A question for gays and lesbians?

Question

Do you understand the difference between tolerance and acceptance?

For example, I may tolerate your homosexuality, but I will never accept it as normal. Many homosexuals say they want tolerance, but what they really want is to force everyone to accept their behavior as equal to heterosexuality.

This is a serious question that is not intended to be mean. I truly do tolerate homosexuals and have had homosexual friends in the past. I also hate homophobes who are always bashing gays. But that doesn't mean that I love homosexuality or will ever consider it normal human behavior.

Answer 1

Tolerance is to allow something room to coexist alongside everything else. Acceptance is to understand that thing as well as to allow for it. It is desirable that everyone tolerate homosexuality. For me, this requires not that that person understand or embrace it. Just allow me the same rights and privileges you expect to have for yourself. If you cannot do that much, you are not tolerating me.

Answer 2

I definitely see where you're coming from on this. I completely believe its an issue thats based on our societal standards. We preach tolerance of everything under the sun but hold a double standard when it comes to acceptance. There is a difference, you're completely right. It comes down to one simple fact. When you're brought up as a child you are taught what is wrong and what is right. In a vast majority of the households in our country homosexuality would make the "wrong" list. We're taught and we learn to tolerate some things on the wrong list but never is it right to accept them. As a teenager however I have hope for the future. I see the issue of tolerance vs. acceptance as very generational as well. While the older generations were always taught that homosexuality is wrong bordering on evil, my younger generation has been brought up to see homosexuality in a much more positive light (certainly not as "right" but i would argue its not seen as "wrong" any more either.)

Answer 3

I think your question is sincere and well-intentioned. What you don't seem to understand is that homosexuality IS equal to heterosexuality. Gay people are human beings just like you. Are you saying that you tolerate homosexuality as long as they accept some sort of second-class citizenship?

Answer 4

Sure, I understand the difference. And, like one of the first answers, I'm glad that you are honest about it.

So what you have clearly implied is that you are NOT in favor of equal rights, since that means equating homosexual behavior with heterosexual behavior. And you won't accept that equation.

If you get outvoted at the ballotbox -- if a majority of voters and/or their politicians do vote to legalize gay marriage -- then what will you do?

Answer 5

I understand the difference between tolerance and acceptance, but most straight people do not.

When a gay person can be fired from their job for no other reason than being gay, that person is not asking for acceptance or tolerance; all they ask for is to not be discriminated against for who they happen to love.

When a gay person is denied health care coverage for their partner, that person is not asking for acceptance or tolerance; all they ask for is to not be discriminated against for who they happen to love.

When a gay person cannot visit their partner in a hospital since they are not a family member, that person is not asking for acceptance or tolerance; all they ask for is to not be discriminated against for who they happen to love.

When a gay person is taxed at the highest tax rate on their partners share of ownership of a jointly owned home if a partner dies and often has to sell their home to pay the taxes, that person is not asking for acceptance or tolerance; all they ask for is to not be discriminated against for who they happen to love.

There is very little acceptance of gay people and there is very little tolerance. If the issue was tolerance without acceptance same sex marriage would be a reality and not a political discussion since it would be tolerated as it has no effect on straight marriages.

Regarding those who want "to force everyone to accept their behavior as equal", the only people forcing any beliefs are those who say gay people should have no rights, no acceptance, and do not tolerate those 'uppity' gay people who ask for some basic legal protections and human rights.

Acceptance of gay people is rare, tolerance of gay people is rare, but discrimination against gay people can easily be found.

Answer 6

Do you understand the difference between bigotry and hatred?

For example, I may tolerate your bigotry, but I will never accept it as normal. Many heterosexuals say they tolerate gays, but what they really are doing is disguising hatred as tolerance.

addendum:

Regarding your further remarks, were your homosexual friends aware that you were merely "tolerating" them? I am sure they were most grateful for your generosity and humanitarianism.

Answer 7

What you don't understand is that you shouldn't even have an opinion. Tolerance or acceptance aside, its not your F'ing business on a personal level. On a governmental level as a law abiding citizen born to my country it still not your business. I'm here, I should be treated equally. Period.
On a religous basis, your religon is like your underwear. We all have our personal beliefts but no one wants to see it in public. It shouldn't make any difference in law or politics.

Answer 8

Yes, I do understand the difference between tolerance and acceptance, and I appreciate your honesty.

Answer 9

I understand. Some don't so much care for everybody's acceptance as they do tolerance

Answer 10

But that's just IT. I DON'T CARE whether you "tolerate" it or "accept" it. It doesn't mean sh*t to me. I'm happy either way : ) Personally, I think and believe its YOUR problem, not mine!

Get a life, and stop worrying about whether I'm having sex with someone or not!