as if i felt nothing for him
now its been 5 years and ive just started to deal with the guilt of that.
is that a normal reaction?
2007-01-21 20:59:25 · 9 answers · asked by darina 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Did you ever think that maybe he was hurting as bad as you? It's situations like this that are suppose to pull you together not apart. If you are the type that locks yourself away and pushes away the one that loves you then you need to work on that first. I can guarantee this much if he wanted the baby it broke his heart when you lost it only to be broken again when you locked him out.I have been there to' So work on your self first so if something bad happens like this again you will be able to handle it together and not let it break you apart.
2007-01-21 21:28:40 · answer #1 · answered by Sarcastic Sid 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am not disfellowshipped, (I "faded" purposely to avoid this silly little title, and there a couple elders who would LOVE to get me, but since I am doing nothing they can use as an excuse.....ha!) but I know quite a few people who are. The really sad thing is, I have noticed two very distinct groups among the disfellowshipped people I know. The first group has researched things for themselves and knows quite a bit more about the bible and the history of jw's than they did while in the organization, and they are not about to let some crusty old businessmen in brooklyn tell them whether or not any god approves of them. The second group is people who have done no research; still cling to the rhetoric their parents repeated for their entire childhood, and are the quickest to jump to the defense of jw's. I feel really bad for this second group, because they defend people who were willing to throw them away so easily. Like so many other victims of psychological abuse, they have bought into the lies of their abuser, and don't know how to stand up for themselves. As with other issues, knowledge and information is the answer.
2016-05-24 14:26:09 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
guilt always has a way of sneaking up on you at a later time. i would say this is a normal reaction because at the time you couldn't feel anything but your own pain and now that it doesn't hurt so much anymore you are thinking about other things that were going on at the time including how you treated the father. just talk to him about it and tell him why you reacted that way and if you feel like it try to apologize. you never know how he was feeling about the miscarriage and was pushed away by the one person who he thought would be there.
2007-01-21 21:07:45 · answer #3 · answered by chrisarea_99 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think it is. The only thing is different from other people dealing with it is they deal differently then others. If you don't learn how to process hurt then you will do that you are accustom to. I didn't know how to deal with lost either and the first instinct is to push away the person close to you. This is something you are gonna have to make peace with along with God. You could try to call your boyfriend and talk it over with him. Let him know how sorry you are and let him know how you went Thur the lost of you all child. Sometimes guys get over things sooner than we do.They'll move on and look at us as if we should be over it. It's really hard getting over the lost of a child, but if you try to talk to him and really apologize and explain then maybe you can move on.
2007-01-21 22:41:46 · answer #4 · answered by Go GO Ressa 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Losing a baby is a very emotional thing. Waiting 5 years is a long time to realize that you may have hurt him though. If you are not with him you should try and talk to him just to have some closure on things. If you are still together just try and talk about it and let him know that you feel really bad about it.
2007-01-21 21:20:33 · answer #5 · answered by ? 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Old saying: Sin in haste, repent at leisure. Part of the old issue with hormones. Maybe, just maybe you can rebuild a relationship if you are both forgiving types, otherwise just realize that you are both human beings and go on. Whatever else, realize that what has been done is in the past and go forward to whatever path you desire. Feel it, examine it, and put it behind you.
2007-01-21 21:07:25 · answer #6 · answered by PartyTime 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, it's been heard of. I was raped, ended up pregnant, had a miscarriage and am a lesbian. I ended up taking it out my partner. I also have heard of other heterosexual women who will get distant and take things out on their partners.
2007-01-23 05:40:17 · answer #7 · answered by Scully 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Its normal, but a vry late realization. If he is still waiting for you, then go ahead. This time be patient.
2007-01-21 21:08:15 · answer #8 · answered by Advengal 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Learn to live and forget the past.
2007-01-21 22:17:57 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋