How can I stop being so sensitive and let others control my sense of self-worth?

Question

It should read and stop letting others control my sense of self-worth? I depended on others for my self-esteem how do I establish my own sense of self?

Its not so bad but I do indeed want to be mentally stronger and tougher without turning into a B****

For some people it is "in one ear out the other" when they here things that are hurtful...For me it stays and then I analyze and analyze and try to justify and ....does this have to do with the fact that I was raised with a sheltered overprotective, overloving family?

I'm utilizing positive self talk but am losing patience sometimes....sometimes there is such built resistance when I think but What about what so and so said about me....

Answer 1

EVERYONE IS SENSITIVE TO OTHER PEOPLES OPINIONS. IN ORDER TO NOT LET IT CONTROL YOUR SENSE OF SELF-WORTH YOU NEED TO REALIZE THAT YOU ARE A GREAT PERSON, ON YOUR OWN WITHOUT ANYONE ELSE'S OPINION! AND IT IS OK FOR YOU TO KNOW THAT YOU ARE A GREAT PERSON, AND IT IS OK FOR YOU TO HAVE CONFIDENCE IN YOURSELF AND A VERY HIGH SENSE OF SELF-WORTH! AND THAT DOES NOT MAKE YOU A B****! YOU JUST NEED TO TAKE SOME TIME AND EVALUATE HOW YOU FEEL ABOUT YOURSELF! AND IF YOU FEEL GOOD ABOUT YOURSELF START HAVING MORE FAITH IN YOURSELF, AND DON'T WORRY WHAT OTHER PEOPLE THINK! IF YOU LIKE YOURSELF, OTHER PEOPLE WILL LIKE YOU! IF YOU BELIEVE IN YOURSELF, OTHERS WILL BELIEVE IN YOU! YOU JUST NEED TO REALIZE THAT YOU ARE WORTH IT! AND IF YOU FIND SOMETHING ABOUT YOURSELF THAT YOU DON'T LIKE, YOU CAN ALWAYS CHANGE IT UNTIL YOU DO LIKE THAT ABOUT YOURSELF! AND THAT WILL GIVE YOU THE SENSE OF SELF-WORTH YOU DESERVE, AND THE SELF-ESTEEM YOU DESIRE AS WELL! JUST KNOW THAT WE ARE ONLY HUMAN, AND NO ONE IS PERFECT!

Answer 2

As far as being sensitive, you will probably always be sensitive. That is just the way some people are, not so much a choice.
As far as not letting others control your self worth, that's kind of a difficult question to answer. It's easy for me to say, just don't do it. That isn't an answer though. Try talking to yourself like you would if you were talking to a friend or someone you really care about. We (especially women) are so hard on ourselves. People are usually much harder on ourselves than we ever are with anyone else. When you catch yourself talking down to yourself, just tell yourself to stop. Actually say the word stop. Then think about what you would say to a friend if she were in the same situation. Apply that dialoge to yourself. Keep practicing this. Once you do this long enough, you will realize that you are a good person, that you deserve good things, and that you don't need anyone elses approval or opinion to make yourself feel good.
I do hope that this helps. Good Luck!

Answer 3

It's so easy, you won't believe me.

Make a decision, and change what you give your attention to.

Right now, you're focused on yourself, and bent on pleasing others so they'll give you positive affirmation so you can convince yourself you are lovable. (You may not have even been aware of it, but at some point you made a decision to make this the focus of your attention.)

Well, you have the same power available to you today: Make a conscious decision to redirect your focus - off yourself and onto others. The quickest and easiest way to do this is to build up empathy....you can do this through volunteer work at your local hospital or nursing home. An hour or two a week can give you a vastly different perspective. You learn to sympathize with and focus on the needs and hurts of others, while also learning to build and appreciate facets of your own character that you didn't even know were there.

When you're with your friends or in any social setting, listen very carefully to what others are saying about themselves - their wants, needs, hopes, fears, problems. Make a point to remember what you can about them. Help where you can, even if it's only being a patient ear or shoulder to cry on sometimes. Or someone to laugh with.

The more you learn to direct your attention to others, the easier it will be to forget about yourself and their perceived opinions of you.

Answer 4

You have to be your own person and not care what others think. Do what you like. You have to look at yourself and think about this, if you were another person and met yourself, would you like you? because if not it's time for some changes. You also sound like you need something that belongs exclusively to you. Find a job or a hobby to call you own. Eventually you won't feel like everyone else always has the good ideas before you do.

Answer 5

Tell yourself that you are worth more then what others think!

You want the best out of life right? Well take action, be assertive and go and get it!

No one is going to do it for you so better you do it for yourself NOW!

You sounds like a young person, if you are self worth gets stronger with more life experiences.

Stick and stone thing.....don' t let people get to you...who knows you better then yourself..what do they know?

Answer 6

It's easy as 1-2-3

First you need to take a good look in the mirror and get a REALISTIC idea of who you are and what is your worth

Second, you set REALISTIC short term and long term goals to achieve things that you feel are missing in your life.

Third, you stop caring what others think. It just doesn't matter.

Send me email if you need more details how to go about each of these three easy steps.

Answer 7

Read book the four agreements by Miguel I forget his last name. It will give you all details how you became that way and how to change very simply. Also read Bhagavad Gita as it is by Bhaktivedanta Prabhupada which gives the meaning of human life. go to harekrishnatemple.c for details

Answer 8

I would talk to a therapist. Also I wouldn't post question's like that on here if you're a sensitive person people can be really mean.