat on you. Sonds pretty bad doesn't it. You have told him waht you are sorry for, but its going to take some time. Just do what you normally do and don't bring this subject anymore. Tyr to do things around the house to please him. Like, make sure there is a meal ready when he gets home, a clean hous, ahppy children. And most of all, sex. Don't push anything.
2007-01-22 06:03:22 · answer #6 · answered by Pandora 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Boy I bet your face is red. All I can suggest is that you make him a romantic dinner and try to put the past behind you. In time he will begin to see that you are really sorry for jumping the gun. Just give him time. Be patient with him. You should have gotten the real story before you assumed anything.
2007-01-22 05:56:13 · answer #7 · answered by RoiLynn T 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have apologized. That's your part. You'll need to wait for your husband to accept the apology. If it can be done without causing an issue, you might apologize to his friends, too.
Women do have a lot more hormones surging through their body during pregnancy. You are right about that affecting you. I experienced it as well.
2007-01-22 05:55:10 · answer #8 · answered by Faith 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Apologize to him and love him and show him that you now trust him... Be a better wife to him and start to trust and love him. Yes you were wrong to assume the worst but we all make mistakes and none of us are perfect.... You are only human and sometimes as humans we jump and act before thinking things through.
2007-01-22 06:01:38 · answer #9 · answered by Lady Hewitt 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Baby girl I am a wife myself, and I have made mistakes too. You don't worry yourself to death you have got a little one to think about. He may be mad but he will get over it. every man has their own way in which they handle their anger.he may choose to ignore you for a while. you use that time to chill with girlfriends, take a shower,clean the house,shop,read a book, get some rest,etc. He obviously is concerned about the family you guys are creating because he was talking about his nervousness. he wants to be the best father. you take time to pray or if you are not religous just to focus on the great times you shared. and some of the great compliments he has given you. he will come around. just work on you. you felt you had a good reason to bring up the issue.so don't beat yourself up. but work on your sense of security after he forgives you. don't let him think you are insecure.let it go breathe. he does love you. be blessed.
2007-01-22 06:05:21 · answer #10 · answered by rasheda c 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Marriage is built on trust, so you should have trusted him, but now he needs to forgive you now because you are sorry for jumping to conclusions. Can you make him a special meal? You need to talk with him. I hope that you will be back to normal when the baby is born. That may change everything.
2007-01-22 05:58:44 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋