The wife and i became best friends and she talked me into trying the lifestyle. We never swapped with them just with another couple. My husband and i decided we were not liking it and stopped. she told me that us getting out of the lifestyle would'nt change our friendship. Then for no reason she stopped calling and wanting to hang out. I asked her why and she said nothing was wrong she had just been busy. One night she got drunk and admitted out loud to this other girl that she and this new chic who is in the lifestyle that they were best friends and always hung out . Do i have a right to be mad? This is all weird because her husband is my husbands manager at work.
2007-01-21 13:42:21 · 7 answers · asked by just me 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
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I agree completely with intuition. Don't be offended. We have both swinger and non-swinger friends, and although we like to hang-out with our non-swinger friends, we don't have allot of life things in common. It has nothing to do with having sex with these other friends, it's just the idea of being able to be more ourselves with our swinger friends without the fear of offending them. We love them do death, they just wouldn't understand our lifestyle choices and it makes it very difficult to be who we are around them. We really have to reign-in our personalities.
2007-01-22 03:40:25 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
No, they do it for the fun and excitement. They are secure enough in their relationship to invite others into their bed. Very few couples can do that, so more power to them!! Swinging isn't cheating because its mutual. Both hubby and wife are aware of what the other is doing. As for cheating, how many men cheat without the benefit of swinging? A lot more than men who swing with their wives.Its a mutual decision to start and a mutual decision to stop. Yes, the risk of cheating is always there, but when isn't cheating a risk in any situation? Don't look down on them for what they do. If you're really their friends, it shouldn't matter!!
2016-05-24 10:23:13 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't think you need to worry about your husbands job or anything. I think that when you asked her if it would change your relationship, she responded honestly. She probably didn't realize it would change it. But she might feel like you are judging her, or it is just easier to hang out and be friends with someone you have more things in common with. I say, have a day out for yourself, go to a spa, shopping, or whatever makes you feel good, cause that is where you will meet someone who has the same interests. It may lead you to a new best friend. Good Luck!
2007-01-21 13:51:36 · answer #3 · answered by crushedlover 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
AACK! All sounded fine until the part about her husband being your husband's manager. We have a saying: "Don't sh*t where you eat.."
Try not to feel too offended. One of our biggest complaints as swingers is that it's very difficult to find friends with whom we can truly relate. While our straight/vanilla friends are complaining about their assorted jealousies, we're wondering why they aren't turned on by their partner's attraction to someone else. If you're reading this and thinking to yourself just how out of whack that sounds, you're getting an idea of just how broad that gap really is. She may have befiended the other girl becuase they share this point of view in common. It's someone you can talk to about your deepest thoughts and she actually understands where you're coming from. If you don't identify with her lifestyle, it should come as no surprise to you that she wouldn't want to bring her thoghts about it to you, but instead bring them to someone who understands where she's coming from.
Sometimes you have to just recognize things for the way they are.
2007-01-21 17:35:02 · answer #4 · answered by intuition897 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
When people lead a deviant lifestyle they want to hang around with people that will validate their behavior. You tried it, but found that it wasn't for you. She may be feeling that your individuality is in direct contrast with what she lacks. She could even be in a situation where her husband is demanding this behavior. You'll never know. If you are her friend, there will be a time when her life unravels because of her behavior and she will seek you out. Move on, this situation doesn't have anything to do with your husband's job. Men don't process emotions that way. If and when she comes around, you can decide whether or not she is worth your time.
2007-01-21 13:53:33 · answer #5 · answered by act as if 4 · 0⤊ 2⤋
NO DO NOT GET MAD THERE IS NO REASON TO, IT IS A LIFESTYLE THAT WHEN YOU STOPPED BEING SWINGERS SHE WENT AND FOUND SOMEONE ELSE, IT IS LIKE AN ALCOHOLIC ONCE YOU STOP YOU CAN NOT HANG OUT WITH THOSE WHO STILL DRINK YOUR STILL BUDS JUST NOT SWINGING BUDS.
2007-01-21 14:01:43 · answer #6 · answered by MSG 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
no, be glad this weirdo is out of your life.
2007-01-21 13:50:47 · answer #7 · answered by alexandria1_1999 5 · 0⤊ 2⤋