i took the chance to tell my friend that her boyfriend (who was also a good friend of mine, but not anymore since he cheated) was cheating on her. I explained to her the whole story and she got worried and called him. Then he told her that he didnt cheat on her but that he knew that i would tell her and that he just played along to fool me (how stupid does he think i am) but i KNOW he's lying because i know the girl he cheated on with very very well. so now my cousin doesnt believe me, and she says that if he did cheat on her, she deserves it because she cheated on him but had the deceny to tell him.im scared that he's cheating on her with other girls (they live quite far away) that we dont even know about. i just dont want her to get hurt, how can i convince her that he doesnt deserve her? she says that she'll stay with him even if he did cheat on her because she loves him.
2007-01-21 18:35:55 · 23 answers · asked by cella<3 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
sorry to say but your friend is behaving like a dumb person. Who would want to stay with someone who cheats? You have done your best in warning her, listening is her choice now!
2007-01-21 18:44:01 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
I was once your cousin. My husband was cheating on me and a very good friend of mine told me that he was. When he was confronted, he denied it and told me that she was lying and trying to cause problems because she wanted him too. I (don't ask me now why) believed him, and cut off all communication with her because he wanted me too. I loved him and felt that staying together was the best thing for my family. About a year went by before I heard anything else about it, and this time I heard it from a neighbor of ours who just simply said to me, "if you want your daughter to deal with just like you are, then stay, but if not you need to get out. She is only going to behave how she sees her mother deal with things." Then it was like the lightbulb finally came on. I asked him about it again, and again he denied it. The woman he was cheating on me with also denied it. So I belived him (AGAIN), but this time I was paying attention to his cell bills, where he was going, checking the milliage on his car, and a couple times following him. After a month, I had the proof and I went home and packed his stuff and delivered it to his girlfriend's house.
If your cousin is anything like I was she is too embarassed to think that her bf might be cheating on her. She probably wants to find out for herself and then call on you for support. What I suggest is that you drop it all together, but still be a friend to her. When he is at her house, don't be. And if you do hang out, make sure there is enough people around that you don't have to talk to him. Sooner or later the truth will come out, so just be patient.
Or maybe your cousin and her boyfriend have what is called an open realitionship. I don't know much about it, but maybe someone on here can tell more.
2007-01-21 19:04:00 · answer #2 · answered by Someonesmommy 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
By telling her, you did your part as her friend and if she forgives him b/c she did the same thing, she's really being right about it. Not to say she 'deserves' it but it's honestly not right to judge him for what she did herself. And it sounds like she really does love him since she's being real. If you want to keep her as your friend, don't push the issue anymore. Instead, be there for her.
If he truely doesn't deserve her, she will find that out on her own. Pushing her about this will only end in forcing her to chose between him and you b/c as her friend, she assumes you're going to be there for her instead of against her. And being overbearing appears to be against her.
Let it work itself out...you did what a true friend should do now let her do the rest.
2007-01-21 22:57:42 · answer #3 · answered by paigenstuff 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well how to believe on you, will be give her a picture or something like that, that it is showing him that he is cheating, but you know what i think that you did a lot, and then if she thinks that her bf love her, then live her alone, one time that she get hurt, she will look for you, and unfortunately that is the only way that you got, you know sometimes people learn staff by the way that hurt
2007-01-21 18:45:13 · answer #4 · answered by Moi 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well, there is nothing more you can do about the situation. Your part is complete you cared enough to tell her and how she handles the situation is her choice. She made it clear that if she is cheating on him that she will stay the more you try to convince her the better the chance that you will ruin your relationship with her. She is going to have to learn on her own. You should just be there if her relationship goes downhill and if he really is cheating on her it will.
2007-01-21 18:42:37 · answer #5 · answered by pRetTiI lAdiE 1 · 2⤊ 0⤋
You need to get a life of your own and mind your own business. If you don't, you will lose the friends that you do have---now your intentions on one side of the coin are honorable, but on the other it is time wasted and none of your business. Get a job or a hobby if you have time to pry and watch and talk about other people--regardless of circumstances. You seem to think that you are helping--you aren't so go on about your day and worry about your own life--seriously!!!
2007-01-21 18:58:43 · answer #6 · answered by fire_inur_eyes 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
trust me, you did enough. If she doesn't believe you, then don't pursue it, it's sad that she wouldn't though, being that you're her cousin, but there's only so much you can do. Sometimes people need to learn lessons the hard way. The best thing you can do is be there to support her when she does realize this idiot is no good.
2007-01-21 18:41:26 · answer #7 · answered by california girl 4 · 3⤊ 0⤋
You have done all that you can do. Later on she'll appologize to you for not believing you in the first place. As for her boyfriend, he'll get what's coming to him. From now on, just stay out of it.
2007-01-21 18:43:59 · answer #8 · answered by Tasha 4 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Yeah it relatively is a poor factor that had got here approximately to you :/ individually even while the two one in each and every of you promised to be elementary and dependable, theres nevertheless going to be slightly of dought while it incorporate the subject remember of cheating. i might say attempt to confront his chum who advised him approximately this "incident" and notice why he might say this form of factor. that's frequently stable to get the info quickly that way. i wish this facilitates and ur difficulty gets settled :)
2016-10-31 23:30:58 · answer #9 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If she is stupid enough to stay with him even if he cheats on her sorry to say,but she does deserve it.Nothing you can do.Time to just mind your own business you told her she don't belive you or don't care .There is nothing you can do to make her care.
2007-01-21 18:42:45 · answer #10 · answered by amber 4 · 3⤊ 0⤋