I only know i have change we fight a lot I dont know how stop I love her to death i would do anything for her . we are apart right now, we have a 10 month yrs old daughter. when i call her we usually end up fighting because i dont agree on how she handles stuff since ive been gone..it seem like she can take any i say to her because she turns it around like im attacking her ..I need to know how to stop fighting with her i dont want to divorce her i love to much to trow away the time we spent together . i know she my only one for me in this world but i cant make her see that . i want to keep her .how? do i survive with her while im gone ?.....any marrie people please help me!
2007-01-22 02:40:09 · 24 answers · asked by DAMIEN 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Quit being so controlling, and critical. Stop fighting to be right! Tell your wife how much you love her and respect her opinions. Tell her you are sorry, and you want to have a happy family. It takes two to fight. One of you has to be the peace maker here. Try holding your tongue in stead of saying the first thing that comes to mind. You are two separate people with two separate thoughts on life and how to live it. You have to accept and appreciate your differences and come to some compromise on the very important issues. This is not a war to be won, it is a union of two people who love each other and have a respect for each .others uniqueness
2007-01-22 02:51:47 · answer #1 · answered by sweetpea 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Where are you gone to?
If you have a 10 month old daughter, it is worth getting some counseling to try to overcome your habit of fighting.
Don't give your wife reasons to not trust you, be honest and take time to build her trust by your actions.
Spend as much time with your daughter as you can, and maybe set some goals as a family of things you would like to do together, how you see your life in 10 years. Thinking longterm might help your wife to see you as being not-gone.
2007-01-22 02:44:34 · answer #2 · answered by Sweet n Sour 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
It will seem like alot of work on your part dear, but you will have to be doing most or it will seem like most of the work to keep your marriage going.
Your going to have to reasure her constantly that you love her as deeply as you do.
Maybe you'll have to try having a bit more of an open mind about how she handles stuff. Instead of fighting about how she's doing things, try switching the opinions to being in a more positive manner. I know we don't and can't always agree with others, but just try it. Give her credit for what she's trying to do.
You may be attacking her and not realizing it. Pay attention to the words you use and the way you use them.
2007-01-22 02:55:58 · answer #3 · answered by peggin_beast 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am not saying that people who are apart from one another should fight naturally, but what is the reason you are gone? I have been married for a while, and we were together for years before that. Your wife probably gets mad at you for complaining about the way she is handling things, because it is much easier for someone to complain about it than to actually do it. From what you have said, it seems like she is the one holding down the fort while you are away. I live with my husbad every day, and if he complains about the way I do something, I smile pleasantly, and I gladly hand the responsibility off to him. If your family is alive and well, what else do you have to fight about?
2007-01-22 02:51:29 · answer #4 · answered by looking_for_all_the_answers 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Quit being so critical about how she handles things. If you are that overbearing then that is probably why she wants to get away from you. Mellow out, and let her take control of some situations.
Keep your mouth shut, and let the only things that come out of your mouth be nice things. If you are a spaz and a control freak you will not have any woman for too long.
2007-01-22 02:46:41 · answer #5 · answered by Lovebug123 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
She doesn't want to be with you, whether you love her or not, that is what she is telling you.
whether you agree on how she handles the child doesn't matter at this point, unless the child is being harmed. She has custody and is looking after her 24-7, so she is doing what she thinks is right.
You can't make someone love you and if you are constantly arguing, then it isn't going to work.
You must face this and get on with your life,
Be a good father to your child and move on...
2007-01-22 02:54:21 · answer #6 · answered by doclakewrite 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
something must of happen for your wife to not trust you and you're still not being honest about whatever you did. you should never approach her by saying you don't agree with what she is doing, you left the home. go to speak with a professional and if you don't, then you both don't have open enough hearts to make things work. life gets hard like that sometimes, but you learn from it and grow stronger or grow apart. you should of never left the home though, you should of stayed and left to go to professional instead. Best of luck!!!
2007-01-22 02:58:03 · answer #7 · answered by dthsmx5 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need marriage counseling and help here. You need to prove to her and be a better husband to her. Change who you are and do not try to change her. I think that if you work on changing and become a better husband to and for her you will see her change and she will want to be with you and make this marriage work... This will take patience and time though and you loving her where she is at. I wish you the best.
2007-01-22 02:47:42 · answer #8 · answered by Lady Hewitt 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
she is not going to trust anything u tell her to do, doesn't think u are smart enough to tell her what to do, as she feels listening to u has gotten her no where. she hasn't forgiven a wrong she feels u did her. so the respect is gone, so she doesn't respect u enough to even accept any criticism from u at all. she does feel attacked when u are critical, as long as this is going on she will continue to distrust, and want to do things her way.
2007-01-22 02:57:00 · answer #9 · answered by jude 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The biggest lesson everyone needs to learn is to pick your fights, there are very few things in this world worth arguing about. For instance.....you arent there, then complain about how she handles things?.....If you would like them handled differently then you need to handle them yourself.......no wonder she feels under attack
2007-01-22 02:51:03 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋