my husband passed away 13 months ago, and i still cry and miss him just as much as i did the first day...we were together for 22 years and i dont know how to let go and start living again?
2007-01-22 05:31:34 · 10 answers · asked by pepsi 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
You don't. Especially after you spent 22 years together. Get out and meet friends sounds like great advice for a teen or young adult and gets them 2 points but it is impractical. This soulmate of yours is gone and that hurts. I would suggest making yourself go to a grief support group. I went to one and found it was helpful to be able to talk about my loved one with people who really understood. Talking helps. It is good to be with people who really understood. One lady confessed that the garage door would not open and for a slight second she thought about how her husband would come home to fix it. Her neighbors couldn't understand that she was crying hysterically over a garage door. During the funeral and first few months people are generally supportive but they go back to their lives while you are trying to figure out how to make this seemingly unbearable pain (grief I think is the worst emotional pain you can experience) stop. The thing is that once you live through it and the first day that you can say " I made it" you feel stronger and there is not much in life that can rattle you. Deal with the grief first. take as long as you need you are on nobody's time table. Try devotional reading. Take one day at a time. Honey you are living. You are living one of the hardest lessons that you will ever live. You are also discovering what life will look like without the physical presence of your other half. He is still in there in your heart.
2007-01-26 03:21:34 · answer #1 · answered by newyorktilson 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Of course you miss him. You'll always love him.
Finding a new way to be happy and to try and live the rest of your life without grief is not a betrayal. Spending so much of your life in sadness is not a tribute to him. He doesn't want you to spend the rest of your life in grief. He knows how much he meant to you. He doesn't want to be the reason for your misery. He wants you to remember him with happiness.
Put him away in your heart and keep him there as a happy memory. Decide that you are going to be as strong as possible until you meet him again. Then, go outside. Find something you like to do. Start having fun in new and different ways. You might be really good at something that you've never tried before. It's okay to have fun and to smile and make friends.
He'll always be there in your heart. It's okay for you to be happy again.
2007-01-22 14:09:01 · answer #2 · answered by loves2fly84095 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm so sorry for your loss. What you're feeling is completely normal. You spend almost a lifetime with him and it's understandable that you are still grieving. I do advise you to see a grief counselor. Maybe even look for support groups. It might be a good idea to also get out of the house and meet new people and make friends. I'm sure your husband wouldn't want you depressed and feeling lonely.
Take it one day at a time. But definitely see a grief counselor. My deepest condolences. I pray for strength, comfort and peace in this difficult time. Hang in there. God bless.
2007-01-22 13:40:04 · answer #3 · answered by jazz_lover_25 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hi
First of all I want to tell you how sad I am for your loss.
It's only been basically one year.
This is a traumatic event in your life and you might need to see a therapist to help you. Don't think abou the stigma of professional help, only think about getting better.
it really hasnt been that long so keep in mind that this kind of pain might take alot longer for you to get over. also talking about your feelings to friends or family might help, as well as maybe going to church and praying. I hope you find the peace that your heart is seeking.
2007-01-22 13:37:15 · answer #4 · answered by jim 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This will take time and healing... This will not be an easy process to even begin to start doing so... With time things will and should get easier for you..... You may need to go to counseling for this. I wish you the best and hope you can start getting past the pain of this soon. Hugs to you today.
2007-01-22 13:55:18 · answer #5 · answered by Lady Hewitt 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I know what it feels like to lose someone very close to you, and i am very sorry that you lost him.just remember, what would your husband want you to do? this always helps me.Always remember this is not good-bye between you and your husband, but a simple see you later.
2007-01-22 14:03:28 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Get out and make new friends or try to meet a new guy I know no one can replace him but don't get depressed...
2007-01-22 13:35:00 · answer #7 · answered by XOXOXO 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you cannot cry for him for the rest of your life.It is all in a humans life .understand the reality and start living again.find someone who care for you.loves you,shares your happiness and sorrow for the rest your life.Life is very short spent crying.write to me to:suneethprasanna@yahoo.co.in if you need my advise.
2007-01-22 13:45:04 · answer #8 · answered by suneethprasanna 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
try going to a therapist, they can help you go through the process!
2007-01-22 14:07:06 · answer #9 · answered by Fiesty 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
JUST BE STRONG
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2007-01-22 13:42:02 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋